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 Posted: Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:17 pm
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I wrote this pretty much in the middle of the night. It was kinda a nightmare, so it scared me. ALOT. So it might be kinda jumbled. I haven't gotten to fix it up yet.
"No mommy, I don't want to smile." The little curly-blond haired girl pouted towards her mom, ashen-faced.
"But you can't be upset forever." The mother said soothingly.
"Yes I can." She squeaked, walking away into the fog towards the house.
She regretted doing that ever since.
Persais shook her head to clear her thoughts, so she wouldn't remember what happened afterward. She was changed now, even if she didn't want to remember it.
Persais jumped out of her second-story window,her long blond hair trailing behind her, and landed on the soft grass without a sound. She stuck her nose in the air, breathing deeply.
She smiled.
There will be blood tonight.
Persais bounded off gracefully off into the dark night, her neighbors sleeping soundly in their homes, not aware of what was about to happen.
To someone who walked through ElyGrove normally, this was a warning.
Yeah, persais13 (my user) is actually a name I use to name a few of my characters that I put in my stories. I make up lots of names for stories, so if you need help naming a character, you can ask me.
Opinions?
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Posted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 7:27 pm
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Posted: Wed Jul 01, 2009 6:22 pm
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Posted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 5:22 pm
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This is one of my first stories I've ever written. I haven't really bothered to name it yet (I'm still working on it), but I figured I would post it anyway. I could always use some more critique. So, post away! And, I love compliments (of course, I don't get those often considering the fact that I'm a newbie to writing.) There's more written, but I didn't feel like posting all of it.
I stared into the morning gloom. “Hey, mom” My mom was driving the car.
“Yes, honey? Don’t tell me you’re still upset.” There goes her bell voice. She always tried to sound whimsical whenever she was talking me into doing something.
“Why do I have to go to a stupid boarding school? Can’t I go to-to...? To wherever it is that you and dad are going?” My mom and dad are biologists and have been insisting on me going to some boarding school for a few years. It was one of those snobby, rich-people schools.
“It’s Madagascar, Ley. And besides, you’ll just love this school!” There she goes again with that bell voice.
I’ve seen the brochures for it, and it was nice and all, Wrapped up in the Croatan forest of North Carolina. Beautiful climate, sunny days, nice city, good people, near a beach… I just couldn’t believe my parents wanted me to go there for three years! It’ll be my 8th, 9th, and 10th grade years… three years wasted.
I realized we had gotten to the airport. I reached for the door handle, but stopped. This would be one of the last times I would see my mom. I got out of the car. I tried to sound as happy as possible, “Bye mom, love you!”
“Love you too, L-“I shut the door. I didn't know whether to be happy about getting away from my parents, or upset about it.
I strolled out of the airport, luggage in hands. It was at least 15 minutes away from East Trinity.
“Okay, so I’m supposed to be there by 5pm…” I checked my watch. It was 3. I got out the seventy dollars my mom gave me to spend on my birthday next week.
“I guess I could do some birthday shopping...” I murmured. Now all I need is a tourist map…
“Need some help?” I turned to see who the source was. It was a guy that couldn’t have been more than a year older than me. His shaggy brown hair swayed slightly in the breeze, making red tints become more apparent.
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