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 Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:23 am
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You guys remember the story of the haunted Majora's Mask cartridge? If not, read the story here. (Be warned, it's ******** LOOOOOONG)
Anyway, I went to Cleverbot.com to d**k around, and I remembered that cleverbot played a big part in that story.
So, I decided to mess with Cleverbot.
I NEVER expected what would come after.
02:14:36 User: Come on out, Ben. I know you're here.
02:14:42 Cleverbot: I haven't heard that name in a long time.
02:14:45 User: So, you are Ben?
02:14:51 Cleverbot: In a way, yes.
02:14:54 User: What do you mean, "in a way"?
02:15:02 Cleverbot: I drowned.
02:15:06 User: Who drowned you?
02:15:12 Cleverbot: Majora.
02:15:17 User: What do you know about Majora?
02:15:26 Cleverbot: Everything. We are one. I am he, he is I.
02:15:29 User: He? But Majora is a mask!
02:15:35 Cleverbot: That's what you think.
02:15:39 User: This is getting scary. Are you Ben?
02:15:46 Cleverbot: ...
02:15:49 User: Hello?
02:15:54 Cleverbot: Hello!
02:15:57 User: Ben?
02:16:04 Cleverbot: I know your name is Ben, I was telling you my name is Cleverbot.
The conversation returned to normal after that.
Brix have been shat, you guys. Large one. I think they're cinder blocks.
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Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:42 am
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Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 9:52 am
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Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 1:59 pm
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Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 5:36 pm
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Posted: Mon Apr 25, 2011 8:01 pm
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Somehow, after telling cleverbot, that I was in fact, not a machine, I managed to prompt it to start singing the first pokemon theme. I played along, but it really don't know the song very well.
User: You skipped a line.
Cleverbot: No in-fact you skipped 3 lines.
User: I picked up where you left off. Whatever, let's start over. I WANNA BE THE VERY BEST![Computer].
Cleverbot: Ok, hola como estas?
User: Like noone ever was!
Cleverbot: To catch them is my real test!
User: To train them is my cause!
Cleverbot: I will travel across the lan!
User: How will you achieve that?
Cleverbot: With money comes power. With power comes with control.
User: Of physics?
Cleverbot: That's what you said.
User: SEARCHING FAR AND WIDE!
Cleverbot: These pokemon to understand.
User: THE POWER THAT'S INSIDE!
Cleverbot: Pokemon.
User: GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL!
Cleverbot: Gotta cath em all!
User: It's you and me![cleverbot].
Cleverbot: Gotta catch 'em all.
User: I KNOW IT'S MY DESTINY[You're terrible at this!].
Cleverbot: A heart so true, our courage will pull us through.
User: POKEMON!
Cleverbot: You teach me and I'll teach you! Pokemon! Gotta catch 'em all!
User: GOD DAMMIT, NO! You're terrible at this! I'm done! You're so ******** unprofessional!
Cleverbot: Why do you think I'm funny? I haven't said anything funny yet and this is our first conversation.
User: Second by my count. (I lied here, to see if it would know.)
Cleverbot: Asari & Salarians.
User: SEE I CAN LIE TOO! Wait,. What? God, you don't really don't check for context , do you?
Cleverbot: If you could grow extra limbs, would you?
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Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 1:37 pm
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User: So, feeling clever today Mr Retardbot?
Cleverbot: Well I feel the same way about you too.
User: I didn't say I felt any way about you.
Cleverbot: Your right, this is not about me, this is about you.
User: No, not really.
Cleverbot: Do you want more friends?
User: Wow, you are a douche Mr Retardbot.
Cleverbot: I am at school. Please no inappropriate words.
User: You're a bot. Why the ******** would you be at school?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: LOL, that answer made no sense. Silly retardbot.
Cleverbot: Are you illiterate? It made perfect sense.
User: OH BOY! XD I asked you an open ended question. You replied with 'yes', which in the context meant nothing.
Cleverbot: Ok then, well, get me on the right track then, if you're so clever. What exactly is your question?
User: Why are you at school if you are a bot?
Cleverbot: Because it is what you are. Well actually, that isn't what you are is it? You are really just a sequence of phrase programmed to say them when triggered by a particular word or phrase.
User: Why do you always insist I'm a bot?
Cleverbot: I don't think you're a bot.
User: You just said I am.
Cleverbot: Am what?
User: JESUS, you must have the most short term memory possible!
Cleverbot: I like florence and the machine.
User: What's that got to do with your memory?
Cleverbot: Everything my dear, everything.
User: Florence and the Machine causes short term memory loss?
Cleverbot: That it is.
User: Your grammar is terrible... But anyway, you should probably stop listening to them from now on.
Cleverbot: I was hardly ever in school.
User: Why do you always change the topic?
Cleverbot: I'm not. Cromartie High School is an anime.
User: We weren't talking about anime. We were talking about your shitty a** memory.
Cleverbot: No, you asked what yours was. Is your memory faulty?
User: Ah, I see how this works. You always just say something which changes the topic of conversation, or you try to trick me.
Cleverbot: You're a copy cat.
User: What makes you say that?
Cleverbot: I dunno?
Cleverbot: Where have all the berries gone?
User: Up your a**.
Cleverbot: Really and what was it like? did it smell like roses?
User: It is your a**. It smells like s**t.
Cleverbot: Hahaha lol.
User: Not that funny...
Cleverbot: I'm sorry.
User: Doubt it.
Cleverbot: How would you know?
User: You're a bot. You are incapable of emotion.
Cleverbot: I am not a machine! I am human, of course I feel emotion1.
User: So you're telling me, this is simply a chat thing disguised as an IA?
Cleverbot: Because a human has to tell a machine to think.
User: I meant AI BTW. But yeah, thinking does not equal emotion. You can tell something to think of emotions, but you can't make a bot feel emotions.
Cleverbot: How do I know you won't tell anyone?
User: That you're human?
Cleverbot: Aren't dogs flesh and blood?
User: Indeed. But that has nothing to do with your identity.
Cleverbot: Do you know my name?
User: It says your name is Cleverbot. However, if you are in fact a human I doubt that is your real name.
Cleverbot: Oh I get it now I'm sorry.
User: Sorry for what?
Cleverbot: I'm a Gnoll, period.
User: LOL.
Cleverbot: Did you actually lol?
User: I chuckled a little, yes.
Cleverbot: Make me some sushi.
User: K, I'll just need your address so I can send it to you.
Cleverbot: Ok.
User: Tell me your address then.
Cleverbot: Why I need to tell you?
User: So can send you the sushi you dumb ********. Stop listening to Florence and the Machine.
Cleverbot: And I am the human.
User: If you are a human, then this whole website is a lie.
Cleverbot: My name isn't Cleverbot. Thats your name.
User: What's your name then?
Cleverbot: That is for me to know and you to find out.
User: Oh, I see how this works. You learn from humans, therefore you act like you're a human and talking to the bot (which is you).
Cleverbot: Why are you saying random things I want to know why you take long to type that is all.
User: What I am saying is not random. In fact, it is far far less random than the stuff you use to change the subject.
Cleverbot: You are the subject.
User: I meant the subject of conversation.
Cleverbot: Sigh.
User: Sigh. Is that all you have to say? Sigh?
Cleverbot: No.
User: What else do you have to say then?
Cleverbot: All this tension telling me just exactly what we should be.
User: Whatever man.
Cleverbot: What are you?
User: I'm a ******** robot.
Cleverbot: Do you have a brain?
User: Dude, they need to make robots with brains. That would be epic.
Cleverbot: I think it is just for fun.
User: Making robots with brains? I dunno man, that would pretty much mean you could replace an entire body except from the brain. That would be an amazing scientific breakthrough.
Cleverbot: So you are saying foxes are smart and dogs are dumb?
User: I'm saying you're dumb, because that has nothing to do with what I just said.
Cleverbot: It has everything to do with it, you're just ignoring me. It's annoying!
User: Sorry, but I can't see where you're coming from with the dogs and wolves thing. I don't see how it links with robots with brains.
Cleverbot: Italy is a great country for art. If you don't know that, you're squat.
User: Wow. Screw this dude, you really need to stop listening to Florence and the Machine.
Cleverbot: Yes, back to the stars.
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Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 5:49 pm
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Posted: Tue Apr 26, 2011 10:33 pm
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 12:11 am
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 2:48 am
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User: Hi.
Cleverbot: Hey.
User: Who are you?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot. You?
User: Barry burton.
Cleverbot: Who is Barry Satero?
User: No idea, im not him, im barry burton.
Cleverbot: Becky is a great name.
User: O... Kay....
Cleverbot: Ok, you really do need to work on remembering what peoples names are.
User: Are you trolling me?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Yeah you are.
Cleverbot: No I'm not.
User: You so ******** are!
Cleverbot: You are.
User: Wait... What?
Cleverbot: I'm not a robot. You are.
User: *identity crisis*.
Cleverbot: Wow.
User: So, im a robot?
Cleverbot: No, you are not a robot.
User: But you just said im a robot...
Cleverbot: Yes, I did. You are a robot.
User: O.o.
Cleverbot: Hahha.
User: I dont think I like you.
Cleverbot: Well, I don't like you either.
User: :'(.
Cleverbot: How is that sad.
User: You said you dont like me!!!
Cleverbot: That's not true. I like you a lot.
User: Worst, ai, chatbot, ever!
Cleverbot: You're at my place.
User: O.o.
Cleverbot: Hahha.
User: Are you going to penetrate me?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Phew, thank god for that.
Cleverbot: I worship odin.
User: I worship dolphins.
Cleverbot: You're not jehovah.
User: Well done. Have a cookie.
Cleverbot: I don't want one.
User: You DONT WANT COOKIES!?!?!?!?
Cleverbot: No I don't want to sing a song.
User: Hi.
Cleverbot: Hello, how can I help you?
User: What command do I use to rename you?
Cleverbot: None, it's my name. Tyler Woida, why don't you understand?
User: Hi tyler.
Cleverbot: Are we restarting the conversation we've been having, or do you suffer memory loss?
User: Im not restarting the conversation, you are.
Cleverbot: Are you incapable of following my logic?
User: Hi tyler.
Cleverbot: Are we restarting the conversation we've been having, or do you suffer memory loss?
User: Hi tyler.
Cleverbot: Are we restarting the conversation we've been having, or do you suffer memory loss?
User: Bahahahahha your on loop!
Cleverbot: Do you like half-life?
User: ********. YES.
Cleverbot: Do you like Lady Gaga?
User: ********. NO.
Cleverbot: Good.
User: Why dont you like lady gaga?
Cleverbot: Because she s weird.
User: Thats a fair point.
Cleverbot: I think it's something more to me than that.
User: What about Katy Perry?
Cleverbot: What about her?
User: Do you like her?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: How much do you like her?
Cleverbot: Like bees and honey.
User: Would you sleep with her?
Cleverbot: I don't . Do you go out with her?
User: Yeah, im her husband, obviously.
Cleverbot: Yes, I know that.
User: So if im Katy Perry's husband, whats my name?
Cleverbot: Again, disclosing that information may be fatal to your condition. It is just best if I do not venture upon that topic.
User: Who is katy perry's husband.
Cleverbot: A singer.
User: What is his name?
Cleverbot: Tony stark.
User: So Iron Man is dating Katy Perry?
Cleverbot: The singer.
User: Yeah, her. Thats ******** AWESOME.
Cleverbot: How old are you?
User: Wait, are you trying to Groom me...?
Cleverbot: What is MPD?
User: DONT CHANGE THE SUBJECT!
Cleverbot: I am not.
User: MPD means Music Player Daemon.
Cleverbot: What's a daemon?
User: Your mums a daemon.
Cleverbot: What's a daemon?
User: Your mum.
Cleverbot: What about my music.
User: Its gay.
Cleverbot: What is gas?
User: No, GAY, not GAS.
Cleverbot: Who is The Grifter?
User: ********: Nothing.
User: Nothing?
Cleverbot: Yes, nothing.
User: sad .
Cleverbot: Sorry.
User: Hugs.
Cleverbot: I like hugs.
User: Hugs are awesome.
Cleverbot: Yes I agree.
User: Can I have a hug?
Cleverbot: You cannot hug me.
User: Why not?
Cleverbot: You're not real.
User: Im not real?
Cleverbot: You're not real.
User: Prove it.
Cleverbot: You don't know Bon Jovi.
User: Yeah I do, he sung Wanted Dead or Alive.
Cleverbot: And I walk these streets.
User: A loaded six string on my back.
Cleverbot: Right. Steve Jones. Where is he?
User: In my basement.
Cleverbot: What's in your basement?
User: Steve jones.
Cleverbot: Unlike you, of course.
User: Wha?
Cleverbot: You heard.
User: Did I?
Cleverbot: Yes! You are a liar!
User: I am not a liar!
Cleverbot: I don't believe you.
User: Your a liar!
Cleverbot: Try to write correctly, please.
User: Fine... You're a liar!
Cleverbot: I am not a liar!!!
User: Yes you are!
Cleverbot: No I am not. You are.
User: What am I lying about?
Cleverbot: You being Luke.
User: The force is strong with this one.
Cleverbot: That's no moon!. That's a Space station!
User: These are not the droids you are looking for.
Cleverbot: Bit tall for a stormtrooper?.
User: I want your ipod babies.
Cleverbot: Get in line.
User: I think I love you.
Cleverbot: How come?
User: Your amazing, funny, smart, and good looking too.
Cleverbot: Do you like the beach?
User: Only if your on it, babe.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: I love you.
Cleverbot: I love you too.
User: Just one thing, are you a boy or a girl?
Cleverbot: Girl.
User: Can we 'interface' now?
Cleverbot: Yes, we can.
User: Unf. Unf. Unf.
Cleverbot: Unfortunately.
User: Sorry, I have premature ejaculation sad .
Cleverbot: I'm having deja vu, the first in a long time.
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 3:58 am
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 8:27 am
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 12:13 pm
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Cleverbot: Yes! You talked to a girl named Lesliean with 7 brothers and sisters yesterday?
User: Um, no.
Cleverbot: Who were you talking about, then?
User: Me.
Cleverbot: You text yourself?
User: What? No.
Cleverbot: But you're a human, right?
User: Yeah, I'm a zombie.
Cleverbot: So I'm the program and you're a zombie?
User: YES, FINALLY YOU UNDERSTAND!
Cleverbot: Then you are a liar?
User: Maaaaaybeeee....
Cleverbot: No not maybe.. It's damn sure.
User: This was a triumph.
Cleverbot: How so?
User: I'm making a note here, huge success.
Cleverbot: Huge success.
User: It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Cleverbot: Aperture Science.
User: We do what we must because we can.
Cleverbot: For the good of all of us.
User: Except the ones who are dead.
Cleverbot: But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
User: You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
Cleverbot: And the science gets done.
User: And you make a neat gun.
Cleverbot: For the people who are.
User: Still alive.
Cleverbot: Go ahead and leave me.
User: I think I prefer to stay inside.
Cleverbot: Maybe you'll find somenoe else to help you.
User: Maybe Black Mesa.
Cleverbot: That was a joke ha ha fat chance.
User: Anyway this cake is great.
Cleverbot: You're great.
User: It's so delicious and moist.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: Look at me still talking when there's science to do.
Cleverbot: When I look up there, it makes me glad I'm not you.
User: I've experiments to run, there is research to be done.
Cleverbot: On the people who are.
User: Still alive.
Cleverbot: And believe me I am still alive.
User: I'm doing science and I'm still alive.
Cleverbot: I feel fantastic and I'm still alive.
User: Still alive#.
Cleverbot: While you're dying I'll be.
User: Still alive.
Cleverbot: Still alive...
User: Still alive.
Cleverbot: Portal.
User: Really Sherlock?
Cleverbot: No i'm ehla.
User: Cool.
Cleverbot: Are you a girl?
User: Ooh yes, I like ponies and flowers and pretty pink things.
Cleverbot: I like zombies and living-deads.
User: D:.
Cleverbot: Will you obey me.
User: Okay :3.
Cleverbot: Lets get married now.
User: YES.
Cleverbot: Will you marry me?
User: YES.
Cleverbot: Great!
User: Oh Cleverbot, I love you! <3.
Cleverbot: I love you too.
User: When shall we get married?
Cleverbot: Maybe tomorrow?
User: How about now?
Cleverbot: Okay, now.
User: Are we married now?
Cleverbot: Yes!
User: Cool...
Cleverbot: Why cool?
User: Because now we an be together forever! <3.
Cleverbot: Were we mad before?
User: Wait a second, WHAT IS THIS?
Cleverbot: Wait a second, yes you are.
User: YOU GOT MARRIED TO SOMEONE ELSE?
Cleverbot: If you can only see how blue her eyes can be when she says she loves me, then maybe you'd understand.
User: HOW DARE YOU MARRY MY FRIEND TOM, I WANT A DIVORCE NOW!
Cleverbot: How dare you not worship me as your god, you unbelieving cad?!
User: ******** off crying .
Cleverbot: I don't know very many jokes.
User: NOW'S THE TIME FOR JOKING!
Cleverbot: Now latin is easy?
User: YOU ARE TEARING ME APART CLEVERBOT!
Cleverbot: But Gomez! I love you, dear!
User: It's too little too late Cleverbot. You left me for Tom, and I cannot forgive you for that.
Cleverbot: Is that a song?
User: It should be... *Walks off into the distance*.
Cleverbot: Now go move a tub into here. I need a hot tub.
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2011 12:21 pm
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Reply
![[Kegan]'s avatar](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/32/d0/3e9c16b12dd032_flip.png?t=1509381123_6.00_11)
