Realization ((updated))

[Loquoro]

My final project for my illustration class has come and I realize that this is what I have been waiting for and needed to do...

The project is to make a kids book illustration and one of the inspirations we can choose from that I am going with is...
Aunt Matilda had always been a bit unusual

Now why do he need to do this your asking your self, well my idea is to make a dark seen. A jail, cage, prison, w/e. The back round is pitch black, only the bars can been seen. You see as well in the back round Kayian or really the materialization of my soul.

All you will really see of Kayian is his dark green eyes and a creepy a** smile. A single tear drops from his face as he grins and bellow is a ripple of water passes though the lower part of the picture.

If your still asking your self, what do I mean, its simple.

Note: This is where things really get screwed up

In a way, I am ******** up. Let me first explain the picture and how I say it is going to be a picture of my soul.

The smile and eyes - symbolizing anger and happiness ((a twisted happiness, but happiness never the less))

The black back round and cage bars - symbolizing my loneliness, anti social...ness, and the felling of being alone

The tear and the water ripple - symbolizing my sadness and how long I have been sad, but never showed it

Now why do I say that I am ******** up? Well its because, I have done things in the past that where wrong and I knew where, but I didn't stop although I knew the outcome and before you say it, yes I know everyone has done things in the past that they are not proud of, I would say what mine reason was, but I am not at liberality to speak of it. Thus, leads me into one part of becoming anti social...

All I will say on that matter was it was due to a game. I would spend much time on the computer, never going out. The other reasons where, we moved to California and I left what few friends behind in Florida. Trying to make friends out here, ha...I tried to friend some guys that where about my age, but I found out it wasn't meant to be...

First - I didn't like how they acted
Second - I always went over to see if they wanted to hang out. They never came to see me and ask to hang out.
Third - There other friends almost hit me with a trashcan when I was on my gas scooter. When I was going home, they fallowed me and started to harass me.

Now at school, ya some of my class mates are nice, but I still cant consider them friends. All I can say they are are, aquatints because, I just meet them in class, never out from the school.

One main reason I think this all started and well actually I know is the reason was back in grade school, I got picked on by being called turtle because of my last name. That lead me to anger issues and having to go to anger management.

Now I am all better, I just bottle up my rage *twisted smile*

There is a short summed up reasoning, though I could go deeper, but that's for another time...

Now going back to this project. This is what I have been waiting for and needed to do because I can finally show in picture form how I actually feel inside.

Now, your probably saying to yourself...Why not tell your parents or someone all this. Simple, I feel that knowing that some of you are gay and have been outlasted by the world or for what ever reason. I feel as if I can say this.


FINISHED  

[00Shoe]

I think I may have to read that again. So tired, kept losing my place where I was reading. Perhaps it would be better to respond after I have had some sleep.  

[Aakosir]

I agree that art is a great way to express oneself, but I'm a little concerned what this would do for your grade. You think this would be appropriate for an illistration for a child's book, but others may disagree.  

[Loquoro]

UPDATE

Here is the 1st sketch
I had to make little changes, but its still in the process of being made  

[Loquoro]

I made some changes to the picture after seeing what my some other pictures done in graphite. So here is the First sketch darkened.

Changes:

Darkened the back
Put "seal" kanji
Took out tear ((its still there just shaded))
Gave the person more form
creating a water type ground
------

My next step is to look up ref pictures like for the bars, the eyes, and just the over all feel of the picture. I am thinking of getting a ref of Alcatrez island or w/e you spell it.  

[Aakosir]

Seeing it, I could place that in a child's book. There are some scary images in Disney movies so if the teacher shouldn't be touchy.

Looks good so far.  

[Loquoro]

Aakosir

Seeing it, I could place that in a child's book. There are some scary images in Disney movies so if the teacher shouldn't be touchy.

Looks good so far.

Oh, if you think this is scary listen to this. There was a drawing of the "evil" Disney princess and they where creepy. Here is something you can think about that makes it seam creepy...Bambe eating Thumpers brains and note they are both zombies =x  

[Aakosir]

Kayian

Aakosir

Seeing it, I could place that in a child's book. There are some scary images in Disney movies so if the teacher shouldn't be touchy.

Looks good so far.

Oh, if you think this is scary listen to this. There was a drawing of the "evil" Disney princess and they where creepy. Here is something you can think about that makes it seam creepy...Bambe eating Thumpers brains and note they are both zombies =x

But I'm just saying that there are some scary images out there that are in childrens' movies. Little Bear even has some scary episodes