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I'm kinda dreading Valentine's Day now. Me, Pat, and Brendan were hanging out at the table during lunch, and I brought up Valentine's Day and said how I couldn't wait for it. Then Pat got a panic-esque look on his face, and I knew that he hadn't even thought about it. I mean, a week later is our six-month! So, I'm prepared for a little bit of disappointment. v_v Nothing new, though. Whenever I was with somebody on Valentine's Day, I never got anything. But whatever. I'm pretty much prepared for that happening to me for the rest of my life.
So. I don't have much to say right now. I brought my guitar to school with me yesterday, and everybody was like, "ZOMG. IT'S PURPLE." It was funny. ^-^ So in fourth block, after I finished all my work, I played my guitar for the remaining fifty or so minutes. It was entertaining to me. I'm not going to complain. Oh! I will complain about this. My Biology teacher, Mr. Wade, is a d**k. I asked him if I could put my books away [they're so ******** heavy] because I have a heavy back pack and a heavy guitar, too. He said, "Only if you're willing to stay five minutes after class." Yeah, and miss the bus? No thanks. d**k. Then he said, "Plus, if I let you go, I'd have to let everybody go." I was so close to saying, "Yeah? Well nobody else has a ******** guitar to carry around with them, now do they? NO." But whatever. I bit my tongue and walked back to my desk. Well, actually I bit my lip because it's kinda tore-up, but same difference. They're both in my mouth.
I cried in second block today. We're doing a play called "Rabbit Hole" and in one of the scenes, I'm Becca. The married woman who lost her four-year-old-son to a car. Then apparently, her dad is a d**k. I can really relate to Becca [besides the whole kid part] because she doesn't believe in God after all the s**t she's been through, and her dad's a total a*****e, and her mom tries to comfort her when she doesn't want comforting. That's pretty much how my life was. So ********. It just reminded me of all that, because my line is, "Well, if there was a God, I'd say he's a sadistic jerk!" then my next line after everybody's like, "Gasp!" is "No wonder you like him so much, mom. He sounds just like dad." Which, of course, made me cry. It was awful. I need to cry the night before the performance so I don't cry on stage. D':
PLUS. I'm sick with allergies and a ******** migrane! I hate it! I got sick from my mom coughing all over my pillow, my migrane is from GOD knows what, and my allergies are from all the... I don't even know what. It's just pissing me off. I'm in kinda a pissy mood. I didn't even want to go to school today. D': Today was just an awful day for me. Full of disappointment, hurt, bringing back of awful memories, feeling nausious, wanting to sleep all day, etc. :/ I'm wrapping this up. Taataa.
 CaRto0nz · Fri Feb 01, 2008 @ 10:50pm · 0 Comments |
