You know that feeling you get when you are so alone that all you can do is think about the times when you weren't? I hate that feeling, so I try to escape it, but I can't get away from it. All I want is for someone to need me to be alive, someone who wants me for me and not for who I was. I only want to get back everything I lost after my joy was stolen from me. I want to wake up every morning with that feeling that no matter what I do or look like or feel like, there will be someone for me. I hate feeling sad everytime I hear a song because I know that it applies completely to me. Every connection I have to my old life is almost severed and there isn't a single ******** thing I can do about it, and I hate that feeling. I guess by now you think I'm crazy or suicidal or something like that, I guess I should clear some things up; I'm crazy when I'm happy, I'm not suicidal most of the time, and yes I guess I will eventually get over the things that haunt me both in waking and sleeping, but until that day comes I am nothing but a waste of emotion, time, and space.
 vardamacariel · Sun Mar 13, 2005 @ 03:25am · 3 Comments |
