Sky scraper

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Sky Scraper.

Standing at the edge, I can see everything, the people look like ants to me, and I must look like nothing to them, they can’t see me. They never did. I was always just somebody with his head in the sky, so far out there that nothing could bring me back, nothing. ‘He’s just daydreaming, let him be.’ ‘I wonder what could be going on in that head of his.’… I think it was a miracle to them that I ever spoke, they have no clue, that there’s something more, anything more. They complained about how I never ate, but it never made me lose weight, I was never hungry, never tired, though I could stay in the same spot for hours, wide-awake. "It's all in your mind..." I'd convince myself, and with my understanding of the world, I could stop all the pain, the hunger, the fatigue I could stop anything that could ever hurt me... My world is perfect. Everyone is happy, pain is the most unfamilliar concept in my world; ignorance is bliss and everyone realizes that, everyone is aware, everyone is truly awake... Unlike this world, living day to day, worrying about debts and loans and limits and boundaries... I wonder how anyone can survive living like this.

Fifty floors down the streets are busy, day in and day out. I question whether anyone ever takes the time to slow down, to just imagine that they are happy. It’s always ‘I’ve got to pay my taxes.’ ‘Got to get to work on time or the boss will freak’ ‘I’ve got twenty minutes to meet up with my friends or they’ll leave without me.’ But I don’t think anyone in this city has ever asked “Am I happy? Could there be something more then just structure and rules.” They don’t even realize that there is something more, and they don’t need to do anything to find it… They just need to slow down and look deep within themselves, to a place or a time, when they are happy. I can go for days, being happy, without guidance, without rules, I don’t even have to move in this so-called “Reality”. If you’ve ever heard the term “It’s all in their head” someone is usually referring to a person in the sense that they are delusional… Delusion is a clever disguise for enlightenment. To be able to see what others can't, it's not a disease, it's a blessing... To be able to see within another world, to see through the eyes delusion, to see that everything is relative, and if I can see something that you cannot, does it mean that it isnt there? Or does it mean that you arent looking hard enough?

The time has now come that take my step… I can feel a gust of wind brush past me, pushing against me, trying to stop me. Unlike anything I’ve ever thought, I can’t see the ground getting closer; I can’t see people looking up to see a plummeting me. The wind is no longer there; I can’t even pinpoint the feeling. Euphoria. It is the only word I can use to describe it. Everything around me is numb, but this warm, happy feeling is growing from deep within me and I can’t help but smile.

I’m not scared, I’m never scared, I don’t think I ever experienced fear, everything was intriguing to me, I was always curious. But so distanced from the world that I seemed to be clueless… This isn’t a coward’s way out, “suicide”… For me, it’s only the next step in my journey, one that will seemingly last forever…  

[Renton Noah]

Well that was a new point of view, I never heard or actually never seen it writing that way. Very interesting writing you have there my friend.  

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Renton Noah

Well that was a new point of view, I never heard or actually never seen it writing that way. Very interesting writing you have there my friend.

Though this is reply is long overdue, thank you very much.  

[KirbyVictorious]

I wish I could live like this...I dream of it all the time. Maybe I could be as happy then....

Jumping off a building sounds pretty nice right now.  

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Often when things are tough people try for an escape into their own mind. I try to toy with the idea of mind over matter in alot of my writing. The original idea of this came from a potentially dangerous situation that I decided to expand on later.  

[KirbyVictorious]

*nodnod*

the dangerous thing is when you can't get out of your own mind.  

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Yep Yep.

The situation in question was when a friend was on the wrong medication, they were so involved in their own thought process and curiosity that almost became a danger to themselves.  

[KirbyVictorious]

Oh. That makes sense.

Still...was he happier that way?  

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Not really, he talked to his doctor and they switched medications. He was happier after that though.  

[KirbyVictorious]

Oh good.  

[Oukow]

I usaully ask myself if I'm happy whenever I get the chance. And overall, yes..If I wished for a different life, for all I know it could be horrifing.....
I'd love to always stay in my own world, but doing that would make it difficult if the time came that I had to face reality... But whenever I think about it, reality and one's own world...they don't have to be seperate things if you try, can't they?...
I've lately been wondering...If a person wants to die, why do people try to stop them? It's their decision and it doesn't seem to be wrong, though it does hurt others.
When ever I think of my own death, it usually envolves me falling off a building, or out of a window... But it seems more like I'm just flying, and when I do hit the ground I'll just be able to sleep...  

[Galladonsfire]

I enjoyed the beginning two paragraphs I could really relate to that. Then the ending with suicide kinda threw me off. Its good thinking like that, yet... I wonder how one thinks that suicide isn't a cowards way out.... It'll be another mystery of life I should solve. neutral  

[[.Disposable Dweeb.]]

Well, when looking at it, a person's mentality towards death can vary from person to person. Where one might think killing themselves is a cowards way out of life, another may think it's the next step into the afterlife (Or the next step to seeing if there even is one.)  

[Galladonsfire]

Good point; however, why even make the false presumptions. I also found intrest in how you said if there even is one... Yet, daring to go to the beyond when so many questions are left unsolved...