yeah. I went and I knew that it was a bad idea. I knew I would cry if I saw them together. Because I knew that it would never be me. They made it through. And I couldnt. They just looked so happy that.....it couldnt be a reality that I could obtain. They've been together since middleschool. Almost the exact position that we went through.....and my soul is gone. I started to get tears.... the whole atmosphere..... the whole thing.... it was impossible for me to stay. So I stayed until I couldnt take it anymore. I just used my foot for an excuse and we left after 3-4 hours. So I wanted to cry. And now its almost as if I wish that things were different. my cousin is so immature but he managed a better relationship and I couldnt. Sure Im immature sometimes but I took my relationship seriously. I tried so hard to keep it together and it wouldnt work. I was so scared of being alone. I knew that if he gained these new friends though that there was no way I could get back to reality. And thats what happened. He wanted to hide himself and now hes a ******** pimp....... A ******** PIMP!!!!!!!!!!!! I was just some item in those guys eyes.....a toy that could be messed with.......and he let them talk him into going with someone who isnt even pretty. Shes so homely and Im the ugly one. I have a better personality. Shes liable to cheat on him and he doesnt even realize it. How dare he...... he left me broken....and if she leaves him hes going to come crawling back..... and by than, I dont think Ill be living anymore......I think Im just going to be a shell......and......knowing me....Ill let him come back.... because Im so stupid..........I hate myself..............................
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