Confused and Guilty

[miss reku]

So I'm a highschooler. I'll just start off by saying that. Freshman, actually. And, I'm in our school's One Act play. For those of you who don't know what a One Act is, it's a copetition play that has to be 37 (I think) minutes long. We compete against other school's plays, too. It's really fun, and our cast is just the best. Like a second family. So, it's no surprise that other feelings would arise, too, right?

Well, here's what happened. I'm up late tonight, and got a text from one of my cast mates. He's got the lead in our One Act, is very talented, and dare I say, adorable! He's a really nice guy, smart, funny, and a total gentleman! I've had a small crush on him for a bit, you see, and when he texts me I just smile. In fact, just seeing him makes me smile because, well, he's always smiling. Anyways, I got a text, saying he had a really random question. I told him to 'ask away'.

He wanted to know if it was a good idea to ask one of my best friends to a movie.

I'm so conflicted and confused now. I love my friend. She's the greatest. We're very close, and there's just about nothing I wouldn't do for her. But I feel so horrible now. I'm sad, because she's the one he likes, but I know I should be happy for her. I feel so guilty for not being. I don't know. Neither of us (my friend or myself) has been asked out before. This would so great for her. I don't think she'd accept, though. She's got someone else she likes. I told the boy as much. I just... I want to know if I'm reading too far into this. I tend to do that. I just want her to be happy, really! But, is it so wrong to want happiness for myself, too?  

[Zenally]

Awww! Your soo sweet! It not unusual to be a little jealous of a friend. Or or lot. Either way, you still have good intentions toward your friend, so no harm done! Plus, she'll probably say no, and he'll probably move on. Then you can pine away in peace. xd Also, break a leg in the competition!  

[miss reku]

Thanks. That means a lot to me. I ended up asking her, out of my own curiousity, whether or not she'd date him if given the chance, and she said she would. *sigh* So I told him to go for it. Now I just hope things work out, feelings don't get hurt, and that if she says yes, she doesn't forget about me...  

[Nocturnabelle]

Oh, hon, you are a really sweet person. Loyal, too! No, it isn't wrong for you to want happiness for yourself too. It seems selfish right? It isn't. Your just as important as your friends are to you. I understand how you feel, been through this a few times. It's hard, very hard. You want to be happy for your friend but you want to be happy too. It's good that you told her to go for it, even if it seems like it isn't. Friends go through a bit of trouble now and then.

A true friend wouldn't forget you. And it may hurt now but there are other guys out there. People come and go but true friends will always be there. Hopefully, everything works out. I don't know how your friend is, and I don't know the personality of your crush but sometimes talking things out helps? Either way, keep your eyes peeled and don't give up. Your loyalty and sweet personality is bound to attract more friends and a cutie along the way. With that said, I'm so sorry that I wrote a novel to you. I will be signing off now, hope this helps somehow. You can always contact me if it doesn't, I'll try to think of better advice.

Sincerely,
II Zetsumei Chan II

 

[miss reku]

I'm certainly not sorry you wrote a 'novel'. Thank you for the advice; I'm seriously thinking of talking to my friend about it. I just don't want her to feel guilty about it... Well, maybe a little, but not enough to make herself unhappy. I just want her to know how I feel. But she has a jerkish sense of humor sometimes, so I worry about how it would go over...

But, here's an UPDATE, for anyone who cares: He asked her out already. Tonight, in fact, just about an hour or so ago. I cried a little. She's so happy. It's the first time she's ever been asked out. They're giong to a movie Friday, I think.

I guess I'm just really scared that she's going to leave me. Neither of us had ever had a boyfriend before (we'd never even been asked out). And, now that she has, I'm worried that it's gonna change her. I really don't want to lose her, especially not over a guy! He's two years older, and I know they won't last very long, as most high school relations. But I'm friends with both of them, and I would really rather not have to chose between them if things got... ugly.  

[Nyaneki]

Sounds a lot like a friend of mine and me. Things like this happen to me a lot with my friend. She's really lucky when it comes to boys.. I guess it has something to do with how freakin' pretty she is.. It usually goes like I like a guy, that guy likes her, she ends up 'liking' the guy because he likes her. Then the guy does something stupid or gross and she stops liking him. The worst part is, whenever she stops liking a guy, she usually ends up hating his guts. I have never had a boyfriend, and technically neither has she, but she's been so much closer than I have ever been. She confuses me so much...
Anyways... Just wanted to say, I understand how you feel.. sweatdrop