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Minato Arisato x Mitsuru Kirijo - He literally gave up his life to protect her, and then came back from the dead to be with her. When's the wedding?

Naoto Shirogane x Kanji Tatsumi - These two are so sweet and adorable together, and they've been that way since this whole 'The Golden' thing began! That's not going to change any time soon...

Sai Sakurazaka x Suzume Kirihara - No matter where they are, no matter what world they are in, no matter what trials he may have to overcome...Sai and Suzu will always be together. In this world, the next world...they are the ultimate OTP and I love them so, so much!

Kaori Sakurazaka x Munakata Kei - They complete one another in a way that I truly envy...she makes him feel human and he makes her feel like she's not alone. Putting everything else aside, that makes the two of them absolutely essential to one another...

Junpei Iori x Fuuka Yamagishi - It's been really charming to watch how responsibility has forced the two of them not only to step up to be the leaders that their charges need them to be...but it's forced them to confront the fact that their feelings for one another are unavoidable. It's the worst-kept secret in the Okina City Dorm that the two of them are or will soon be together...they should just give up the whole 'different rooms' act and start making heirs already, like Lord Seo and...and...

Seo Taihaku x Yasuko Taihaku - Oh God! Lord Seo and...I had a...a...Nar...!? *blushfaintdies*

Rednal x Yuno x Aselia - The only real OT3 on the list, it was cuter when it was just Rednal and Aselia, but if the yandere angle isn't going anywhere, it's impossible to just ignore the impact that Yuno has had not only on this trio, but on other relationships as a result of this. And Rednal does seem to treat them about as well as could be expected, so...I still think he's a wannabe player. *huffs*

Nia Ueda x Nito Nekata - I don't know whether the self-proclaimed 'Jakken Kuzunoha' is the biggest idiot in Japan or an idiot savant! Either way, without Nia watching over him I'm sure he'd be in a sea monster's stomach somewhere already, so yeah, I'd say they pretty much deserve on another...and I mean it in the best way possible. They are too cute.

Jo(Shu) Michieru x Saiga Giriko or Kanade Tachibana - Last year's list had Shu listed alone with Saiga, but I think that was a mistake! Kanade and Shu make such a cute pair together, and I'd rather see her with him than back in that toxic relationship with Rednal and his so-called 'harem'. Jo(Shu) just needs to get his s**t together and make a decision on who he wants to spend his life with, because if he'd acted like such a horn dog in the future at our estate...we'd have fed his you-know-what to the lesser oni long ago.

Haruto Mashiba x Noelle Everett - These two are so colorful and good together that I can't even imagine the two of them with anyone else. From their love-hate chemistry to the sexual tension that always exists between them, you know that even when she's about to DESTROY him...they're both smiling on the inside.

Soji Seta x Yukiko Amagi or Rise Kujikawa - Another year, another missed opportunity to end the ambiguity here. He deserves a chance to make a choice, damn it! And they deserve to not be kept hanging!

Miran Froaude x Jun Otsuka - These two do things that make me blush just thinking about it...I can't even think of these two and then Lord Seo...and...and...me...doing the s-same...*blushes hard*

Minori Koroko x Amagai Genji - A wonderful example of high school sweethearts who have become closer through such a normal, modern means...but this isn't just puppy love, instead, I think we're seeing the beginning of a romance that will stand the test of time. They are kids who are too mature for their age not to be thinking of the future, and I just know that the future for each one of them must include the other!

Hatsu Harima x Seika Murakami - Through the worst of times and the best of times, ever since they met on that fateful day back in ENDGAME, these two have propped one another up and made two damaged and incomplete people whole. They've made one another better by being together, and that's the mark of a couple that belongs together...

Shiranui Amaterasu x Rorek Viral-Taihaku - As if I couldn't pair together the parents of dear San! She's too precious! And anybody who looks after N-Narue is fine by me...

Sera Makushima x Koichi Mori - He saved her life when he brought her to the Tokyo base with Cesc and the others, and he saved her again when he lead her and the others to the past after 6 months of training to traverse the Corridor. But where the romance really bloomed was in the moments between those two...when meeting behind closed doors, being interrupted by a vengeful and possessive cat who surprised even the Shogun...the found something to keep fighting for in one another in the most dire of worlds.

Touma Makushima x Luvia Anegakoji - Who would have thought that rebel drummer would find a girl who could challenge him and maintain his interest past the first night? But then, there's a girl in the previous pair that's kind of proof of concept for these two, huh?

Jurou Kikuno x Elena Wakahisa - Lazy days around the apartment and cuddles on the couch, these two have found a peaceful life and happiness together that I dream of one day...give or take some clan hunting and battles back in Kyushu from time-to-time...but that doesn't mean I wouldn't mind spending a day alone with L-Lord Seo...

Kiyone Tabata x Yoshi Motoya - All I wanna do is see you turn into a giant woman,
A giant woman!
All I wanna be is someone who gets to see a giant woman.
All I wanna do is help you turn into a giant woman,
A giant woman!
All I wanna be is someone who gets to see a giant woman.
Oh I know it'll be great and I just can't wait to see the person you are together.
If you give it a chance you can do a huge dance because you are a giant woman.
You might even like being together and if you don't it won't be forever.
But if it were me, I'd really wanna be a giant woman,
a giant woman!
All I wanna do is see you turn into a giant woman~




Gin Mishima x Nix Gallen - They met on the racetrack, but their relationship has barely gotten past the starting line! Can we just get a date between these two already and make it super-official?

Yuuya Kuniohara x Nym - They really do deserve one another.

Faust Necromonium x Eoria Ansul - Who else is it going to be, really? He dumped the girl we all thought he belonged with, so I suppose he must be content with the summoner-who-would-be-his-wife, right? And they are adorable together...the way he cares for her shows the goodness at the core of his heart. Or maybe I'm just a romantic. ...Don't ever call me a romantic.

Haoul Yamakiji x Claire Ferris - Proof of concept future children aside, she's always been there for him even in the darkest of times...and together, she feels stronger and he feels more at peace with himself than any other time. That tells me that these two belong together...now, or in the Bad future.

Estellise Udonge x Amina - You can't fake the concern and affection these two show to one another even on the battlefield. I, for one, support this beautiful, youthful relationship!

Aeon Fabregas x Narue Taihaku - I was skeptical at first when I heard how close they were, and even more skeptical when I saw what a...colorful person he was. But the way that she perks up when he is near, the way they talk to one another, I can't help but think that it's all worth it having him near her. And without him, my d-daughter would never have been here...so, Aeon...thank you. Always.

Yasumoto Kensu x Mei Hanako - His determination and her caring heart have often belied the gentle care that Kensu offers and Mei's steadfast will to stand on her own two feet. They are not opposites...they are people who are strong and capable and caring in their own right, and they work together in a way that makes them both stronger...both as one and on their own.

Akane Sakisaka x Yasuo Utsumi - He practically lives for her and one day, you have to hope she will see it. I know from experience...it's easy to live in the dark, but it's so much nicer when there's something bright and warm to hold onto...right, Lord S-seo...? *hides face*

Noa Winters x Vale Lampard - She's a fast moving heavy-metal queen and he's as cool a customer as they come. But when the time comes to lay it all on the line, he burns with a flame hotter than imagination and that matches her breakneck pace just fine. Which doesn't mean she can't slow down long enough to spend some quality time back at the Yellow Dragon with her partner...unwinding, talking, and who knows what else together. It's a bond that goes deeper than the job, and that's just wonderful.

Kumori Oniko x Sinbad Kuatsumo - W-well they made Amina together, right? He's the rock that she can lean on, and she...well, she's the softer side of things that helps remind him he's more than just a soldier.

Cesc Fabregas x Aishe - I don't care if it wasn't this time's version, or if he was the reason I got to see Narue in this time...after what he did to her in that dream, I will never forgive him. But...I guess without these two together...Aeon wouldn't be here. One day, though...I will rip out his throat with my own two hands, I swear...

Kuzaku Martillo x Kawari Chishio - It may have taken two and a half years longer, but she made it back to him after all...a sweet reunion, a sweeter relationship. His chivalry and her colorful nature make them a pair to watch for future 'Cutest Couple' awards down the road!

Anzu Munakata x Inigo Tsukira Shimazu - I wouldn't say this is necessarily official as far as anyone knows, but my inside sources tell me there's more than just a mutual respect between these two. I always love a good love conspiracy...or, well...I mean! ...Leave me alone! I'm shipping! *pouts and shakes fist*




Zeo Kirijo x All the Ladies - See? This is the very definition of a crack pairing...as in it will never happen. But if things ever hit the rocks between Gin and Nix, well...I think he's got a real shot!

Kyuzo Rikkio x WYNN - He's a wandering warrior from 'Sapporo?' and she probably has GPS! But more than that, they're both people looking for a place in the world and have complicated relationships with their "brother"...one being that he may not even know he has one (or is it the other way around?) and the other that she totally wants to give him her robot body. Let's get away from that, though, and acknowledge that they are stronger together than they would be apart...and he might even find his way home!

Sensuke Tarumohara x Morgan Trutina - He's the leader of a small-time band, but she could teach him a thing or two about leadership. And with her willingness to look past the exterior and see to the heart of others, to accept them for who they are...for the content of their heart...there's grounds for her to see the truth of the decent person that he is. And maybe...so long as she never sees his strange Shadow World...that might blossom into something more?

Itachi Kishikido x Gwendolyn - He's a cop that's actually a villain and she's a gangster that dresses like a prostitute and...um...you're right, maybe I am drunk and should go home...how did this happen?!

Shinpachi Saito x Lira Chronicle - The hints are all there, from his careful watching over her to the way she tried to protect him to him being the person she turns to for comfort after the incident and whenever the nightmares become too real. The question is just how deep Saito actually sees their relationship going...is it a dear friendship forged through the trauma of that night, or is there something more?

Tsuyoshi Nishijo x Chiyo Tachibana - One day, she's going to beat him back into line in spite of his laziness. And on that day, she will finally be able to definitively tell Mechanical Voice-kun that they weren't meant to be...

Izuru Shimazu x Tsuki - They have a kid together in the future, even if they don't know it. Futurebabies must mean something, right?

Titus Martillo x Al Azif - Speaking of futurebabies...but seriously, he's willing to throw away 200 years of loyalty, friendship, service, and meaning in his life for a girl he met barely yesterday. Casting side the idea of working from the inside to change things, of reasoning with the new man in charge, or anything of the like. She must be worth something significant to him, right?

Jian Lin Kuei x Aoshiki - Of all the girls in the Lin Kuei and all the floozies that come in and out of his bar, none of them have ever measured up in terms of beauty or pure cruelty and appeal to the Starless Dragon than the Yuki-Onna. Just don't ever expect too much out of them as a couple...Jian isn't known for his loyalty.

Genzo Komaba x Arisu - So many near-misses, but I'm not giving up on this idea. It's too cute...why can't they just meet up?!

Aigis x Shinjiro Aragaki - I always felt like there was a touch of destiny about Shinji's story when I first heard about what SEES accomplished nearly 3 years ago now...he wasn't even supposed to be a part of that team, but he showed up and made himself one in spite of that. He suffered, he made mistakes, but people gravitated towards him anyway...and he gravitated towards them. And he was there that night because of it, he died because of it...and if anybody can relate to that feeling of destiny, of having a purpose in life and escaping it to do what you wanted to do, it would be the anti-shadow weapon AIGIS. She thought her life was pointless after she failed against Ryoji, but here she is, years later...living her life again. The two of them can relate to one another in ways no one else can...maybe...just maybe that means something?

Yosuke Hanamura x Chie Satonaka - Maybe? I guess...I don't even know anymore...

Kansei Ribasu x Shingo Surabashi - All the hints of potential chemistry are there, we only need to get them into the same cafe or room now so we can make the magic happen! Break through the walls, Shingo!

Pyrrha x Zorc James the 4th - I NOPE'd this so hard it actually turned the corner, circled around, and sneaked back onto the list! Seriously, how did this get here?!

Chiaki Urakami x Miyata Ito - They were pledged to be married not so long ago, and when he fell into the darkness of the Messengers she followed him to pursue her own desires. And I think we can guess from the context that one of those desires is the mischievous eyes of the boy who calls himself 'God's Last Gift'. Pretentious nickname, but he isn't hard on the eyes...

Rhys Merlo x Aurica Velraine - She's already got him carrying her bags, right? He's practically whipped! Might as well make it official.

ERGO x Clara Lille - Two hacker spies being creepy hacker spies together. Don't mind me while I slash your every connection to the internet...

Bel Heartilly x Iofiel - This one really hurt to put on the list because I know how San feels about Bel, but...if he's hugging this girl all the time, like I hear he is, then it's really cut and dry, isn't it?

Sreze x Naomi Martillo - I stand by last year's decision...he's put so much of his life into her, that you almost want to root for him. Maybe one day, she'll come around?

Mikoto Hageshii x Mirai Hatto - They survived that haunted house together, didn't they?

Leonardo Mori x Maria Geneas - Leon is a good man who has gone to dark places to combat the evil things in Inaba, but the erstwhile MAGES may have the imagination, earnest fortitude, and the heart to soothe the demons brewing inside of him. He needs that purity...he needs that fun in his life again. Maybe she can provide it?

Lord Ryugetsei Iyokono x Ryofu - The only way I can see that big, stupid dragon in a relationship is if someone goes up onto that big old hoard of gold to woo him on it. And who better to do that than a beautiful young dragoness? There's so much dragon in this relationship even Yoko would be jealous!

Sorata Asakura x Ikumi Mikoshiba - She's confessed once and come up a cropper, but then, watching the two of them interact together, doesn't it feel like there's more to their relationship than meets the eye? Maybe if she gives it a second go...just work up the nerve, Ikumi!

Nylock Doragoon x Aiko Koisuru - Red String Special!

Mao x Ruri Konpeki - Red String Special!

Hiro Akatsuki x Justitia - Red String Special!

Taichi "Rabbit" Sawamura x Youmu Konpaku - He's the adorable superstar of the famous band 'Tartarus' and she's just a girl, standing in front of a boy, trying to decide whether to kiss him or hit him with her sword. He might be incorrigible, but then...maybe she's the one?

Rolles Royce x Sophia Ulrich - First of the two Royce brothers, he and Sophia are of a similar rank and share concerns. As with a couple other pairs on this board, their stations in the Embryon and attitudes make them an interesting duo which can prop up and support one another unlike anyone else on the list.

Reisu Raida x Hibari Usugu - If she gives him her underwear like someone else I know of, then this relationship could be going places fast. Places we don't want to know about...

Rorion Royce x Rosa Hanasaku - What's red and white on red and white? Give up? A candy cane on top of another candy cane! ...What were you thinking of? I know her being Miss Peppermint and all might have made you think of something else, but that's not my game! That's yours! Perv...

Tarkus x Juuni Neptunia - An old-fashioned warrior who rarely speaks paired together with a new-age heroine with a penchant for dynamic entries. Her energy and verbose nature can fill in the gaps in his silent badass facade! They are compliments, opposites, and in my opinion, an undeniably adorable pair...

Negima Ryouko x Gokuborii Underwood - An adorable bug-lover and one of the smallest and most normal members of the Embryon. They would take an absolutely squee-inducing picture together! Can we please put them together? Pretty please?

Ailek Mymariel x Benkyou Resolvere - He may have given up on humanity, but he's still got a lot to prove...just like Benkyou, whose frustration with the Yatagarasu could lead her to turn to someone with answers outside of her usual view to find them.

Sano Gallen x Murasaki Gathielle - She loves to sleep and he puts people to sleep...forever! What's not to love about this wild, crack pairing? Plus she's got that blue Gallen hair, so...she's already fit for joining the family!

Suigetsu Mizuiro x Yoshida "Rainbow" Rinku - One can go either way and the other goes...well, the other way. And since they're already working together, who knows where that 'relationship' will go in the future?

Holly Wulff x Woodcock the Shooter - When you go around cosplaying Little Red Riding Hood, you should expect the creepers to come out.

Boudica Tlalli x Fujimatsu - She's weird and he's on fire. I don't know why this is a thing, but let's move on, all right?

Tezuka Rembrii x Serina Leaf - She's a young lady whose work in a restaurant during the Holy Grail War set a mature tone for her that anyone looking to be with her would have to live up to. Tezuka, lovable loser that he is, has a surprisingly deep view of things due to his own troubles. These two peaceful, decent souls perhaps might find some common ground, something that allows them to better discover their inner peace together than they ever could one their own...a true harmonious relationship.

Colm Watanabi x Rosaline Miina - He loves women and she's kind of like the elder stateswoman amongst the SEES-2 team, right? She's a bombshell that's right up his alley in terms of taste, and if we're assuming that he's not just going to marry up with his demon Shiva, Rose (who has been trapped in Inaba before when she should have been living in Iwatodai) has an interesting perspective on his own temporary imprisonment in the dormitory that provides a common ground for the two that others may not share. It isn't much, but it's a seed...and a seed, when nourished, may grow into something beautiful...

Kosuke Ishida x Niiya Honya - It's the story as old as time, the innocent girl nearly corrupted by the pervert before she fights back and they find a middle ground. I've seen it a lot of times in those Hollywood movies...err...not that I watch those or anything!

Mijiyou Harusuhei x Miwako Kondo - She's the serious one and he's the one who makes everyone laugh. Sometimes you need someone as extreme on the far end to counterweight your own extremity. They compliment each other really well, I think.

Iggy Sentsubon x Shikage Ryouko - He smokes too much and she's too cool for school. I always look at them and think, "They'd look so cute together."

Eido Aeroda x Kuuyan Dereheart - Eido's not exactly what we think of as a lucky guy. Therefore it only stands to reason that his first run-in with love would end up seeing him get in WAY over his head. Dealing with such a forceful female personality would result in some hilarious hijinks I think we all want to see...but in the end, perhaps, it would end with a surprising coda...love.

Tharros Gallen x Yukari Takeba - Continuing the joke from last year's list, I couldn't help but find the humor in it...but since Colm's gone this year, I guess that just leaves the guy who can't find his way out of a wet paper bag and the girl who can't seem to catch a break in love! Will he wander his way into her heart, somehow?

Arimina Wolfgang x Misha Mori - An unrepentant stalker and an unabashed pervert, the two have more in common than first meets the eye and makes them an interesting and compatible duo! As long as it keeps them far away from me and mine...

Ciela Kuzunoha x Asuka Bokuro - I couldn't really continue from that boy's list last year the relationship between Asuka and Kyouji since Asuka's really spent more time focusing on her original master again. But these two have a good enough rapport that it's easy to see them settling into some kind of comfortable relationship together sooner or later!

Fate Lembryant x Tripidium Yamakaji - Two more the friendlier, more fun-loving members of the Bad Future Band. Seeing the two of them together would spark more than fireworks...it would be like setting loose a two-person rock band on the entire world!

Rirouku Muramaro x Haruka Falcom - Two people who have experienced severe trauma as the result of the attack of Kise, they are nonetheless upbeat in personality and goodhearted fanboys/girls of their own respective forms of entertainment. With an interesting style of fashion for the both of them and plenty of opportunities to meet in the dorms, could love be in the air when these two get some time alone together?

Venustus Michieru x Surripio Rembrii - A charismatic member of the future children and one of the stronger travelers through time with the soft-spoken daughter of the Guild's most notoriously lovable Loser. He might be charming and she might be a dork, but that's just the sort of romance that makes for the best novels!

Zaitou Hanako x Patris Michieru - He's too blind to see the blood on her hands! Or the emptiness in her eyes after she kills everyone they hold dear...

Akira Pravum x Rena Redeyan - The best part about these two is that she's the Black Messiah and he still might be the bigger jerk!

Ragna Ketsuki x Minene Tenshiko - Two Lieutenants who are quite serious about their work; bonding on the job and while on break gives them an ideal perspective into the troubles each face every day. It's a chance to learn about one another, spend time together, and support one another...even if they're Embryon, I guess they deserve that much.

Emil Dekoda x Chiharu Chiyoko - The warm, caring Ensign of Embryon may be one of the more responsible members of her unit, but even she needs support sometimes from someone who is caring, considerate, and who actually takes her seriously. Emil may be young, but he has all the tenderness and decency necessary to provide just what 'Chi Chi' needs in order to thrive.

Mashiro Munakata x Kyouji Kuzunoha - Keep in mind that this is the Crack section, as I call into question the 'Kyle Reese Corollary'. The Kyle Reese Corollary States that if a much younger person from the future comes back in time and meets a person that they knew of in the future, but did not personally spend time with in said future, that any relationship between them can be viewed on its own merits so long as there is no relation between the two in any way. Don't you remember the Terminator? When he goes back in time and loves Sarah Conner because he saw her picture in the future and then got to know her when he went back in time to protect her? What if, like, Mashiro had Kyouji's picture? She was a legend in the Resistance, after all...just...just shut up! Terminator was a great movie! >///<

Jokura Sakayuri x Aka Yuuki - They started off on the right food, at least, and now there's a chance for Aka to judge him on his own merits as a person instead of the ridiculous B-grade Zeo-impression he's been doing with every other girl around town. These are two people who deserve to be happy, so why not together?!

Mataki Hito x Amelia Heartilly - They need to get together and have Bel just so I can prove to Lord Seo that he's not ours, already! ><;

Naraku Entsu 'Nalkrein' x Momoko Hudamora - It's the Reverse Kyle Reese Corollary! ...I SAID TERMINATOR WAS A GOOD MOVIE DON'T QUESTION ME!

Minohiko Tsuneshi x Misara Celestine - I just...I just think they look good together, all right?! Sue me! They could probably get up to some interesting mischief together.

Noir x Tsuru - She's endlessly hopeful and he's always trying to help! Together, they could save the world...or destroy it.

Rayne Paik x Kaminari Miyaki - She's always been a girl of unusual taste, and judging from the stories I heard about Rayne, he's just the kind of unusual taste she might acquire. With all of his explosive personality and her receptiveness to others, maybe they could Make it Rayne together! ...Rayne love, I mean, not...not...get your minds out of the gutter!

Adell x Ellie Troit - She's the heroine we deserve and he's a hero with a decent head on his shoulders, unlike his out-of-his-mind brother, Mao. Together with his restraint and her power, they could make for a fabulous gender-reversed Batman and Robin-esque team-up on the battlefield...with a little bit of Batman and Catwoman off-the-battlefield for good measure!

Weston Smith x Sylphie (when both are of age) - I'm not even going to touch on all the symbolism of the way she holds her evoker or his dirty habits...I'm just going to point out that she seems to have a thing for bad boys (if lingering references to Nyx's Drummer mean anything) which could transfer onto her teammate that's currently wishing her luck one day. Maybe she's a bit too young for now, but the age difference isn't much and 18 isn't too far away...maybe down the road, we can call this a 'Predict the Future' forecast, huh?

Garry Iblis x Sanae Kochiya - Two of the warmest, more caring people in all of Inaba joining together to make the world a better place! They've both had their traumas in the past, but the future would be brighter for the both of them if they stuck together!





Men
Teddie - "As if this pervy bear had a shot."
Aleister Crowley - "Between love lost and his...um...out-of-place nature, it's hard to imagine."
Nora Keruberosu - "Doesn't know what love is."
Yairotsu Kaijin Taihaku - "Is a ghost and a creeper."
Amonius Sutaka - "Still in love with a girl he put in a coma..."
Nagito Komaeda - "Lost all hope."
Zero - "Is a robot."
Yuriy Valkov - "Will literally eat you."
Loki - "Will probably seduce you, then kill you."
Fenrir - "Has no interest in this thing you call 'love'."
Jormungandr - "Will also literally eat you, but with a moody, teenage angst."
Feid Shindeki and Takato Shimakaze - "You've got to have more personality if you want to win over a girl. More screen time will get you paired next year!"
Motonari Mori - "Busy running a country."
Cid Raines - "Busy looking like he's running a country."
Dracule Mihawk - "Is, in a way, a holy man."
Ebiro Uyahara - "Is a zombie. Will also literally eat you, probably."
Kyoki - "Would rather bathe in your blood."
Zolf J. Kimblee - "Would probably be the guy making your blood rain like a shower for Kyoki's shower."
Kiki-Jiki - "Will literally eat you (if you are a demon)."
Louis Cypher - "Seriously, do you REALLY need to ask why LUCIFER isn't on my list for lovers?"
Izarasha Xazozhal - "I don't know who this person is."
Naniyori - "Will literally get drunk, burn a liquor store, and then kill you."
Wei Zhijun - "Remember when I said Kyoki would bathe in your blood? This guy has too much fun making that blood go boom."
Geist 'The Magnificent' - "Being ridiculously magnificent."
Genesis Rhapsodos - "Too busy reciting poetry."
Takaya Sakaki - "Nyx is his copilot."
Raiden - "His love is Soji's misery."
Reisuke Oshaleon - "A kid. Also a date with death."
Sentaku Toriyama - "How do I NOPE thee? Let me count the ways..."
Mithos Seinaru - "Bit too black of soul for love."
Kabuto Yakushi - "Too busy being snakey for love."
Vamp - "Creepy as all get-out."
Orochi-Hetero - "Will kill you and tear out your shadow for power."
Akaito Modoku - "He was blinded with science."
Fonias Lekes - "Pretty sure he thinks love is stupid."
Kazuma Koroko - "He's not even around anymore. And if he was, I'd probably ship him with his sis-con obsession with Minori."
Nagamasa Nekata - "Don't really know this person yet."
Nagisa Nekata - "Don't really know this person yet. x2"
Nala Nekata - "Don't really know this person yet. x3"
Akifusa Akechi - "More likely to kill you than kiss you."
Dakuraku Ogigayatsu - "He's a d**k."
Hikashi Zusyotsu - "In love with a spider-lady who is going to eat him one day. What a dork."
Tatsumaki Kikai - "I'm not dating anyone wearing that hat."
Gabi - "He's oooooold. And hairy. He's pretty cool, though."
King Leo - "I'm still trying to figure out how he got a job with the freaking Embryon!"
Kurou T. Hand - "Not that he isn't of age or willing, but what girl is going to look at him and not think, 'If I date him, everyone's going to think I'm a predator.', right?"
Hei Nanjou - "He's got 99 problems but your girl ain't one."
Kabuto Kirisaki - "He needs some down time first. Being the eyes of the Avengers isn't easy."
Juugo Kirikaze - "An older man, he's certainly attractive for his age...but old pains probably make this unrealistic."
Koji Mori - "I'll put him in the ground if he comes near my daughter..."
Akihiko Sanada - "Romantic as I'm sure a relationship would be, he's got to keep his eyes on the prize right now. I'm betting on him against other members of the clan in his upcoming title fight!"
Saizou Kirigakure - "Too busy keeping Lord Ryuga in check."
Riphal Edea - "Maybe after the war."
Sieg Shimazu - "Still pining after his brother's girl. ...Yeah, he's kind of weird. I hate the Shimazu..."
Raven Gallen - "This old man is ooold. Plus I think Tharros would knock his block off if he brought a girl home."
Hayatobimaru - "Loves his work too much."
Izaya Amatsu - "He's a person of mass destruction and not someone most girls would venture to get close to. And the only one he was interested in, well..."
Gyuki - "I've lived with the Clan for years now and he still makes me nervous..."
Honto-Teki-Taihaku - "Honto's not bad, but he needs to get out more, meet new people outside the clan. N-not that I'm one to talk, but I like to stay at home to be near Lord S-s...! Shut up!"
Yukio - "Um...is he a new guy?"
Dakota Curtiss - "CHOO CHOOOOO! ...I don't like this person."
Malik Suna - "Does Malik x the sun count as a ship?"
Wayato Kogane - "OH MY GOD, what is that on his FACE?! He's so...UGLY!"
Kai "Raidou" Kuzunoha - "Hahahaha...no."
Shay Takeda - "Loves treasure too much."
Ishimaru Oowada - "Loves school environments, rules, and homoerotic sauna contests too much."
Cassim El-Amin - Too busy contemplating jihad against the Western Powers.
Ringo Kakuyami - "Old. As. Baaaaaallls."
Ken Amada - "Young. As. ...Someonenotoldenoughtoshipyet."
Shikitaro Surabashi - "In line for a horrifying fate...in one future, at least."
Balmung of the Azure Sky - "Doing hero stuff."
Henry Plagia - "Blood is his OTL."
Javik Pendergast - "His butt tattoo is too baller for this list. ...Don't ask who told me to say that."
Denmark - "I don't know if he IS more likely to kill you than kiss you...but that just gives me all the more reason to nope him right to this list."

Women
San Viral-Taihaku - San is precious, but I heard Bel's always hugging that Io girl. I hope I'm wrong...you can do it, San!
Ren/Ran Kukuraku Iyokono - "Too unpredictable to ship."
Tsukiyo Hanabi - "Again, a literal ghost."
Zaid - "Again, a literal zombie. Who will literally eat you."
Futaba Kongiku - "Is there a person TO ship behind that enormous cleavage? I mean, have some self-respect..."
Kogata Ibuki - "Same idea as Futaba, except at least she wears decent clothes. ...I'm not jealous!"
Tear Hemels - "Has literally sworn off love for power."
Ennea - "The idea that she reproduced in that bad future deeply disturbs me."
Aina Toukame, Yorika Shimakaze, Sayuri Misaka - "Leaving these three off was tough because there's nothing wrong with them, but there just weren't enough decent men to go around. ...Figures, right?"
Amora Necromonium - "Too busy creepin' on her daddy."
Reina Udonge - "It would be a biohazard for someone to be shipped with her. I won't be responsible for the STDpocalypse."
Ambriel - "A literal angel. This is impossible."
Cheryl Vonvitch - "For the God-knows how many-th time, a literal zombie. Who will literally eat you."
Flandre Scarlet - "A literal...just...what the HELL is this unholy thing?!"
Kisa - "Too obsessed with power."
Korina Yamaka - "A literal murderer and worse. Don't let this wolf in sheep's clothing fool you..."
Loa Recctear - "I refuse to ship this on principle."
Maeko - "A priestess. Self-explanatory."
Natsume Nekata - "Don't know enough about this person yet. x4"
Namiie Nekata - "Don't know enough about this person yet. x5"
Nanase Nekata - "Don't know enough about this person yet. x6"
Renko Hikawa - "I don't know who this person is."
Sapphire Karakuri - "A literal robot."
Kimiko Lin Kuei - "A loli assassinshutupI'mnotalolitoo!"
Yura Ketsueki - "She seems to have a single-target sexuality. In this case, it makes her even less shippable."
Yelizaveta Ivanovna - "Does she look interested to you? (No, no she doesn't. Leave her alone, Zorc.)"
Hel - "Would literally kill you with a touch."
Shizuka Myuute - "Loves books more than people."
Fina-Res Taihaku - "Will literally eat you...because she doesn't know better."
Tyria Harvestasha - "Loves bread more than you."
Marie Kasumi - "A literal goddess with an electric crush on Soji Seta..."
Seneca Daidouji - "Not in a coma anymore, but yet to actually speak. Wait 'til next year?"
May Misoragi - "The sea is her OTL."
Miira Rukiora - "Machines are her OTL."
Lu - "Still pining over Balmung."
Kin Hiragi - "More likely to suck your blood...or pretend to."
Mokou - "Too busy trying hopelessly to depose the Shogun and her distant cousin Cid. As if we'd let her."
Yui Takahashi - "She's lost her faith in people...that won't be easy to get back. I know..."
Emila Tsumaya - "Pretty plainly evil."
Emanda Katerine - "Like, super evil. Anybody who spells 'Amanda' as 'Emanda' has no soul."
Hifumi Tsubasa - "I don't know who this person is."
Ria - "'Blind date? Sorry, I've got a swimsuit calendar to do...' ...Right?"
Dolus Michieru - "I can only use the Kyle Reese Corollary so many times..."
Euphoria Ak'thias - "It's meant to be an exception, not a rule."
Relika Ak'thias - "That doesn't mean these girls don't deserve love, because they totally do!"
Aiken Aeroda - "Probably more so than the dork dads who made them, in some...specific cases."
Cinnabuns Necromonium - "...Is her name REALLY Cinnabuns?"


Everyone Else!