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Posted: Wed Dec 30, 2009 8:35 pm
Okay, so, it was christmas and it is tradition in my family to have fruitcake as a center peice on the table. We usualy have turkey, ham, mashed patatoes, dressing, etc, and the fruitcake is at the center of it all. But for some reason, no one thought to get the fruitcake this year.
So my grandma gave me ten bucks and told me not to come home with out one. She was jokeing of course but i didn't know that at the time. We live in a small town with nothing but a school and a single gas station. And we live about ten minutes from the actualy town town. Anywho. We live ten minutes from any grocerry store. So I drive to WalMart thinking 'Hey, they have just about anything with reasonably low-prices.' So ten minutes later I get to the empty parking lot of walmart. They're closed on Christmas. "Damn." I said to myself. SO I started my truck and drove to Hays witch was two minutes away. Closed.... By now i would normaly just went home and said screw it. But no. I was determind to keep the tradition alive. I thought for a minute. And decided to go to Jonesborro, a neiboring city about thirty minutes away. So, i have the windows down driving in this slightly biger town and i am stoped at a red light. well i look out my window and see a verry skiny woman on the sidewalk looking at me. She smiles and waves, so i want to be polight and i smile and wave back. She walks over to me and asks "How much you got." and Im a little confuesed as to why she would want to know. and i told her i have ten bucks. she says. "allright, i gues that'll do. Where do you live." So im thinking what the hell. is she going to stalk me or something, but I told her anyways. "Way Out there! Thats out of my usual range but your cute, so i gues it'll be allright." Thats when it hit me. Hooker. My eyes were wide open and my mouth droped. "what?" She asked me. "Im seventeen." I said still shocked.
"I thought you were a little young. So we going to do this." I floored it. Driving about 40mph in a 25, a cop pulled me over.
"Sir, do you know how fast you 'er going." He lowerd his sun glasses and looked at my OMGWTF exspression. "Sir have you been drinking today." I couldn't say anything so i shook my head no. After awhile i told him what happend he didn't believe me and he took me in. While waiting in the holding cell I met a shaddy character named Josh. He came up with a plan for us to escape. He pulled a papper clip from under his tounge and straightend it out. When the cop watching us went to the bathroom he quickly picked the lock and opend the door. I ruched to the desk of the cop and grabbed my car keys, ran out side and around the corner where they kept my truck. I put the keys in the ignition and Josh got in. He told me where he lived and I droped him off. He got out of my truck and said. "If you need anything. Anything at all, ring me up." He gave m his number.
"Fruitcake." I called him because of all that has happend.
"Yeah, I got one if you want it. My wife won't mind." my eyes lit up and I shook my head.
"Yeah, dude, that would be great." He went into his house and brought out the big cake of assorted fruits, and put it in my truck. We said our good byes and I went home. A couple of days latter the cops showed up at my house and i told them Josh held a knife up to me and made me go. The cops dropped all charges against me and arested Josh... I never heard from him, or the Jonesboro police department again.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 8:36 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 26, 2010 8:53 pm
Amazingly fantasticle 4laugh It's a little humorous too. smile I like it in a strange unexplainable way!
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Posted: Sat Feb 27, 2010 1:42 am
he held the knife to him to cut the fruit cake C:
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Posted: Sat Feb 27, 2010 5:24 pm
LOL OMG THAT A GREAT STORY!!!!XDD
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Posted: Sun Mar 07, 2010 4:09 pm
HAHAHAHA!! best story in the world! just awsome xd
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Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 12:24 am
a man and his fruitcake XD
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