You, who broke my heart again and again. I don't want to hurt for you again. I didn't want to cry for you again. But I can't help it. I can't forget you. It's a simpler process to just cut my fingers off, and *I* can't do that, because I'm an artist.
I can't forget you, because no matter how hard I try, you remain in my head. In my bloody heart. Someway along the crossroads of our lives, you've become part of something important to me. And I've become dependant upon you. Not just because you understand me--but because you're so much like me in so many ways. There are so many differences between us, but there are similarities too. You probably can't see them--but then again, they're probably subtle.
You--you are McDreamy. You will always be McDreamy. You're sure as hell not perfect--but then again, neither am I. I'm scary and damaged. But I'm not happy, and I never will be. But I want you to be happy, because you deserve to be happy. And when you're happy, I guess I will be too. But I'm not happy--and sometimes, I wish my happiness could be taken into account before others'.
I want you to be happy. And if that means I have to step out of the picture, then I'll bow out--the way I've always done. I guess it was just wishful thinking on my part that we could be happy together. I wanted so much to be happy with you--to be happy in your arms.
But if you being happy means you're happy with someone else, then by all means.
I'll step aside again.
For now, I'll stand in my little island. I have my God. I have my family and my friends. I have my art and my writing to keep me occupied.
I'll wait for you. Because I want to know what its like to be happy with you.
So remember me. Please.
Because I love you.
Emmelyn Community Member |
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