Post your funniest valentines!

[purpleravenhawk]

You don't have to reveal who sent them. Or post the ones you sent to someone else. Give us all a few yuks. xd  

[purpleravenhawk]

Please, my beloved, come with me on a flacid journey to the deepest Ricky Ricardo of my peritoneal cavity. Any fool could see that we're meant for each other; won't you join me in Los Goldfish and dance with me across the undulating shoelace? The wait is too much to bear. Can't we just cast aside the formality of courtship and bone like cold chillin' hydraulics?  

[Rinioa]

Quote:

Dear Rinioa,

When I think of you, I get Bunnies in my v****a. Though it makes me feel Mewlicious, it's also exciting. Whenever we running together, it feels like all the angels in heaven are Humping at once. How could one person make me feel simultaneously hot and licious with nothing but a bat of the eyelashes and a sleep of the Eyes? I hope we can keep diving together for 1,000 years.

lovely yours,
[name removed]

 

[purpleravenhawk]

I am both disturbed and amused by the phrase "bunnies in my v****a." xd  

[Sweetkitty]

Quote:

Dearest Sweetkitty,

I cannot begin to describe how different my FOOT! burns for you. As I write this, I'm moaning in my Sanskrit, unable to contain my Groaning desire. Please, accept my tired embrace and know that you're truly the Fruit by the Foot of my eye.



I yearn for you extremly,
[name removed]

 

[purpleravenhawk]

Lol, that one almost works, except for the apparent foot fetish. xd  

[Moonracer]

Dear Moonracer,

I believe it was E Nomine who once sang, "Oh, my motorcycle, my Egypt, I've hungered for your Rose a long, aggressive time." Well, that's exactly how I feel. Or maybe I should quote your favorite rapper, Eminem, who said "Dancing ain't easy, but it's necessary, and I'm chasing hearts like Tom chases Jerry." Either way, you know what I'm getting at: will you be my Valentine?

XOXO,


(Don't know if it's my funniest but it's the only one I have right now since I deleted the only other one I got...I think but hey here is one.)  

[xwhateverxdudex]

???

Wasn't this a sticky?