Guest to prayers and church.

[EATSMEATS]

I've visited many a church and religious family in my day, but I'm not too sure what I should do while praying. To me (and most of us here) it's like talking to yourself, but I feel that I need to be courteous and somehow join or at least subtly be inactive.

Discuss what you do when:
Invited to church
at a praying dinner table
you agree to go to church, but don't want to participate.  

[G4NTZ]

When I'm at at table while everyone else is praying, I just sit and wait for them to be finnished. When I have to go to chruch for my grandparents sake, which is the only reason I've ever gone, I just sit or stand silently and listen to what the preacher has to say. It's hard to be silent when you can see loopholes with what they're saying.

So far no one's told me to speak up or participate.  

[Celestial Fireflies]

When I have to do that, I usually sit quietly and let people do their own thing. If I'm with people who would be obsessively annoying about it, I might bow my head just to keep them off my back. Whenever I have to go to church, I just sit and decompose from boredom. :'( I'll have to do that in a couple of weeks, because I'm staying with a religious friend.  

[LimeIzMyFaveColor]

yeah just don't be disrespectful about it
if they start to pray then just bow your head down til the prayer is said
you know that's it
i have to endure it everytime I go to church  

[Eccentric Detective]

I still have to go to church, and since I was raised Catholic I know the prayers and say them. But of course it's not heartfelt or meaningful at all.
I try to tolerate them and practice my logic skills by picking apart the sermon.
In general, mimic what they do and keep my thoughts to myself.  

[MissDemeter]

None of my family is religious, so I don't have to worry about that at all. But one of my friends is verrrry catholic. And we're both ballet dancers and at our recital a few months ago and she wanted to pray. I was like "Errr... you know I'm an atheist... right?" She says "Of course! biggrin Now pray with me!! scream "And of course I go " eek okay...  

[LimeIzMyFaveColor]

well praying is more a religious thing
but i think atheists could "pray" or "hope" that they would do good on an exam or what not. Of course they're not praying to a god but just to wish something as a confidence boost.

yeah there was a group of people that prayed before we performed Big River (a musical based off of Huck Finn)  

[Meirelle]

When my family prays at the dinner table, I just kind of poke at my food impatiently with a fork. Still, out of respect for them, I won't eat anything until they're done.

 

[EATSMEATS]

Meirelle

When my family prays at the dinner table, I just kind of poke at my food impatiently with a fork. Still, out of respect for them, I won't eat anything until they're done.

At least it's a little respectful right? lol But really, it is nice that you respect them and what their doing.

The reason I brought this up was because I've had dinner and been invited to church by many people and I always feel awkward. Like at my jewish friends house, they prayed and I put my head down, not folding my hands, just head down to respect their beliefs and my friend looked at me funny like "You're atheist ... why did you do that?" And I just thought it was the right thing to do. But there was one time when I was dating a girl who's family was VERY religious and I didn't want them to hate me so I actually put my head down, folded my hands and said "Amen"
Perhaps I should've said "RAmen" lol  

[Colm-kun]

Well I had to go to an Easter Service just this year with my Aunt and Uncle, and they are catholic so I'll cover question #1 and #3 here.

Basically I just went, but believe it or not I was slightly paranoid I would burst into flames or the Pastor would suddenly shout out something and I would be murdered like he somehow knew by the look in my eyes I was atheist sweatdrop
Basically all I ever do when I go to church because my family doesn't even know I'm atheist because I don't give shitsworth to tell them, I just do whatever the hell everyone else is doing. But Catholic is the worst... it's like a work out. Sit stand kneel stand kneel sit kneel stand... =_ =;; But I was born Lutheran so when I go to my old church I know what to do. But as you know along with everyone else in that building, the prayers don't mean s**t. But at the Easter reception I was pissed because he took the little "holy" water flinger and got it on my face. My Aunt said first time she went she got hit in the eye =_ =;;

BUT I've only been asked to say Lutheran grace, and you know what? Lutherans are so laid back, grace is NEVER special or has anything direct towards anything in it. It's always the same, ******** they even cut down the length.

For those of you who don't know, Lutherans cut the average grace to this:

"Come Lord Jesus, be our Guest. Let these gifts to us be blessed. Amen."
That's it. I never even LEARNED the whole thing, that's how lazy Lutherans are.  

[Nardone]

well i never really go to church.. id only go for a funeral or something.. but when someone invites me ill say okay and go and get it over with.. when people are praying at the table i normally just sit and wait for them to be over with it.. one time at my uncles house he asked me why i wasnt praying... (hes one scary mother ********..) so i told him i didnt know that one XD  

[imderanged]

I normally just bow my head in respect but don't fold my hands or pray along during prayers. generally speaking though the only time I go to church is for weddings and funerals. but last year when i was in the hospital my born-again mother-in-law asked me if she could pray with me....and I don't think she knows I'm an Atheist. I really don't want to have that particular conversation with her....and I certainly didn't have the energy for it then (I was pretty sick and on a lot of drugs) So I said OK. She folded her hands over mine and did all the praying. It really did make me very uncomfortable, but I know she meant well. I really DON'T know what I will say to her if she ever comes out and asks me point blank if I've "been saved".... For some reason I feel like it's wrong to lie about it, but at the same time, it's really not worth fighting with her about it! She could not understand my point of view and it could only cause problems. But I kind of think she will never come out and ask...I've been married to her son for 7 years already. I think we have silently established a kind of "don't ask don't tell" policy on the subject!