Damaged

[Enchanted Seduction]

This was actually an activity in english class to expand on adjectives, but I thought it made for a nice poem(:

Damaged is not a smiling face.

Damaged is the cry of a heart in the dead of night.

Damaged is the world stained the wrong color.

Damaged is hating people and putting up a fight.

Damaged sounds like the tears that stream down your face.

Damages sounds like the hurt inside.

To be damaged is to be undermined,

crippled,

persecuted.

Damaged is irrevocable

 

[daddylatrell]

I like the "Damaged is the world stained the wrong color." metaphor!
Very interesting.
Also, nice use of vocabulary in the last lines.
I'd give it a 9/10 girlie! 4laugh

 

[clm640]

I like it. It sounds like you really wore your heart on your sleeve while writing this. I also like how you used the adjectives in the last line. It sounds great. Your off to a good start.  

[SakuraKuro91]

I really like it. smile I wish I could do write like that. I mean, I know I'm decent, but there's always room for improvement in my work. But anyway, that's really good.  

[ada9]

For me...it sound like good i like the choice of vocab. and it sounded dark and a little sad..but overall it is great biggrin  

[Enchanted Seduction]

Thanks guys(:  

[SadMachxne]

Wow. That was some of the greatest poetry I have read, and that says a lot concidering I read a lot. Really good work. Keep it up!^^

 

[Enchanted Seduction]

Wow, I didn't think it was *that* good. Thank you!(: