well i did have a spark of inperation but i lost the sence when becky was being a lil brat trying to ruffle my feathers getting on the comp. but anyway my mined lalty has alot on its plate so much i became a bit emotional not like i lost it in anger or something like it i like 2 keep 2 my self on that note always have been. probaply cuz i was a very disturbed and curious but i was quite calm bout the unusual but interesting facts of my life. Rality came naturaly as a child. i guess cuz i didnt understand. i could tear up wout even saying anything but thats not the way i like things 2 be. i can remember a few very vivid memorys like from wat i remember my frist day of living it sounds weird but i guess ud have 2 be ther 2 understand another is a dream i had a reouccring dream of a girl in an lil abstract but coloerful like watching a t.v. show only u were in in all it would be was a girl standing across from me staring at me then sudden tears woiuld rool down her face i never coul mae out its reason 4 haunting me up untill my ealry years of elementary my 1st school i ever attended was Parmer ln. ELE. i went their 4 my kinder years which was 2 cuz i was shy and the techers made it out to be me just not learning the language as easily as others wat impacted me was the second thing of realization of the reality of life i had 1 true friend in those years and his name was JD we were like best friends till i had 2 stay in kinder a second year he acted as if he hadnt known me ever in his life it hurt but i hadnt relized how bad it hurt me till i got older when i started pretending i had money and i had a pool and such just 2 get friends but we moved so many times i got 2 start over over each time i gave up the lying realizing it was not worth my while to make friends that i was gonna eventually leave behind. my sister was a baby still and so has almost no memory of the times when my parents spit. i remember a time when i saw a strang man in the same room my mom and dad shared i hadnt a clue who this was we werent the type to have many visitors around wat frieghtend me was that he was lying down on the bed my mom said he was just a friend helping her take care of paper work i wonder till thiss day weather he was just a friend or if he was my dads boss or a random man sleeping with my mom. and as time went by my dad moved out. it was just my mom becky and me. soon my uncles started coming around thats when things started going even worse and the thing is i didnt know any wrong doing and some things i say right here and now are confesstions no one has ever known. my unles pepe and mario came to help my mother out cuz she had to work of corse. i can still remember the red t-shirt that had the H-E-B logo on the boosom of her shirt and the tan pants with a belt.
midnit_r0ck · Fri Jul 24, 2009 @ 02:10am · 0 Comments |