They just bring up all these stories that they think are all funny but frankly I'd rather not have them laugh and make a mockery of me and how i react.
I tried to keep myself restrained but no matter how much i told them to shutup they kept laughing and made an even bigger joke of how i react. so I got fed up and started making my way to my room to get my headphones so i didn't have to listen to their stupidity but they just got even more obnoxious. That's when I couldn't contain myself. I shouted above them all "******** OFF, PLEASE!!!!" and then I went to get my headphones and came back here... so...... ugh... I hate how they think my anger and my depression are so funny.
My mom cracks jokes about my suicide attempt the one night whenever the topic is brought up and it makes me want to just down half a bottle of whiskey and pour a bottle of pain killers in my mouth and say "Look mother!!! I'm NOT just looking for attention!!!!" She thinks I'm just like her when she was a teen. Only when I used to get suicidal (which I'm not anymore) I would seriously want to die. It wasn't about attention. The problem wasn't that I wasn't noticed. The problem was that I wasn't left alone! I hated that nobody would treat me like a human ******** being so why the ******** would I want to be around them if they were just going to sympathize me and immediately after i was through my depression they'd go back to treating me like s**t.
Actually... that specific suicide attempt was in the midst of a huge breakdown. I lost 80% of my friends because they were all insensitive pricks and didn't want to be around me. That's when I just didn't want to have to deal with all the horrible truth that was happening in my life.
But now.... i'm happy with my life.... just... at the moment, I'm pissed off because of the obnoxious family I have to cope with...
The Emo Guild
What do you think genius? Its a guild for emo's.
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