anybody understand?

[skippingsquirrel]

I was listening to the song Be Somebody by Nickleback (i think) when i came up with this idea, an idea to post what has happened to me and see how ppl can compare to it...
I was always i happy and energetic child, but around 7th grade...something changed...idk what, but it's caused random spurts of apathy which often times leads to depression, my life right now: A mom who annoys the shiz out of me, a funny dad, a sister who's a clone of my mom, and another sister who basically ignores me...throughout middle school, ppl made fun of me cuz of what i wore, now i where what reflects my mood, aka:emo clothes...now nobody talks to me, and i don't talk to them from fear of middle school coming back to haunt me...but my life is pretty boring, and i'm basically in a constant state of apathy at the moment, sure i laugh and still work hard, but it's like i'm a robot and i just automatically do things, without a thought against nor for it...it's not as bad as some times when i had spurts of it followed by depression, but i just can't break through the barier to emotions...it's like i'm an empty vessel...does anybody out there understand my pain???  

[R0bot0]

My life has always been like a roller coaster, sometimes fun, sometimes scary, going up, and going down. I used to be very different 2 years ago. I only cared about me, myseld, and I. I can understand what's going on in your life. Just take it like me, like a roller coaster 3nodding  

[Deluxe SORA]

Adolescence is always a strange period of one's life. I went through similar emotions but you soon develop an identity. In my psychology class, I was told teenagers go through an identity crisis which tends to sort itself out. You'll be fine and though I may not understand exactly what you are going thorugh I am still confident you will turn out ok.  

[skippingsquirrel]

...i hope you're right, cuz i don't think i can stand too much more of this...  

[R0bot0]

Take it easy. Suicide is never the answer.
It's like saying at life: "You can't fire me! Because I quit!"
It's just not the right answer 3nodding  

[hyena_of_leisure]

sorry princess but stop the mellow dramatics and look at real pain for a moment

their are millions of people across the world starving, being abused, diying, being tortured, legally insane and locked up and so so much more.

now until you have ACTUAL suffering rather then the every day emo-teens "nobody understands me! crying " crap SHUT UP!when you do come back I have plenty of empathy for those with actual pain  

[skippingsquirrel]

.....ur like...them...that's the exact same response i get from ppl who have never gone through apathy or depression...and i know i'm better off than others...and i hate myself for being so sad ALL the ********' time!!! cuz i don't have a reason in the world to be this way, yet for some reason i am, i try to find the answers, but it keeps getting worse...go ahead and believe that i'm a pampered princess, but i work hard for what i have, i do my charity work, if u can't appreciate that, then don't post here again...cuz i'm not gonna waste my time on somebody who doesn't understand...i'm not asking for ur sympathy, i just don't want u to place me in the typical teenage emo...that stereotypical crap doesn't apply to me.  

[skippingsquirrel]

XSK Ambrosia

Take it easy. Suicide is never the answer.
It's like saying at life: "You can't fire me! Because I quit!"
It's just not the right answer 3nodding

i know...but thnx for at least trying to help!=3  

[demon-wolf-goddess_death]

life for us the same...accept i have a step dad whos a jelous butthead...i myself have cuts down my arms...from hating my life..im thinkin bout suicide..not sure wich method tho...cant decide between choking or tying myself to a tree till i die of starvation...i also write emo songs...to find me on youtube look up



XxxbloodyxwolfxxX  

[Zauna]

I completely understand. I know exactly what your going through, cause I am too... I read on a poster in my biology class that 1 out of 4 women suffer from physical or mental depression at one piont of their lifes because of a certain part of our brains, so I'm sure it's just a phase 3nodding  

[skippingsquirrel]

^.^ well, at least now i know i'm not alone here...i've thought about suicide, i've cut myself a few times before, and actually held a knife to my throat once, but never had the guts to do it...i don't think death is to be feared, but the only thing to fear is fear itself and pain.....p.s.strangulation takes SO long (i know this from my friend who tried it when she was only 8yrs old!!!) that's y i would've preferred a knife directly through the heart or head or neck...quick and once it's done, no regrets! ~this is only semi-awkward...talking about forms of suicide, but this is what i constantly think about before i fall asleep...  

[skippingsquirrel]

and yeah, this is prolly just a rlly bad phase...it's been going on for about 2 years now, changing the cycle a lot, sometimes i have random spurts, other times it's ever-lasting apathy, ect...about the only thing keeping me here sometimes is the look on my friend's faces when i crack a joke, and how no matter how depressed i am, they never fail to make me smile...otherwise, i prolly wouldn't be here right now...but i do agree that depression is not a good idea, but when ppl say it's whimping out, it pisses me off cuz they generally don't understand...but if there's absolutely NO escape, then i can see how u could commit suicide, i have freedom from school and from my house, so i haven't gotten too far yet...  

[axl the azn boi]

you experienced the msot comment thing a teenager goes through
i mean your actually just another cliche right now
if u hit rock bottom then the only direction you could go is up
life is filled with comedies and tragedies that make it balanced
so good things will happen and so will bad things  

[skippingsquirrel]

axl the azn boi

you experienced the msot comment thing a teenager goes through
i mean your actually just another cliche right now
if u hit rock bottom then the only direction you could go is up
life is filled with comedies and tragedies that make it balanced
so good things will happen and so will bad things

...i realize this...life has its ups and downs...my life has a pretty good balance, and i try to be happy and live life to the fullest, yet every time i try, something keeps me back, and makes me feel like total crap.....