DEMON & TRAVEL Profiles

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

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[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"One at your level of strength could never possibly defeat me."

Complete Appearance
"......."
My name is...... Hiepacth Hael Sygil
But you can call me... Lord Hei, Hei-sama, Hael. Only my mate is permitted to be overly familliar with me.
I am obviously a... Male
And I was born in appearance, 23 years ago.
Look how special I am! High level Full Demon
Keep Swinging... Pansexual // Seme
Puzzle Pieces... [ D ]
Look what I can do! In his full demonic form, Hei is capable of controlling wind and lightning; this ranges from the production and use of both elements to Hei using stray breezes to travel in a form reminiscant of flight or teleportation. When Hei is upset, dry lightning storms tend to crop up in the immediate area, and he's more then capable of making them strike specific targets if he wants to.
I can be pretty... Hei is, by birth, an extremely powerful and dignified demon prince, and so it is only fitting that he would act as such at all times; often appearing to be very aloof, unfriendly and indifferent to the plights of others, many of his own kind tend to describe him as a very cruel and unfeeling sort of individual. His pride is immeasureable, and so there have been numerous times when Hei has made what most would say is the wrong decision to avoid looking foolish; even so, his reasoning for doing such usually falls to his strong feelings of emulation for his father, and how a demon should properly act upon any number of circumstances. Hei's relationship with his younger brother Naoya is immensely complicated, and while the older demon often regards his sibling as nothing but a waste of time and a disgrace to everything he stands for, the truth is, Hei is simply incapable of understanding anything besides the most obvious and black and white of emotions and lines of judgement; his social skills leave much to be desired, and so he often does the wrong thing at the worst of times, such as smiling when someone is in pain because he simply can't grasp the difference between tears of joy and tears of sadness. Despite all these flaws and the large factor of intimidation, however, Hei has his good qualities too; his patience is great and far reaching, and those he can positively identify with caring for are given great amounts of protection. Hei rarely ever smiles or makes jokes, but those who have seen such miraculous events are more then capable of testifying that for the most part, Hei is a well rounded sort of man.
Hitting Rewind...Born as the first and oldest son of the great and powerful demonic entity Satan, from the very begginning Hei's life was one of privellage and recognition; well into his childhood it was expected he would take over his father's position of the ruler of hell once he passed on or stepped down, and as such Hei was forced to grow up rather quickly and without much fanfare or ceremony. Most of his earlier days consited of primary education and the training of his natural demonic powers, and because of his isolation from other children his age, Satan's prodigy became a very cruel and indifferent individual; the birth of his younger brother, Naoya, didn't help in the slightest. The day Naoya came into the world, Hei still remembers, Satan smiled for the first time in thousands of years, something Hei had never been able to make his father do despite his never complaining and enduring. To this day he wonders if it was because he bore no resemblance to his human mother, who Satan had embarked upon a blind affair with and had chosen to take responsibility over; this may also explain his deathly hatred of humans and anything related to them, though Hei digresses upon the matter. Regardless, Hei found himself spending less and less time at home, and when God called upon Satan to take away all the light in the world, Hei volunteered immediatly to go to the surface world and take the orb back to hell when things went south for God and his plans began to crumble; surely with so much power in his hands, his father would reward him, and praise him.

Satan sent Naoya along with him, and Hei was greatly angered, but said nothing of his father's decision; after all, Naoya was still young, considered in demon standards, surely he would do no damage to Hei's plans. But then his sibling went along and foolishly fell in love with a human, of all things; having spent his entire life jealous of his human mother and half human sibling who his father had become so enamored with, the greatly angered demon crept upon the human guarding the orb of souls in the dark of night and peirced him through the heart, leaving Naoya to take the blame for all of it. After all, because of his foolishness the orb was unable to be retrieved as a whole! Naturally though, to come back to Hell without the orb was an unacceptable option, so Hei has spent the last few human centuries roaming the world and collecting its fragments, so that someday he will be able to go home, the orb in his possession, and claim the things that his brother took from him. It's a difficult job, especially since he has to keep his mate happy as well, but one Hei is not about to abandon.
Tools of the Trade... Hei's left hand is encased with a weapon somewhat like a clawed gauntlet that his father, Satan, gave him for his last birthday (Hei has yet to thank him, and doesn't plan to); it's tips are laced with posion, which is how he killed that useless human plaything of Naoya's so long ago. Other then that he doesn't keep much on his person; rather he uses and discards things as he sees the need for them.
I really enjoy... Despite seeming so stiff and forever busy, Hei is actually a pretty simple guy; give him a book to read, or a patch of sunlight to sleep in and he'll be just fine.
Love it! Haruki, handsome men, pretty women, spicy foods, warm weather, being left alone to do as he pleases, intelligent conversation.
Eew, Nasty! Most humans, most half demons, his brother Naoya, anyone touching or coming too close to Haruki, sweet foods, being touched without permission.
Turn it up!
Club can't handle Me // Flo Rida ft. David Guetta
Sssh, don't tell! It has ocassionally crossed my mind that Father favors Naoya more then he does me; after all, he looks far more like our mother despite his obvious weakness in comparison to myself. Touch my mate and you'll lose a hand...I get....posessive, sometimes.
Am I forgetting something...? Are you implying that someone such as myself is forgetful?
I'll deny it! What an ignorantly useless query..I am already mated.
My lord, god and master is Whitefiregirl  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"Go soak your head."

Human and Full Demon
"Tch.."
My name is...... Naoya Olivier Sygil
But you can call me... Naoya or Nao, and that's it. I get called Young Lord at times...but it's irritating and I know they don't actually mean it.
I am obviously a... Male
And I was born Looking around 19 years ago.
Look how special I am! High level Half Demon
Keep Swinging... Pansexual // Seke
Puzzle Pieces... [ A ]
Look what I can do! Naoya's primary ability is everything and anything that can be accomplished with fire; his core body temperature as a partial demon is much higher then that of a normal human being so he is given resistance to flames and burns, and in full demon mode he can produce anywhere to the smallest of flames on the tip of his finger to creating the largest wildfires in all of humanity.
I can be pretty... Though at first glance it may not seem like it, Naoya is a very complicated sort of person, with many different qualities depending on the situations and circumstances he is put into. At his core, Naoya is the sort of person who acts before he thinks, and who takes issue with almost everyone to a ridiculously extreme degree; he gets angry before he gets upset, and has probably offended everyone he's ever met with his frequently narrow minded veiws and selfish decisions. However, the truth of the matter is that Naoya is very insecure by nature, and having been consistantly ridiculed for his half demon status despite being the son of the most powerful demon in all of hell, has developed this violent and offensive persona to keep himself from being kicked around. A very prideful individual, Naoya will never ask for help, not even when he's at his worst and the most in need of it, but should he be asked to offer assistance most of the time he'll do so, if not begrudgingly. Unlike his older brother, Naoya understands emotions fairly well, regardless of the fact that he chooses to ignore them most of the time, and so he posesses a very gentle side in addition to his more frequently exptressed angry and toughened nature; instinct drives him to protect the weak and his loyalty, if well deserved through respect and affection, is practically boundless.
Hitting Rewind...Born the second son of Satan and therefore the youngest Prince of Hell; his mother was a human who Satan fell in love with, and though she also gave birth to Naoya's older brother Hei, a full demon, somehow her blood bonded with his own and forced him into the life of a half demon, who many of the other creatures of the underworld greatly despised, Hei most of all. Still, Naoya's father believed in him; maybe it was because he shared so much appearance of his mother's, who had never been allowed to travel underneath the surface world she lived in, but still, when Hei was permitted to go to the human land to obtain the Orb of Souls with his brother (despite his obvious hatred of Naoya), the demon was very happy to be accepted by the rest of the underworld community in at least some way. The original plan had been to take the Orb of Souls away from God and the foolish humans, at least until things calmed down enough for the humans to take the orb back. But even though Naoya knew Hei was just using him for bait, when he crept into the village and saw that lovely human face, the boy guarding the orb....the demon fell hard, and fast. At first Naoya went out of his way to make sure he wasn't seen, just so long as the demon was permitted to watch the boy grow up well and careful, but when an accidental slip caused the two to meet for real, Naoya was quite suprised when the boy smiled and invited him to come inside for a meal and some conversation.

That didn't mean Naoya's happiness lasted for long, though; after proclaiming his love for the other boy, who responded just as kindly in turn, Naoya awoke the very next morning to find the guardian of the Orb of Souls laying in a pool of his own blood, lifeless and cold. The rest...well, the rest is a great blurr to Naoya; he recalls the orb breaking into thousands of fragments, and his brother watching him from above a rocky outcropping, and the dull sound of arrowhead meeting flesh, but after that, nothing but darkness. Whatever happened, he's been asleep for a long time, and only now is Naoya finally reawakening.
Tools of the Trade... Naoya always has his sword with him at all times; its massive, and easilly as large as he is, but somehow he's able to swing it around with no issues in the least.
I really enjoy... Sword training, fighting and scrapping.
Love it! Apples, fights, battles and challenges, winning, his mother and full demon form, strong opponents and generally being left alone.
Eew, Nasty! His human form, his older brother Hei, most humans (after all, they pinned him to a freaking tree), losing a fight or challenge, any mention of his past, being unable to protect someone.
Turn it up!
The way it Goes // Gloriana
On my Mind // Cody Simpson
Sssh, don't tell! What if I'll never be as good as my brother? And what if he was right about humans? Did I make a mistake, falling in love with one...?
Am I forgetting something...? Even if there was something, I wouldn't tell you.
I'll deny it! I don't want to talk about that, and it's not any of your business!
My lord, god and master is Yoko_Matsubishi  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. -Buddha"

[Demon Form] [Complete Demon Form]
"Have you eaten yet?"
My name is...... Haruki Yamada
But you can call me... Haruki is fine. Please don't call me Haru- that's a girl's name! Heipacth is the only person who's allowed to even think of weird nicknames, got it?!
I am obviously a... Male
And I look like was born twenty years ago.
Lookhow special I am! Lower Level Half Demon
Keep Swinging... Bi-sexual // Seke, Uke
Puzzle Pieces... [ E ]
Look what I can do! Haruki's skills aren't exactly very strong, especially in terms of control. He's a half-demon in the first place, and so of course most demons don't think much of him. He has two skills that are worth talking about in the first place. One is his ability to summon plants. Yes, plants. Lame, stupid skill. The only time he would even plan on using it would be to produce a large amount of sakura petals to distract some pervert while he makes his escape. It's pointless to make random things grow out of the ground, don't you think? His other skill, which is only active during his full demon form, is the ability to change organic material into pure energy upon touch or sight. Now, this is a rather dangerous ability, mind you, a skill that is hard to control and has the potential to injure Haruki himself instead of harming others. He can only turn organic material (wood, leaves, petals) into pure energy, and he cannot control what kind of energy will be released- heat or light. This skill is more or less controlled by his emotions and not his actual conscious thoughts. And since Haruki doesn't get into his full demon form very often, the development of this skill is still underway.
I can be pretty... Shy, soft-spoken, and observant, Haruki isn't your average bloodthirsty demon. Most demons think he's a darn disgrace to their race because of this, and Haruki has been dealing with that most of his life. The only thing he can do in response to insults is to bow and apologize for being the way he is. Needless to say, he has extremely low self-esteem and doesn't really think of himself as a very useful being. Heipacth seems to be the only one who can remotely understand him, but otherwise... Haruki is always feeling like he's being tossed around like an old rag doll that no one wants. His childhood experiences as a dancer didn't really help this, and to this day Haruki is rather delicate when talking about dancing, especially traditional dances. He has a hard time hiding his emotions, and so it's easy to tell how he's feeling based on his expressions. Haruki isn't much of a talker, but that's only because he never knows what to say in fear of possibly offending others with his words. He's always trying to be considerate and all, but one thing that one should never attempt to do is to take advantage of his goodwill. Haruki won't exactly curse or yell and scream at those who anger him, but his silent fury and gazes should be enough to warn one of what he has the potential to do.
Hitting Rewind... Haruki wasn't really sure who exactly was a human in his family tree. For all he knew, he was born as a half-demon to an old family that had been honored as a full demon heritage, so it's quite a mystery to him. Either way, nearly all his relatives mocked him and thought that he was the single blot on their perfect family tree, so Haruki had been shunned by his grandparents and nearly all his uncles and aunts from a very early age. Even his father would have nothing to do with him, and so at the age of four, he was tossed out of the family estate with his mother, who was practically the only person who thought he was worth something at that point. Penniless and starving, his mother could only do her best to work to keep her son alive and healthy. Working three jobs a day was a huge change from being pampered at the family's estate, so she... well, let's just say that she didn't quite go right in the head and could be considered mentally unstable by the time Haruki turned six. Desperation brought her to sell her son to a local brothel at the age of seven. Thankfully, the owner of the brothel was kind, and the brothel itself was set in a rather wealthy and clean part of the city. One thing that wasn't so nice about this new life was the fact that Haruki had to work for his meals... and being a dancer, he had to dance for his three bowls of rice a day. Now dancing was alright, but when you're seven and had to dance in front of a crowd of men while in traditional Japanese female attire (that's around 4 layers of heavy silk right there), it's not supposed to be good for you. Haruki was more or less scarred for life for the next six years, until one day, he managed to gather enough money to buy himself out of the brothel. At least he wasn't an actual prostitute in the brothel, or his fate might have been a lot worse. However, things seemed to pick up once he left the brothel. In a chance incident at a festival in the demon world, Haruki met Heipacth, and an awkward liking quickly grew into something much more. For once he was needed, understood, useful, and happy. Whatever happiness was to Haruki, however, was slowly starting to slip away as Heipacth dragged him along to obtain the Orb of Souls. Haruki was willing to do practically anything to make Heipacth happy, but... being neglected in a way was a little irritating as well.
Tools of the Trade... Let's see... a fan, slips of paper that he uses to write notes for himself on (he's forgetful, you know), and a sewing kit.
I really enjoy... Though he is indeed a guy, Haruki's habits have been affected greatly by his early childhood days, especially of when his mother used to dress him up for those fancy traditional dances. When he's got the spare time (and believe me, demons have much time on their hands) he reads, or works on some sort of embroidery/sewing project. Not exactly the first choice for a guy, perhaps, but Haruki could care less.
Love it! [ D ], sweet things, peace, quiet places, and his hobbies. He also enjoys being a slacker at times and sleeping at the most inappropriate of times.
Eew, Nasty! Loud noises, dancing (even though he's a great dancer), the color red, and his mother. Goodness knows where she is now.
Turn it up! Snow Kiss - Nirgilis
Sssh, don't tell! Haruki has an immense fear of heights and the dark. Yes, he's a demon, but he can't stand walking alone at night without a friend and a lit lantern. If he were to be exposed to the pitch-black darkness of night
Am I forgetting something...? N/A
I'll deny it! My mate, Heipacth, of course.... b-but, you know, I'm not really good enough for him.
My lord, god and master is Pudding Earl  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"A game such as this? I shall indulge you then."

Demonic form
"Hello, how is your day going so far?"
My name is...... Tsugara Niel Masa
But you can call me... Masa-Sama, Tsu-san, and Tsu(only by his close friends)
I am obviously a... Male
And I was born I look to be around twenty one years ago.
Look how special I am! Full High Level Demon
Keep Swinging... Bi sexual / Seke/Uke
Puzzle Pieces... [E]
Look what I can do! In my full form I tend to hold the record in speed. At least when it comes to being on foot. As for other abilities, I can perform attacks that revolve around illusions in the darkness. Despite my lack of wolf ears I turn into a wolf illusion due to the massive fear of wolves that humans seem to have.
I can be pretty... A lot of people dislike my personality, no matter how foolish I seem to act I always seem to keep my voice calm. And whenever my mouth opens I sound wise, even if it tends to be idiotic statements. I seem to be egotistical among my peers, and I may even brag about my accomplishments. Despite my cocky attitude my pride can be easily damaged and at times I may become possessive and dominant towards others. Though, do not take it personally because I am actually pretty weak through verbal battles. And I even tend to be sensitive around those who have more power than I do. Nevertheless, some people underestimate my strength do to my lack of fighting experience. I am actually very capable of defeating opponents, through my speed and short powerful attacks I surprise others with my massive amounts of powers through short bursts.

Though I have my calming voice and straight face. I am actually very envious of others. I may even become frustrated and angry if I become jealous of someone. I have the desire to be better than those around me. Especially those who are originally better than I am already. This includes my rival one of the more powerful demons.
Hitting Rewind...Explaining my detailed life would take forever to finish. I was born a long time ago and my memory can be very blurry in some cases. However, I do remember that I did have both parents unlike a lot of people. And they were understanding and strict like most demonic parents were as well. I was often playful with other demon children, playing foolish trickery and harsh games on weaker opponents. We were cruel, however, it was our lifestyle and we didn't see much wrong with it. Other then our personalities were filled with pride. Our ego to big for our own good. And I guess someone decided to rain out parade when I was around my teen years. A high level demon had come in and defended one of the half demons and had actually assaulted another demon before peering at me. It was strange and terrifying, and I had ran away before the other could do anything else. I was enticed by his personality however. He was strong willed, and dominant towards those around him. And when people peered at him I became jealous and I soon became slightly obsessed with meeting him. I had the pure desire to defeat this male. And gaining his attention was difficult due to my lack of status. Attempting to please Satan I began to preform difficult acts for him. Working closer and closer to him until i earned his favor earning the other's attention.

This is what began our rivalry. Constantly arguing we began the duel that started such a long time ago. Where I feel the need to continue fighting with the son of Satan to become better than him.
Tools of the Trade... I do not own much, other than a sword given to me by my mother it seems to be the most valuable thing I have.
I really enjoy... Running (relaxing hobby), watching sunsets, play fighting, and naps
Love it! Fresh fish, feeling of silk (guilty pleasure), bullying the weak, and the cold
Eew, Nasty!Water, raw meat (prefers it cooked), the heat, and someone injuring his pride.
Turn it up!Monster by Meg and Dia
A wish by Gregory and the Hawl
Sssh, don't tell! To be forgotten by someone I hold close is something I think about often.
Am I forgetting something...? Though I lack wolf ears like my full demon form my horns are pretty much just for looks and have no meaning in my heritage. If anything they are just a defect to myself. I also hold a lot of wolf like traits.
I'll deny it! Crush? Psh, don't talk about such things.
My lord, god and master is The Invisable Spaz  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

A heart to love, and in that heart, Courage, to make love known

Hello everyone
My name is...... Kuroda, Kitaru
But you can call me... Taru
I am obviously a... guy
And I was born 17 years ago.
Look how special I am! Human
Keep Swinging... Bi-Sexual // Uke
Puzzle Pieces... [ B ]
Look what I can do! I'm a fast runner and an outstanding actor... well, I can act.
I can be pretty... Cocky (yes, I'm not afraid to admit it), I've had everything my way since I was a kid and there's no denying I'm pretty damn successful, I'm very aware of my skills and my qualities and it's really just a side-effect of confidence. Thanks to this I'm not afraid to break the rules or take a risk, even if most of the time it gets my in sticky situations. I'm also very outspoken, it's pretty obvious that I have no shame.
Hitting Rewind...I was born into a wealthy family, it was pretty much the perfect life until I hit seven and my parents decided it would be a brilliant idea to put me in the spotlight. I didn't really have a say in all this, one day I was slobbering on my toy train and the next I was on plastered on a magazine. I've been to countless photo shoots, they've forced into spray tanning and I have to wear the clothes my sponsors send. My contracts dictate my life, things I can and cannot say to the public, the amount of time I have to work and they can alter my appearance to make me look however they want me to. I'm not allowed to dye my hair, get tattoos or piercings like other teenagers because I would wind up in a law suit. I always wondered what my life would be like if none of that had happened, my best friend [C] lives life on his own account and I envy him. I want to write my own script, I don't want my parent's signatures all over my contracts, I just want a quiet life at the temple.
Tools of the Trade... A Samurai Sword... who knows if he'll be able to handle it
I really enjoy... I like to be out, surrounded by people, but sometimes I need some alone time to read a book or enjoy some water colors.
Love it! Large slices of pizza, fun people, walking around the city.
Eew, Nasty! School Uniforms, traffic, photo shoots
Turn it up! Xtatic Truth
Sssh, don't tell! I've never really been into girls, I've cheated on every single one of my girlfriends.
Am I forgetting something...? I have a childish tendency of doing the exact opposite of what I'm told.
I'll deny it! ...
My lord, god and master is Blueberrycondombomb  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"A samurai should always be prepared for death - whether his own or someone else's."
- Stan Sakai

"I will have mercy, and kill you swiftly."
My name is...... Shao-lin Tsubasa
But you can call me... Shao is just fine. Most of my clients simply call me "Demon Slayer'.
I am obviously a... Male
And I was born 22 years ago.
Look how special I am! Human
Keep Swinging... Bi-sexual // Seke
Puzzle Pieces... [ G ]
Look what I can do! Since I make my living as a demon slayer, I am well versed in all forms of demonic combat, including but not limited to how to counteract poisons, weak spots of various entities and some minor exorcism techniques.I am proficient, at least in some extent, with all forms of weaponry, though swords are definately my major focus.
I can be pretty... (Personality; at least a paragraph.)
Hitting Rewind...(Bio. At least a paragraph. Try to make it appropriate for your character. )
Tools of the Trade... (any and all items carried on your person; can either be described, or be displayed with a picture url.)
I really enjoy... My job is my only real hobby.
Love it! (Likes)
Eew, Nasty! (Dislikes)
Turn it up! (Theme song(s) )
Sssh, don't tell! I know my younger brother dislikes me for being so strict about his avoidance of learning the demon slayer craft, but I would die if I knew something had happened to him because he wanted to follow my footsteps.
Am I forgetting something...? (Other, if any. )
I'll deny it! A bit too busy for that sort of thing, don't you think?
My lord, god and master is Yoko_Matsubishi

UC  

[Yoko_Matsubishi]

"They stumble that run fast. - Romeo and Juliet"

".... Were you expecting me to say something of interest...?"
My name is...... Kazuki Mizuda
But you can call me... Kazu... and no, not Ki-chan. Please.
I am obviously a... Male
And I was born Twenty years ago.
Look how special I am! Human
Keep Swinging... Pansexual // Seke, Seme
Puzzle Pieces... [ C ]
Look what I can do! Nothing special to speak of, really..
I can be pretty... Indifferent, unbiased, and inconsiderate are often used to describe me. Why? Well, frankly, I think it's because I don't put much of my effort into anything I do. My studies aren't great because I don't think it's important, my grades aren't as good as they can be simply because I don't spend the time paying attention in class or whatnot. Life is a dull cycle that repeats itself over and over again; it doesn't make much of a difference to me. Of course, there are only two things that hold my interest for a long time, and they are friends and... myths. That's right. I don't spend any time on schoolwork or extracurricular activities because I'm too busy sticking my nose into some dusty corner, looking for that old mythology book filled with legends of lost heroes and the like; that might also explain why I don't have a girlfriend or anything. Personally, I don't care for anything much except for my one passion, and I hope it stays that way. I'm also a huge idiot when it comes to friends- I may not look like it, but I'll follow you like a stupidly loyal dog if you gain my trust and friendship. It's a bad habit, and one I've been meaning to drop as soon as possible, but things often turn out differently than expected. If anything, I think I've trained myself to go slowly so I have some time to react to the unexpected... I'm normally always calm and bordering slap-on boring, but if a slight mention of myths are mentioned, I'll be so energetic you would think that I got possessed by some sort of demon.
Hitting Rewind...Simple life. Simple, stupidly boring life I've had, I think. Average parents with their insanely high expectations of their youngest son... namely me. You see, all my other brothers were all perfect in their eyes. Oldest brother? Damn math genius; I believe he's developing some sort of crazy technology for robots in Japan somewhere. Second brother? He's possibly the world's top athlete when it comes to skiing; I won't mention how large his ego is or how many medals he's gotten. Naturally, I''m a huge disappointment to my parents, and I've given up on all of that since a long time ago. There's just no way I can match up to those two, so I'm just that dark blot on the family tree. The only thing that interests me greatly are stories and fantasy; my parents don't care for that, but as long as I have my friends, everything should be fine. I could care less what they want.
Tools of the Trade... Some dusty old book, candy, and a knife. Threatening people is fun.
I really enjoy... Reading, writing, avoiding my parents, hanging out with friends, and being a total weirdo when it comes to legends.
Love it! Friends, myths, legends, reading
Eew, Nasty! Parents, studying, schoolwork
Turn it up! Doubt and Trust - Access
Sssh, don't tell! I don't like facing challenges. If anything, running away is an awesome idea. Yes, I'm a coward! Now you better shut up about it, too!
Am I forgetting something...? That eyepatch/bandage you see up there? Yeah. I'm a clumsy guy, you would never have guessed.
I'll deny it! Now don't be ridiculous!
My lord, god and master is Pudding Earl