Bitches be Crazy

[MartianSongbird]

So here's the skinny:
My roommate dug through my trash while I was out (I don't have a crippling coke habit or anything to warrant any trash inspections) and found a used condom.
Not only is that pretty disgusting on its own and a complete violation of my trust, but to add insult to injury, she's insisting on a "no boyfriend overnight EVAR" rule even though we have separate rooms and I'm...very discreet.

Any advice, you gorgeous 18+ers, you?  

[Lady Kira X]

It's none of her business who you're bedding with :/
If you wanted rules like that, you'd still be living with your parents.

Tell her to piss off & mind her damn business.  

[Noctis Lionheart]

My question is:Who digs through the trash and pulls out a used condom....Yeah...thats a little odd....think maybe she is a jealus Lez? xD  

[Lilith of the Ashes]

If you had no rule of the sort set up before, I don't see why she's hurt now.

Also, why is she digging through your trash? You should confront her about her nose needing to stay on her face and not in your trash. That's a cardinal rule that all room/housemates should keep sacred.

I'd consider looking for a new roommate if she keeps trying to "dig up" your "bad habits."

I'd keep an eye out on her for a while. Let her know her behavior has caused you to lose some of your trust for her. Just don't sit there and act like nothing happened; believe me, it'll hurt you later.  

[icywind1980]

ScarletPhobia

So here's the skinny:
My roommate dug through my trash while I was out (I don't have a crippling coke habit or anything to warrant any trash inspections) and found a used condom.
Not only is that pretty disgusting on its own and a complete violation of my trust, but to add insult to injury, she's insisting on a "no boyfriend overnight EVAR" rule even though we have separate rooms and I'm...very discreet.

Any advice, you gorgeous 18+ers, you?

Do you need her there? If not kick her out and find a new roomie. If you have your own room, she has no right to dictate what you do in it, let alone go in it when you're not there.  

[The lost angel4]

yeah tell her to kick rocks. Its none of her business who is in your bed and how long they were there. I'd have to ask her if invading each other privacy was against her "rules"  

[Madame No]

I completely agree with Lilith and Lady Kira. You definitely need to have a sit-down talk with her about this new rule. You're obviously over 18; you're an adult now. Like Kira said, "If you wanted rules like that, you'd still be living with your parents." And it is ridiculous that she went through your trash.

Do you guys have conflicting views regarding religion and/or premarital sex? Maybe explain that you respect her views and feelings about this, but that you are also paying rent and that you feel that your freedom shouldn't be restricted thus. You said you are quite discreet... she should have nothing to worry about.

Turning it around, I can see it from her viewpoint, especially if she's under 21: "My roommate is having sex in the room next to mine." Maybe it's just new to her. I'd give her time to adjust to the idea, but tell her you don't agree with this new rule and will not adhere to it. But do institute a rule saying "No rummaging through each others trash." (That should have been a given, but maybe some people have less respect for privacy than others, and it needs to be written out.)

If she just can't live with you having your boyfriend visit overnight, you may have to agree to disagree and find a new roommate or get your own place. Ask her to finish out any lease you have so neither of your lease histories are damaged, then move on. Try not to let it totally ruin your friendship, though; if you aren't living together, this issue shouldn't be an issue anymore (unless it's the religion and/or premarital sex thing, then that could be tricky).

Good luck.  

[Lime Kiss]

Why did she go through your trash in the first place? Did she actually hear you and your boyfriend and was looking for proof? (in which case, at least you used protection) Or was she guided by sheer paranoia?

Either way, what you do in your room is none of her business as long as you're not keeping her up at night.

Let us know how it goes.  

[g0th_chick_uk]

i have two brief points
one, good on you for using one
two, its time for a new room mate



live life dont suffer it.  

[Th3 WereWolf]

this is one reason the new movie about a crazy roomate freaks me out
luckily my roomate is black and i just feel like i live in BET  

[DarkBeautyLayla]

Bottom line is she cannot tell you that you can't have your bf over. She can complain all she wants about it but there is really nothing she can do. So just have over your friends and hopefully she will just get upset and leave lol  

[Kurisu Alba]

Sounds like she is jealous and she isn't your mom where she can tell you what to do. You are both adults and live your own lives.  

[sogoodheart]

Ugh gross, what a psycho.... did she "present" the evidence to you after she found it? talk2hand
Get a new roomie.  

[EggAtix]

Honestly, if it was me, I would tell her to go do ******** herself, get a lock installed on my door, get a bumpin' sound system, and play an audio recording of "The Joy Of Sex" extremely loudly at all times.

But thats just me.

Regardless of what you think of my advice, I would definitely suggest getting a lock installed on your door.