How To Be Teh Perfect Asian

[t0shi0]

This ish all based on stereotypes, don't hurt meh. ><

How to be a Perfect Asian Kid
(from the first generation perspective)
1. Score a perfect 1600 on the SAT.
2. Play the violin or piano on the level of a concert performer.
3. Apply to and be accepted by 27 colleges.
4. Go to an Ivy League university and win enough scholarship money to pay for it.
5. Have four hobbies: studying, studying, violin/piano, and studying.
6. Love classical music and detest talking on the telephone.
7. Become a Westinghouse, Presidential and eventually a Rhodes Scholar.
8. Aspire to be a brain surgeon.
9. Marry an Asian-American doctor and have perfect, successful children (grandkids for ah-ma and ah-ba!).
10. Love to hear stories about your parents' childhood...especially the one about walking 20 miles to school without shoes.



How to be the Perfect Asian American Parent
(from the second generation perspective)
1. Be a little more lenient on the 7:00 p.m. curfew.
2. Don't ask where the other point went when your child comes home with 99 percent grade on his/her report card.
3. Don't "ai-yah" loudly at your kid's dress habits.
4. Don't blatantly hint about the merits of Habadu (Harvard),Yeil (Yale), or Purinsuton (Princeton).
5. Don't reveal all the intimate details of your kid's life to the entire Asian community.
6. Don't ask your child, "What are you going to do with your life?" if he/she majors in a non-science field.
7. Don't give your son a bowl haircut or your daughter two acres of bangs.
8. Don't try to set your kid up on a date in anticipation of their poor taste or inept social skills.
9. Incorporate other phrases besides, "Did you study yet?" into your daily conversations with your children.
10. Don't ask all your kid's friends over the age of 21 if they have a boy/girlfriend yet.


------

Ones Tosh finds true.

Asian Kid:
2. You won't believe how many times my parents asked me to play the piano. >.>
10. It's always about their harsh life. Jesus, I don't care!

Asian Parent:
4. I just find the accent amusing. xD
5. I swear, she tells like all her friends about me! >.>

------

For more stereotype funnies, visit:
http://www.texaschapbookpress.com/magellanslog17/asianstereotypes.htm

 

[` T a p i o c a `]

I'll do it later, right now I have to go to my grans for my brothers b'day party >_>;;

 

[stupidmama21]

I got 2700 on my SAT sweatdrop Adn I don't play an instrument. xp I sing 3nodding

Edit: I'm sorry I meant 1700 xp  

[x_Eternal_Ice_x]

There's no possible way to get a 2700...and those are so true. They're not ALL stereotypes..my parents are like that...*sigh*  

[sasa_powa_4eva]

I don't play any instrument, I don't know how to swim, I don't know how to bike... I'm surely not a typical asian!  

[Tokioka]

I'm not very 'asian' at all, but I still go bright red whenever I'm even slightly drunk. stare Pssht, stupid blood.  

[Flammable Bait]

I wouldnt say 'asian' and i dont at all like the term 'asian'

But i'am chinese.  

[t0shi0]

sasa_powa_4eva

I don't play any instrument, I don't know how to swim, I don't know how to bike... I'm surely not a typical asian!

Wah.

I'm the same. @_<

'Cept, I can ride a bike.

But my dad's always going on and on about how I should learn to swim. Yeesh. >.>

 

[xiiao-ai]

Oh Emm Eff Gee!! Lookie!

Sin used to play the piano.

But she sucked at it and quit.

;D

As for college and jobs and such..

Sin is too stupid to be accepted by any of them.

o_o'

I'm decorating the post like everyone else!

 

[` T a p i o c a `]

How to be a Perfect Asian Kid
(from the first generation perspective)

1. Score a perfect 1600 on the SAT. <--I don't get 100% but near 100% ^_^;;

2. Play the violin or piano on the level of a concert performer. <-- I don't even have confidence to play a solo in my school concerts @_@ And I'm only on grade 4!!! Plus I play a flute instead

3. Apply to and be accepted by 27 colleges. <-- That has not been done yet, plus parents don't even think about it

4. Go to an Ivy League university and win enough scholarship money to pay for it. <--Ivy League Uni? What?

5. Have four hobbies: studying, studying, violin/piano, and studying. <--I hate studying mad

6. Love classical music and detest talking on the telephone. <--Classical music isn't my most favourite genre, but it is one of my favourites and yes I hate talking in the phone ¬_¬ So this is sorta true

7. Become a Westinghouse, Presidential and eventually a Rhodes Scholar. <--What the heck? o_O

8. Aspire to be a brain surgeon. <--What? No way!

9. Marry an Asian-American doctor and have perfect, successful children (grandkids for ah-ma and ah-ba!). <--*cough*I'm in England*cough* And I don't care who I marry I don't even wanna think about it stare

10. Love to hear stories about your parents' childhood...especially the one about walking 20 miles to school without shoes.<--Well I enjoy some but some of em I don't really give a crud! So stop complaining!

So yeah, I'm not the perfect asian since I got...2.5/10

How to be the Perfect Asian American Parent
(from the second generation perspective)

1. Be a little more lenient on the 7:00 p.m. curfew. <--eh?

2. Don't ask where the other point went when your child comes home with 99 percent grade on his/her report card. My parents does this all the time, they go "You could've got more if only you got your butt off the computer!"

3. Don't "ai-yah" loudly at your kid's dress habits. My mum does this all the time! gonk She goes "OMFG, your dress style is soooo Lo tou" and I'm like "Shut Up!" mad

4. Don't blatantly hint about the merits of Habadu (Harvard),Yeil (Yale), or Purinsuton (Princeton). <-- they wish I could become some kind of doctor/dentist or any other carrer that pays a lot from attending such Uni's rolleyes

5. Don't reveal all the intimate details of your kid's life to the entire Asian community. <-- my mum does this to all my relatives, she goes blabbering about how useless I am at home stare

6. Don't ask your child, "What are you going to do with your life?" if he/she majors in a non-science field. <--my parents attempt to do that sometimes stare

7. Don't give your son a bowl haircut or your daughter two acres of bangs.<-- my parents always wanted me to keep my bangs! Because they think I look like an ugly old granny without my bangs and extremely short hair stare I had bowl cut hair shape when I was young stare

8. Don't try to set your kid up on a date in anticipation of their poor taste or inept social skills. You won't believe how much my parents nag me on about this type of thing, they go "Why don't you talk when you're out of the house?!?!?! Talk to your cousins like mad dammit!" scream Maybe its because I have nothing to talk about to my cousins or I don't feel like it stare

9. Incorporate other phrases besides, "Did you study yet?" into your daily conversations with your children. <-- my mum does that, she thinks that I spend most of my time on the pc now that I don't even study/revise for tests!

10. Don't ask all your kid's friends over the age of 21 if they have a boy/girlfriend yet.<-- my parents wants me to get a chinese bf if I don't have a bf for ages stare not a viet bf, because they think Viet males in Vietnam are abusive rolleyes

So my parents aren't the perfect Asian parents in the world, who could blame them? rolleyes

 

[Niphredil Ithilmir]

Oh I LOVE it.. so true so true.. 3nodding xd  

[[Bab! Co.]]

I'll do it later...I love these things! Hehe~  

[fuyubear]

tehehe i didnt read it x_x too lazy  

[Rosamaine]

Oh my...my parents fit in all the stuff there. O___O

My parents are the "perfect" Asian parents. gonk  

[soumakisa]

kinda true... my mom dont expect me to be perfect..

but then again.. she always compare me to others - her friend's children or to herself when she was at my age...

and yeah.. she talks about me to her friends about bad points, etc.. >.>

she made me learn the piano at the age of three..

i cant really swim either.. but was forced to learn in school in Australia..
managed to float and swim.. but have no stamina.. sweatdrop