Strange Horse Laws
Just some wacky, odd, strange laws from around the US (and a few from other countries too!).
The horse is New Jersey's state animal.
It's illegal in Marion, South Carolina, to tickle a female under her chin with a feather duster to get her attention while she's riding a horse.
In New York City, it is illegal to open or close an umbrella in the presence of a horse.
It is illegal to fish from horseback in Washington D.C, Colorado, and Utah.
Tennessee prohibits riders from lassoing fish.
A British law states that an Englishman must not sell a horse to a Scotsman.
Horses are required to wear hats in hot weather in Rasario, Argentina.
A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
In Guernee, Illinois, it is illegal for women weighing more than 200 pounds to ride horses in shorts.
In Kentucky, it is illegal for a woman to appear in a bathing suit on a highway unless she is: escorted by at least two police officers; armed with a club; or lighter than 90 pounds or heavier than 200 pounds. The ordinance also specifically exempts female horses from such restrictions.
In London, England, law required taxi drivers to carry a bale of hay on top of their caps to feed their horses. The law was in force until 1976.
In Arizona, it is illegal for cowboys to walk through a hotel lobby wearing their spurs.
In Raton, New Mexico, it is illegal for a woman to ride horseback down a public street with a kimono on.
In South Carolina, it is legal for adult males to discharge firearms when approaching an intersection in a non-horse vehicle to warn oncoming horse traffic.
A misworded ordinance in Wolf Point, Montana: "No horse shall be allowed in public without its owner wearing a halter."
In South Carolina, no horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants.
In Omega, New Mexico, every woman must "be found to be wearing a corset" when riding a horse in public! A doctor is required to inspect each woman to make sure that she is complying with the law.
Pennsylvania law states: ``Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. If the horses appear skittish, the motorist must take his car apart, piece by piece, and hide it under the nearest bushes.''
In Hartsville, Illinois, you can be arrested for riding an ugly horse.
In the state of Queensland, Australia, it is still constitutional law that all pubs (hotel/bar) must have a railing outside for patrons to tie up their horse.
Pattonsburg, Missouri, Revised Ordinances, 1884: "No person shall hallo, shout, bawl, scream, use profane language, dance, sing, whoop, quarrel, or make any unusual noise or sound in such manner as to disturb a horse."
Abilene, Kansas, City Ordinance 349 declares: "Any person who shall in the city of Abilene shoot at a horse with any concealed or unconcealed bean snapper or like article, shall upon conviction, be fined."
Marshalltown, Iowa, it is against the law for a horse to eat a fire hydrant.
All I need to know in life I learned from my horse:
When in doubt, run far, far away.
You can never have too many treats.
Passing gas in public is nothing to be ashamed of.
New shoes are an absolute necessity every 6 weeks.
Ignore cues. They're just a prompt to do more work.
Everyone loves a good, wet, slobbery kiss.
Never run when you can jog. Never jog when you can walk. And never walk when you can stand still.
Heaven is eating at least 10 hours a day... and then sleeping the rest.
Eat plenty of roughage.
Great legs and a nice rear will get you anywhere. Big, brown eyes help too.
When you want your way, stomp hard on the nearest foot.
In times of crisis, take a poop.
Act dumb when faced with a task you don't want to do.
Follow the herd. That way, you can't be singled out to take the blame.
A swift kick in the butt will get anyone's attention.
Love those who love you back, especially if they have something good to eat.
HONEST HARRY'S NEW & USED HORSES
I can save you money on gas!
Alright folks, step right up! You don't want to pay $4.69 for gas, no problem, I have the perfect vehicle for you. Needs no gas, no oil, or even a battery, just a little grass and water will do these animals fine. Now everyone has different needs, so choose from the following models:
1. Trail Horse - Your average run around town animal. Has the energy to get where you are going, the brain to find the best way to go, big enough to carry the normal sized American.
2. The Arabian - perfect for those who travel long distances in a day and try to multi task while driving. Although the Arabian may not go to your home or office with out specific instruction, it WILL go somewhere.
3. The Draft - Calling all soccer moms. This big guy can carry the whole team, their gear and snacks. Just like the big machines, this guy will require more fuel, and his shoes will be more expensive than the compact model.
4. The Western Pleasure - The right car for the high end white collar workers. This animal works harder and requires more special knowledge so only the best can figure this out. Be sure to take your cell phone. You won't be stuck in traffic, you just won't be getting anywhere fast.
5. The Parelli - Salesmen, stay at home moms, and high school kids will all enjoy this dream. You can load him down with flapping Wal-mart bags, ask him to walk in places a horse won't fit, and you can dance with him as you listen to the latest tunes.
6. The Ranch - The most dependable animal available. He will go where ever you ask him to, at whatever speed is appropriate. You can tie him to the stop sign and he will be there when you get back. Best of all, this model has been specially engineered to be able to go without water for days and stay fat and slick by eating sagebrush and dead prairie grass.
Of course all models are available in base colors (sorrel, bay, black) Special order colors are available (dun, gray, palomino) and for an additional fee, custom paint jobs are also available (overo, tobiano, blanket, leopard).
No horse is sold with a warranty, however maintenance plans are available in the event brakes, steering, or accelerator fail.
Crazy Crosses
After somebody told me their Tennessee Walker/Friesian colt was called a "Walking Freezer", I thought, why not come up with some other strange breed crosses?
Quarter Horse X Halflinger = Three-Quarter Horse
Mustang X Bashkir= Mustache
Vlaamperd X Shire = Vampire
Quarter horse X Warmblood= warm horse
Foxtrotter X Irish Hunter= fox hunter
Arabian X Xilingol= Arab Lingo
suggestions:: Orlov Trotter x Appaloosa = Trapper
Halflinger X Warmblood = Half Warm
Shire X Fallabella = Shy Fella
Fell Pony X Don = Fell Do'n
Westphalian+Gypsy Vanner = Westphalia Van
Paint X Palomino = Paint Pal
Halflinger + Jutland= Half Jug
Missouri Foxtotter X Miniature Horse= Mini Fox
Fjord Pony X Gypsy Vanner = Ford Van
Icelandic X Hackney = Ice-Hack
Oldenburg X Westphalian = Old West
Saddlebred X Appaloosa= Saddle-loosa
Brabant X Friesian= Antifreeze
Florida Cracker X Paint = Floor Paint, or Cracked Paint
Appaloosa X Danish Warmblood = Apple Danish
Mustang X Friesian= Must Freeze
Friesian x Warmblood = Freezing Blood
Halflinger x Quarter= Half Quart
Mustang X Friesian= Must Freeze
Oldenburg+Saddlebred= Old Saddle
Quarter Horse+Buckskin=Quarter Buck, Horseskin
Thoroughbred+Suffolk=Rough Folk
Gotland X Appaloosa = Gotloose
Ardennaise X Noma =- Nomayonnaise
Pinto X Warmblood - Pint Blood
Welsh X Shetland = Wetland
Are you a stall-bound horse? Want to amuse yourself and your human? Well, here are some fun activities for you!
1) Poop in the water game
This will test your coordination and spatial abilities. Horses all over the world practice this, every day. You must try to poop in your water container (note: drink water first, so you won't go thirsty!). If your water container is too high to poop in, you can attempt to poop on the stall's door, or on the wall. This also gives your human something to do-- when they see what you've done, they will marvel at your special abilities, then happily provide you with fresh water.
2)Pee in the water game
A real challenge for geldings and stallions! Attempt to pee in your water container. This is a very challenging game. If your water container is up against a wall, you may try to drag it into the middle of your stall. Either way, be sure that you've mastered #1 above first... so your human knows to provide fresh water for you!
3) Artistic Wood Carving
You can become a wood carver. Use your teeth to chisle the wood of your stall into a beautiful piece of art! At first, you can start with simple shapes -- such as the half-moon bite shape-- and as you become more advanced you can try different forms (big curve shape or multiple bite shapes). Your human will really appreciate this.
Some humans will actually remove your artwork from the stall, and put up fresh, new, unchewed boards-- encouraging you to develop your artistic abilities with a fresh, new canvas!
4) Grain Spilling Game
Try to dump out all of your grain from your grain bucket/container, by turning it over with your nose. It is a fun game. You can even continue to flip the container to be sure that all the grain is dumped on the ground. Then, using your delicate muzzle to guide you, try to pick up all the grain, sorting throught the bedding and poop. Amusing, and it makes your grain last longer. Your human will appreciate it too-- he/she may even bring you a new bucket of grain, or challenge you to become better by using more difficult containers.
5) Hay Dunking
In this game, you'll try to grab a bite of hay, carry it to your water container, and dump it in. Dropping hay in your water is fun for both you and your human! Although it's just hay, they will probably come in your stall and remove it from your water (then you can dump more in).
6) Who Can Be The Loudest
If you're stalled with other horses, try a little friendly competition with this game. When it's feeding time, see who can neigh, bang, scream, and kick the loudest in their stalls. Humans will instinctively throw food to the noisiest, most demanding horse, so try to be it. The winner is the horse that the human feeds first.
7) Smoosh The Bedding
In this game, you can attempt to mix your bedding, poop, and hay all together. You do this by walking all around in your stall, until you get a good, even mixture. Some horses walk in circles, or back and forth in a straight line... experiment with different styles to see what you like best. Again, this provides entertainment and excersize for your human, because they will have to clean it all up.
cool Roll in the stall
Attempt to get a good roll, in your stall. If your stall is big, this is easy; however, the smaller the stall, the more difficult it can become. The object is to roll, well, without getting stuck. There is some danger involved in this game, as you could roll up near a wall and get stuck (but then, your human will rescue you-- be sure to do this near food time just in case!).
9) Mane Rubbing
Try to rub your mane out in certain spots. Humans like neat manes. That is why they comb, spray, and pull your mane; Save them work by pulling your mane yourself! You can stick your head through the stall (if it has an opening) and try to rub the top of your neck. Or, just rub it on the side of a wall. This will give your mane a nice look that humans appreciate (clumps of hair missing). You'll save them time on having to pull your mane or trim a bridle path.
The Sheath Cleaning Song
Author Unknown
Sing it to the tune of "Hello Mother, Hello Father" from camp song
How's it hangin'?
So much cleaner.
Aren't you glad I
washed your wiener?
I'll admit it's
kinda creepy
that I had to stick my arm up in your pee-pee.
It was sticky.
It was gunky.
It felt icky.
It smelled funky.
It was cruddy,
it was crusty--
when you stuck it out, it creaked like it was rusty.
After half an
hour of toilin'
and of squirtin'
baby oil in,
you're as fresh there
as a daisy.
Either this means I love you or else I'm crazy!!!
Husbands Vs. Horses
Author unknown
Good Things About Husbands:
Husbands are less expensive to shoe.
Feeding a husband doesn't require anything that even mildly compares with the hassle of putting up hay.
A lame husband can still work.
A husband with a belly-ache doesn't have to be walked.
Husbands don't try to scratch their heads on your back.
They're better able to understand puns.
If they're playing hard to catch you *may* be able to run them down on foot.
They know their name.
They pay their own bills.
They apologize when they step on your toes.
They seldom refuse to get in the vehicle.
They don't panic, yelling and running all through the house when you leave them alone. (unless you left the kids too)
For a nominal fee you can hire someone else to clip them.
The Horse's Advantage:
If they don't work out you can sell them.
They don't come with in-laws.
You don't have to worry about your children looking like them.
You never have to iron their saddle pads.
If you get too fat for one you can shop for a bigger one.
They smell good when they sweat.
You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape.
It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence".
You can force them to stay in good physical condition...with a whip if necessary.
They don't want their turn at the computer.
They turn white with age, but not bald.
They learn to accept restraint.
They don't care what you look like, as long as you have a carrot.
Don't say around non-horse people....
Horse people... don't say these in public; Sure, you're just talking about horses or horse stuff.... but non-horse people may get the wrong idea and become confused, embarrassed, or afraid of you.
Do you like my breast collar?
His sheath was really dirty, but I cleaned it.
In the winter, his a** gets really hairy.
Don't jump on him, sit down gently.
What a lovely Jackass!
She wants to breed to my stud.
There's nothing like 17 hands between you legs!
Can I pet your a**?
He had a bad attitude, so we castrated him.
He's got a lot of stamina, you can ride him all day long.
Is she a maiden?
I wanted to breed to her stud, but he's all booked this season.
We'll be breeding tonight, want to watch?
He's really good at walking and pooping at the same time.
He didn't try to run away when we drove the nails into his feet.
He broke his leg, so they shot him.
She bites her baby if it behaves badly.
She's on a new diet, she's only eating grass.
She just got a new rack.
If he's not good, just grab his lip and twist it.
When I'm done riding him, you can have a turn.
They cut his toe off and he walks better now.
Don't worry, if he pulls her teats too hard she'll bite him.
He's much better if you ride him with a crop.
I jumped 4 feet high yesterday.
She's got a really nice, big, square butt.
What color are her gums?
The mother is black and the father is white, and the baby came out black and white.
He tries to kick me when I put my hand in his sheath.
Don't worry, it's normal for his mouth to foam.
All of her babies have been sold overseas.
I know she's going to have a baby soon because her butt is soft.
Her baby started walking about 20 minutes after birth.
Her body was covered in 4-inch long hair, but I clipped it off.
He has trouble mounting her because she's so tall.
She likes to roll in the dirt after her bath.
He has 23 kids by different mothers.
He goes outside in just a blanket.
He was about 6 months old when we branded him with an iron.
I have to use a stool to mount him.
If he's spilling his food on the ground, he might need a dentist.
I was listening to his gut sounds last night...
One testicle is visible, but I can't even feel the other one.
You know you're a horse person when.......
You cluck to your car when you go up a hill.
Your horse's hair is in better condition than your own.
You refer to your car as "my portable tack room."
You are excited when your friend tells you that there is a huge sale at the bridle shop, then you are disappointed when you realize they mean the bridal shop.
You have the vet's number but not your kid's pediatrician on your speed dial.
Your spouse can track dirt into the house all they want, but God help them if they muddy up the tack room.
Your house is a mess, but the barn is as neat as a pin.
Your nice clothes are the ones without horsehair all over them.
You have to go to your friend's wedding in riding clothes because you took too long at the barn.
MURPHY'S HORSE LAWS
There is no such thing as a sterile barn cat.
No one ever notices how you ride until you fall off.
The least useful horse in your barn will eat the most, require shoes every four weeks and need the vet at least once a month.
A horse's misbehavior will be in direct proportion to the number of people who are watching.
Your favorite tack always gets chewed on, and your new blanket gets torn.
Tack you hate will never wear out and blankets you hate cannot be destroyed.
Horses you hate cannot be sold and will outlive you.
Clipper blades will become dull when your horse is half clipped.
If you approach within 50 feet of your barn in clean clothes, you will get dirty.
The number of horses you own will increase to the number of stalls in your barn.
Your barn will fall down without baling twine.
Hoof picks always run a way from home.
If you fall off, you will land on the site of your most recent injury.
If you are winning, then quit, because there is only one way to go. Down!
There was a preacher who was trying to sell his horse. A man stopped by to see how the horse rode. The preacher told the man that instead of saying, “walk", say, “praise the Lord,” and instead of saying, “whoa,” say, “amen.” So the man got on the horse and said, “praise the Lord,” and the horse started to walk. The man then said, “praise the Lord,” again and the horse started to trot. He said it a few more times, then the horse started galloping. Suddenly a cliff appeared. The man yelled "Whoa!". The horse didn't stop. He tried yelling al sorts of things, and he tried to pull the horse up, but it wouldn't stop. Then suddenly he remembered what to say. The man said, “amen.” The horse stopped right before they fell off. The man was so releived that he put his hand on his forehead and then said, ”Praise the Lord.”
Seller's Terms...what they say & what they mean...
Some of these have been collected off the 'net or sent in by veiwers, and others I've thought of. Hope you get alot of laughs!
Big Trot: can't canter within a 2 mile straightaway
Nicely Started: we can lounge him, but we don't have enough insurance to ride him yet
Top Show Horse: won a reserve championship 5 years ago at a show with unusual low entries due to a hurricane
Home Bred: knows nothing except being raised on the front porch
Recently Vetted: someone else found something badly wrong with the horse
Big Boned: good thing horse has mane & tail or he would be mistaken for a cow
Doing Courses: when tranqualized to the eyeballs & lunged 6 hrs straight before hand
Well Mannered: hasn't stepped on, bitten, or kicked anyone for a week
Professionally Trained: hasn't stepped, bitten, or kicked anyone for a month
Should Mature 16 hands: currently 13h, dam is 14.3hh, sire is 15hh, every horse in pedigree back 18 generations is under 15h but this horse will definitely defy his DNA
To Good Home Only: not really for sale unless you can 1) pay twice what he is worth, 2) allow current owner to tuck in beddy - bye every night, 3) are willing to sign a 10 page legal document
Bold: runaway
Athletic: He's a runaway, but he looks good doing it
Needs intermediate Rider: runaway
Needs Experienced Rider: "dead" runaway
Dead Quiet: just dead
Started O/F: Started overfeeding because we can't ride
No Vices: especially when he wears his muzzle
Light Cribber: we can't afford to build any more barns & fences for the buzz saw
No Time For Him: he's lucky to be fed
Excellent Disposition: never been out of his stall
Clips, hauls, and Loads: Clippity, clippity is the sound his hooves make when he hauls a$$ across the parking lot when you try to load him
Great Halter Prospect: Bred for beauty, not for brains
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Selling due to divorce: My spouse certaintly couldn't stand him...
Bomb Proof: So dumb you could set off a bomb under his tail and he wouldn't blink.
Good Mother: She's too dumb to do anything else.
He Can Do It All: bite, kick, buck, rear...
Flasy: nice looking... forget about him being rideable
Stunning: you'll be stunned at his kicking power
Very Brave: even a whip can't force him back
Slight Case Of Navicular: better buy him before he's too lame to walk
Proven Sire: The mare we bred him to had a baby
Lots of Potential: Under the right circumstances, you migh be able to ride him
Great Bloodlines: He can't do anything, but that's okay becuase some horse 20 generations back did something
Already Broke: two fences, one arm, six buckets
Got Cow Sense: he'll attack any cattle within a 5-mile radius
Unregistered: probably stolen
Protective Mother: don't even think about going near the foal
Lady's Horse: Perfectly sweet with women, but will kill men
Good Disposition: The only good thing about him
Selling Due to Retirement: he's making us old
Started Good: we quit while we were ahead
Started: we quit while we were still alive
Loud Color: we spray painted him bright red
Really Broke: literally
Slight Nervouse Habit: he shakes and has muscles ticks anytime anyone asks him to think
Great Stud: breeding is the only thing he's good at
Anyone Can Ride: as long as they have the right protective gear, they will survive
Smooth: you won't notice he's bucking until you're on the ground!
Event Prospect: Big, Fast Horse
Dressage Prospect: Big, Slow Horse
Hack Prospect: Pretty Color
Sporting Prospect: Short, Fast Horse
Camp Prospect: Fast Horse which can turn
Endurance Prospect: Fast Horse which will turn sometimes
Flashy: White Socks
Attractive: Bay
15.2hh: 14.3hh
16.2hh: 15.3hh
To Loving Home Only: Expensive
To Show Home Only: Very Expensive
Needs Experienced Rider: Potentially Lethal
Elegant: Thin
In Good Condition: Foundered
Free Moving: Bolts
Quiet: Lame in Both Front Legs
Dead Quiet: Lame in All Four Legs
Good in Traffic (Bombproof): Lame all Round, Deaf and Blind
Loves Children: Kicks and Bites
Pony Type: Small and Hairy
Arab Type:Looks startled
TB Type: Looks Terrified
Quarter Horse Type: Chunky
Halter Horse Type: Fat
Warmblood Type: Big and Hairy
Draught Type: Big and Exceedingly Hairy
Easy to Catch: Very Old
Must Sell: Wife has left home and taking kids
All Offers Considered: I am in Traction for 6 months
Good Jumper prospect: Looks great jumping over the pasture fence, if you can ever catch'im, you might just have yourself a great jumper!
Top 10 Spookey Things
A horse's point of view
10. Blowing Paper:
"At any moment it could whip up into our faces, covering our noses. We could suffocate. And don't try to tell us you'd do CPR."
9. Barking Dogs:
"What? You've never read Steven King's CUJO?"
8. Puddles of Water:
"Quicksand."
7. Trash Cans:
"They've been known to swallow horses and transport them into another dimension."
6. Babies and Li'l Kids:
"Long lost tribe of horse-eating pygmies."
5. Plaid Horse Blankets:
"Hey, when was the last time you wore plaid? It adds 100 lbs."
4. Ropes and Hoses on the Ground:
"Dreaded North American Trail Snakes."
3. Ponies:
"Cute, cleaver, hardy. They want to take over the world."
2. Windy Days:
"Two Words: impending tornado."
1. Carts and Wagons:
"Look. You put a human on our backs, we can always buck them off. But hitching a horse to a wheeled object? It's just not right."
Signs Your An Equestrian College Student
by Annamaria Tadlock
I wrote this after viewing some of the "you know you're a horse person" type jokes. Most of the following are true for me, or other college students I know smile
You wonder why people complain about having to get up so early for a
9am class. You feel like saying, "Try getting up at 4am on weekends
for horse shows!".
- Your papers for your writing classes contain stories of horses.
- When people complain about an instructor being cruel and too hard,
you think of the riding instructor's youve had... the ones who made
you run the barrels on foot, jump bareback, or ride backwards to
improve your balance...
- Your social life consists of chatting with people at horse shows.
Or, chatting with them on The Ultimate Horse Site.
- If you have a MySpace, it includes more photos of horses than of you.
- You accept MySpace friends instantly if they have a picture of a horse in their profile.
- You've added Ultimate Horse Site to your MySpace Friends: http://myspace.com/ultimatehorse
- You wonder why people buy energy drinks to get through their
classes, when you've spent early-mornings loading up horse trailers,
pulled all-nighters watching colicing horses, and afternoons grooming
horses for hours... on an empty stomach. And all they need to do is
sit still and stay awake...
- You need a break from school work so you visit The Ultimate Horse
Site to see if there are any updates.
- Your idea of a perfect boyfriend , besides being sweet, smart, and
caring, and all that -- is one who can fix stalls, muck barns, and
enjoys riding on the beach.
- You haven't been on a date in a long time and you think you'll
probably end up marrying a farrier or a vet (since they are the people
you see most often).
- In a human genetics class, you often ask things like, "Does it work
like that in horses too?"
- Your instructor doesn't remember your name but calls you "the horse person".
- In American History class, you often ask, "What was the name of his horse?"
- When you write papers for history classes, you always mention the
horses and their contributions to society.
- You get excited in an English Literature class when you come across
material about horses.
- You've asked the engineering students to calculate the wingspan of a
hypothetically functional pegasus (still waiting on the answer to that
one...)
- You'd totally take the art class if, instead of sculpting a nude
model, you practiced creating horses.
- You write a movie review for literature class on Henry V and
conclude it by analyzing the horsemanship.
- You see a cute guy and think, "I wonder what he'd look like in Wranglers..."
- You ask your history teacher what the most important animal in
history is and then argue with him that it was the horse.
- You don't have a boyfriend/girlfriend because you spend all your
spare time with your horses.
- You can spend an hour discussing horses with an instructor or
classmates, but not politics or sociology.
- Your idea of a controversial issue is NAIS, horse slaughter, or
mustang management.
- You don't understand mini-skirts or high-heeled shoes.
- When someone complains of having to make a long drive for a few
hours, you smile and think of the time you drove 9 hrs to a clinic, or
2 days to make it to a horse event.
- You have horse doodles in your notebooks.
- You think the cafeteria isn't THAT bad; You've had much worse
horse-show-stand food.
- You see a girl wearing a pair of high-heeled, pointy-toed
fashionable boots and when she tells you how much they cost you say,
"Wow, you could have bought a nice pair of REAL boots for that!"
- Your classmates/friends have referred to you as "horse lady",
"cowboy", "horse guy", etc.
- You end up driving your friends everywhere because your big truck
can fit them all.
- You've had to explain to said friends what some of the objects in
your truck are; "That's a hoofpick..." "Umm, those leather strips are
reins..."
- You invite all your friends to come riding with you.
- This is all assuming you HAVE any friends because your horse takes
up so much time...
- You've answered your cell phone while riding before and had to tell
someone, "Hold on a second, my horse is being a brat".
- The vet's number is programmed into your cell phone.
- You can't understand how people sleep till noon on the weekends;
what a waste of productive early-morning time!
- You can't understand why people can talk about cars for hours, but
someone asks about your horse and you can't shut up
- You've spent more than an hour talking to someone at school about horses.
- You've spent more than an hour talking to an instructor about horses.
- You've walked up to strangers and joined in conversations because
you heard them mention horses.
- You tell your friends you can't make it because the farrier is
coming and for a second don't realize why they look at you funny ("Oh,
the farrier is a person who puts shoes on a horse..." wink
- You frequently have to explain things to your non-horsey friends;
"No, a pony is NOT a baby horse"; "A farrier has nothing to do with
faries"; "When I said I was training a stud, I meant a horse, stupid!"
- You are one of the few people who can talk about whips, spurs, and
leather and not think anything kinky.
- Your arms and face are tanned, but your legs aren't.
- You love the smell of horses, leather, and hay, but you've learned
not to say that because people look at you weird...
- You've called your horse your boyfriend/girlfriend
- Your friends are going to a party over the weekend, but you can't
make it because you have to go muck stalls and move sawdust with the
tractor.
- You've spent calculus class explaining the barrel pattern to a
friend and making them draw it.
- You've asked instructors to write a letter of recommendation for
you-- because you're applying for a horse scholarship.
- You've asked an instructor if you could bring a horse to class for
your presentation (in my case... they said yes!).
- You've skipped class for a horse event.
- Your research papers are about horses.
- You've cited UltimateHorseSite.com in a bibliography.
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My Life
I'm a girl that plans on puting the lyrics to her fave songs in here. But evey now and then put some random BS or peoms and maybe some stories.
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User Comments: [1]