Grrwar Bitches!

/waves
Hello ^0^ My name is, obviously, MidnightWolfForLife, but you can call me whatever you're brain can come up with. I've been called Wolfie, Dim, Midnight, MidBoss (get it? get it? Oh.. you don't?), and the list goes on and on. Truthfully, I don't remember most of the names I've been called. Though, I do know I get called insane names (Like MidBoss) because I would give others random nicknames. It's just a habit of mine, so don't be surprised if your username is Alice_Loves_Cheese and I call you Oves or something. Yea, I'm weird like that.
Anyway, after the nonsense, my age is a number xO Amazing, right? I live in always hot Texas, have been living here for the longest time, and it's been hotter then hell -.- I mean, sure it's rained a few times lately (yesterday, for instance), but it's still hot... I rather be in Iowa, where it snows... Oh! Little fact: In all truth, there is not a lie in this, but my last name is Snow. Yup, Snow. I get poked at thanks to it (Hey ____, it's the middle of summer, change your last name! or At ____'s house, there was about 15 feet of snow... Comment if you got that)
If it wasn't already obvious, I love music and anime. Music much, much more though. For me the quote 'My life without music is like your life without water, it's impossible.' comes to mind, or at least that's what my friends say. I don't think there has been a day, other then when my mom takes my ipod >.> (i steal it back, no worries), that I haven't had my ipod or some sort of music player on my person. I always, and I mean always, have earphones around my neck, to a point where if I don't, a teacher asks me what's wrong. Yea, you can call be obsessed, but I have my reasons for loving music. For anime, I don't have to have a damn reason to love it. Anime/Manga is amazing and if you don't think so, call me a freak and leave this page damn it. Now, have a good show that I might like? Feel free to tell me about it. I may like Anime, but I don't actually watch any unless I'm told or think it's cool. Bleach, for example. I think it's amazing, I really do, but I'm just too lazy to watch all the episodes to make sense of it xD
Now, another thing you need to know about me straight up, is that I can't stand anyone that hates homos/bisexuals, so you can leave right now. I don't even want you to talk to me, that's how much I dislike you. NO, I am not ******** bisexual. Just because I support the cause doesn't automatically mean that I'm homosexual, you ******** haters. If you can't tell, I become very protective over anyone that is or supports this. It's like being racist, if you haven't already guessed. Bet you are too, you ******** up little.... You people that are homophobic or some s**t, it's just because you're too ******** scared to make the change yourself. You people that hate homos because of the damn Bible or because of your religion, well I like to tell you that I'm ******** Atheist or not religious, yet I know more then you. I know that it says love everyone no matter who or what they are, so you can suck my non-existent d**k!
*cough, cough*
Sorry, went a little overboard there, I don't usually curse this much on the internet, so you won't see so many stars unless you piss me off haha. On a lighter note, I love to roleplay. If you have any ideas, any at all, feel free to contact me. I'm in my fetish where it's usually yaoi, I accept anything, though! PM me please :3
If you really want to know anything else about me, feel free to ask. It'll help me shape up my profile a bit more, or at least this part. I most likely will put your question, if it's not seriously personal, up in case others have the same question xP Well... I guess you can go on with my suckish profile xD This is my first time editing in years! I think... I don't even remember xD I'm editing again :3


I love this...

You are a Chibi Seme!
You are the seme in disguise. Able to fit in and get along with uke and seme alike, you are able to get close to the uke on their level before exerting your dominance. This makes you at times manipulative and able to fool others about your true seme nature. Because of your harmless appearance, it takes the flamboyant Flaming Uke to match wits and really bring out your aggressive side to expose you for the seme that you are.
Most compatible with: Flaming Uke, Badass Uke
Least compatible with: Dramatic Uke
What seme or uke are you? Take the experience at SemeUke.com, or find merchandise here.

Bout Me
My friend wanted me to do this...

1. THE BASICS
2. Name: Halle (pronounced Hal-Lee)
3. Gender: Female
4. Age: 16
5. Screen Name: MidnightWolfForLife (At one point was LunaKena or something)
6. Birthday: June 12, 1995
7.Race: Caucasian, A mix of indian
8. School/Grade: Junior
9. Job: Babysitting x)
10. Status: Single
11. Hometown: Hell
12. Current Town: Wonderland
13. Parents Still Together: No, mother's getting remarried
14. Siblings: 1 brother, 1 step-brother, and 2 half-siblings (boy and girl)
15. Pets: Zeus, golden retriever
16. Smoker: Ew, no
17. Drinker: No, only sips
18. Virgin: Proudly
19. Orientation: Straight
20. Drugs: Absolutely not

21. APPEARANCE
22. Hair Color: Brighter blond in summer, usually a dirty blond
23. Is it Dyed?: Put red highlights in August this year
24. Eye color: Special-Ed Blue - Darker around the pupil, like midnight blue, but gets lighter as it goes away from the pupil, like sky blue.
25. Height: 5'3 in a half
26. Style: Jeans, band shirts, T-shirts, sneakers, wrist bands, my necklace and charm bracelet
27. Glasses/Contacts/None?: None, people think I wear contacts though thanks to my special-ed eyes
28. Freckles: Some
29. Body Type: AB- or O, can't remember
30. Shoe Size: 7 and 8
31. Piercings: Ears, one on each ear
32. Want More?: Yes, snake bites and nose ring
33. Tattoos?: No
34. Want More?: I want one, yes
35. Braces?: Nope! Not now
36. Overall Best Feature?: My eyes
37. Overall Worst Feature?: Body structure or whatever
38. Do you get most of your traits from mom or dad?: Father

39. LIKES/DISLIKES
40. Favorite Color: Black and Red
41. Worst Color: Pink, really. I have to redye my hair, it looks pink -.-
42. Favorite Number: 13 and 5
43. Favorite Animal: Wolf and Panther
44. Least Favorite Animal: None, really
45. Favorite Flower: Variegated Tulip
46. Favorite Food: Wings and Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream
47. Worst Food: No idea
48. Favorite Junk Food: Soda
49. Worst Junk Food: Soda - I love it, but I hate it
50. Favorite Restaurant: Uhmm, place with food?
51. Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: I just said that!
52. Favorite Candy: Truthfully, I don't eat a lot of candy.
53. Favorite Alcoholic Drink: Who knows? I don't drink a lot
54. Favorite NON Alcoholic Drink: Dr. Pepper baby!
55. Worst Alcoholic Drink: This blood-red wine my mom has. Ew
56. Worst NON Alcoholic Drink: Tea, unless my friend makes it.
57. Favorite Genre of Music: Rock, Punk (Screamo), and just about anything, really
58. Worst Genre: Most country and rap
59. Favorite Band/Artist: Three Days Grace and everything else is tied
60. Worst Band/Artist: Um, I think I like songs from every person I've listened to.
61. Favorite Song: Recently? Misfit by Lesley Roy, amazing
62. Worst Song: Never say Never by Justin Beiber (or whatever). He says never over like 72 times. My brother loves him =.=
63. Favorite Radio Station: I don't listen to the radio a lot
64. Favorite Book: Too many to count
65. Worst Book: Most School Books
66. Favorite Type of Movie: Action, Comedy. Or Disney, their early movies were amazing.
67. Worst Type of Movie: Errr, annoying ones?
68. Favorite Movie: Too many to count, again
69. Worst Movie Ever: Twilight Series, it's nothing like the book
70. Favorite TV Show: NCIS, crime shows
71. Worst TV Show: Most new kid shows (minus Advernture time) on Cartoon Network, Nick, and Disney
72. Favorite Season of the Year: Winter
73. Worst Season: Summer
74. Best Friend: Don't have one
75. Worst Enemy: No one, really
76. Favorite Day of the Week: Days I'm off?
77. Least Favorite Day of the Week: Wednesday, uniform day
78. Favorite Sport: Volleyball
79. Sport You Hate: None, really
80. One thing you cant get enough of: Music, I really can't
81. One thing you hate more than anything: Being bothered when I want to be alone

82. LOVE LIFE
83. Are You Single?: Yes'um.
84. If not, who is your bf/gf?: His names Bob!
85. How Long Have You Been Together?: Forever, he's my imaginary friend :3
86. If You're Single, Do you Like It?: Sure, not a fan of being touched
87. Do You Have a Crush On Anyone Right Now?: Not really...?
88. First Kiss: Done, but with a douche
89. Ever Kiss in the Rain?: I wish, one romantic this I would love to do!
90. In a Movie Theater?: No, I never see the point of making out in a public place...
91. Underwater?: As entertaining as that might be, no
92. First Love: I don't know much about love so who knows?
93. Have you ever Cheated on Anyone?: That's just cruel
94. Been Cheated on?: Yes, 'on accident' he says, ugh.
95. Used Someone?: Not that I know of
96. Been used?: Annoyingly enough
97. Lied to your bf/gf?: White lies, sure
98. Ever Made out With Just a Friend?: Nope, my friends are freaks xD
99. Ever Had Sex With Just a Friend?: Obviously not, being a virgin
100. Are You a Tease?: No that I know of?
101. Do you Flirt a Lot?: Not knowingly, I guess
102. Longest Relationship: I don't count the days in my relationship, maybe three months? Two? No idea
103. Shortest: 1 day, I didn't even know we were dating until he tried to kiss me.
104. Have you Ever Gotten a Poem?: Yes, oh so cute
105. Ever Get Flowers?: Yes, from friends (almost said flowers!) and guys that liked me
106. Sweetest Thing You've Ever Gotten: A teddy bear <3
107. Do you Like Valentine's Day or Sweetest Day?: I don't exactly have Sweetest Day, but Valentine's Day isn't a happy day for me. Mainly because my grandmother, not because I'm single
108. Do you Believe in Love at First Sight?: No, I believe in love at first fight biggrin
109. Do you Believe in: ... YES I DO biggrin
110. Do you Fall in Love Fast?: Ha, no, I'm the least trusting person ever
111. Are you a Player?: Nope
112. Would you ever Hook Up With Someone of the Same sex?: Nope
113. Have You ever Kissed 2 People in One Day?: Yes, but it was friendly
114. Kissed 2 People At One Time?: Yes, but again, friendly
115. Had Sex with 2 People in One day?: Uhhh no
116. Had sex with 2+ People at One Time? HELLO, VIRGIN HERE!
117. Ever cried over someone of the opposite sex?: Once, but not because they broke my heart
118. Ever Been Dumped?: Yes and then he went for my friend, who said yes. How nice.
119. Ever dumped someone?: Yes, but were friends still
120. Ever been rejected?: Nope
121. Do you have a lot of ex's?: My friends think I do
122. Are you a slut?: Nope
123. Ever been called one?: Yes, mostly playfully though
124. Ever dated someone more than once?: One time
125. Do you ever make the first move?: Yupp
126. Double dates or single?: Double and with a close friend, so I won't be touched xD
127. Do you want to get married?: Not really, unless I really like the guy.

128. OPPOSITE SEX (what you're attracted to)
129. Hair Color: Dark, black most likely
130. Short or long?: Not overly long but not jock short. In the end, though, I don't care, as long as it's not greasy
131. Style: Please no one preppy or a hick
132. Age: Older, not younger
133. Height: Taller then me, but not like overly tall
134. Weight: Hmm, not so big he'd crush me, I guess.
135. Muscular Or Skinny: Not overly muscular, I guess
136. Boxers or Briefs: Haha, whatever they want, but I'm teasing them bout the briefs
137. Do you care about looks?: Nope, but it's a really big bonus haha
138. Other: They have to be able to have fun
139. Can you drive?: Yup
140. Do You Have a Car?: Yupp, my babies a mustang
141. Do you have a cell phone?: Yes
142. Are you online a lot?: Depends if I'm bored or not
143. Do you like gay/bi people?: I support them, they're not different from anyone else
144. Can you speak another language?: I'm learning German
145. Do you do well in school?: About a A//B average with a C here and there
146. Do you collect anything?: Books, use to collect stuff animals x3
147. Have an obsession?: Umm hair? I don't collect it or anything (ew), but I just love running my hands through peoples hair. Which is why mines so soft~
148. Do you hate yourself?: Sometimes
149. Ever smile for no reason?: Without knowing it, too
150. Talk to yourself?: When I'm pissed, depressed, or trying to process something
151. Do you have any regrets?: After I really think about it, no, not really.
152. Believe in magic?: Most of the time
153. Do you support gay marriage?: Hell yes
154. Sex before marriage?: I don't really know, I wouldn't prefer it, I guess.
155. Do you trust people easily?: Nope
156. Forgive easily?: Yea right, unless it's something petty, no
157. Do you have a secret no one knows?: Yes, a few
158. Do you get along with your parents?: Sometimes, at the moment yes
159. What about other people?: Most of the time, unless I really don't like them
160. How do you vent your anger?: Cursing under my breath, going to punch something but stopping short, umm mostly by listening to music
161. Do you like George Bush?: I guess..?
162. Goal Before you die?: Who knows?
163. Biggest Fear: Losing my family
164. Biggest Weakness: I don't show whenever I'm depressed or angry, no one believes me when I tell them somethings wrong, guess I call that a weakness
165. Do you play an instrument?: I wish
166. What do you want to be when you grow up?: . . . Happy

167. PERSONALITY TRAITS - Are you...
168. A b***h?: At times I'm called one
169. A daydreamer?: All the time
170. Shy?: Depends. People I know but don't hang with, a bit, total strangers I'll never see again, nope.
171. Talkative?: Yes, once I like/know someone or a stranger I'll never see again biggrin
172. Energetic?: Yes, around most people
173. Happy?: Acting, all the time
174. Depressed?: In front of others, never
175. Funny?: Most think I am
176. Slutty?: Most unslutty person you'll meet, unless I'm messing around
177. Boring?: Not usually
178. Mean?: Mostly in a playing way
179. Nice?: Ehh, my friends say I'm nice when the world stops turning xD
180. Caring?: Yes, or at least try to be. I'm pretty emotionless other then being annoyingly happy
181. Trustworthy?: Unless it's life threatening, yes
182. Confident?: Most of the time
183. Friendly?: Yes, mostly to strangers and friends
184. Smart?: I have my blond moments but I'd like to believe I'm a bit smart
185. Sarcastic?: Yupp
186. Dependable?: I can be
187. Quiet?: In class I can, or whenever I want to be left alone
188. Weird?: Oh, hell yes
189. Adaptable?: To a point
190. Strong (emotionally)?: Usually, I've only shown my tears once around a really close friend
191. Strong (physically)?: Depends, I guess
192. Mature?: Never, my friends say
193. Logical?: Depends on what we're speaking bout
194. Religious?: Nope. The only religion I like is Greek.
195. Modest?: I try to be
196. Indecisive?: Yes I can be haha
197. Sympathetic?: Not really
198. Polite?: I try to be when meeting adults
199. Creative?: At times
200. Fun to be around?: I hope so
201. Loveable?: To a point. Hug me longer the necessary, I might go a bit crazy
202. Easily Amused?: Oh yes, very
203. Outgoing?: Most of the time
204. Daring?: Sometimes, I've done stupid things before haha
205. Clumsy?: Yes, my friends and even strangers laugh at me -.-
206. Nosy?: Sometimes ;3
207. Lazy?: Most of the time
208. Scary?: I can be, when I'm starting to get angry
209. Optimistic?: Not really, I can be a real downer at times and get smacked cause of it haha
210. Persuasive?: Can be
211. A good listener?: I guess, as long as I don't have to comfort you, I'm really good at it
212. Curious?: Naturally
213. Determined?: Depending, even then not really haha
214. Artistic?: I wish Dx
215. Honest?: Try to be
216. Respectful?: With adults that don't tolerate disrespect (unless it's my parents)
217. Conceited?: Try not to be
218. Cocky?: If I have right to be x3
219. Controlling?: Not knowingly, I guess
220. Playful?: Oh hell yes
221. Easygoing?: To a point
222. Carefree?: Again, to a point
223. Hot Headed?: I can be, depending on the situation
224. Serious?: When I have to be. I might burst into laughter if something unserious happens, though
225. Thoughtful?: I guess
226. Considerate?: I try to be
227. Stubborn?: Yes
228. Romantic?: It's hard for me to be romantic, I might laugh
229. Ambitious?: Sometimes
230. Jealous?: My friends that I need to be jealous. No, not at all
231. Insecure?: Secretly
232. Obsessive?: I sure as hell hope not
233. Attentive?: Most of the time
234. Helpful?: Not in comforting, but in other things, sure
235. Punctual?: Most of the time, no
236. Rational?: I can be
237. Sincere?: I guess?
238. Tolerant?: Depending
239. Goodbye: WHY ARE YOU LEAVING ME D:
240. Did you enjoy this survey?: I guess?
241. Was it too long?: Passed the time xD
242. Do you think it contained just about everything?: Not that I know of, but nice try?

For Your Signature

98% of teenagers have consumed alcohol, smoked, or have had sex. Put this in your signature if you like bagels.

95% Of Teens Would Break Down If The Jonas Brothers Or Miley Cyrus Was About To Jump Off A Building To Kill Themselves.
Copy And Paste If Your The 5% That Would Grab Your Camera And Film While Yelling
"You can do it!!"

90% of teens would be freaking out if Miley Cyrus was standing on the edge of a tall building.
Make this your signature if you would be one of the 10% yelling "JUMP B*TCH!"

95% of all teen girls would go into a panic if Edward Cullen was on a 247 foot building about to jump to kill himself.
Copy and paste this if you are one of the 5% who brought popcorn,a chair, and shouted "DO A FLIP!"

90% of all teens would cry if Miley Cyrus was on the top of a high cliff. 8% would shout jump. I'm one of the 2% that would push her

Randomness

Motorcycle Love Tragedy:

Girl: Slow down im scared
Guy: No this is fun
Girl: No its not! Please slow down, its too scary
Guy: Then tell me you love me
Girl: I love you! Now please slow down
Guy: Now give me a big hug
She gave him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet & put it on yourself its bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road the guy realized that the breaks were broke he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him he loved her one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so that she would live even if it meant that he would die.

*If you would do the same for the person you love (Girl/boyfriend, family, friends) copy this in your profile*


_♥_♥___♥_♥_ ρυт тнiՏ
♥___♥_♥___♥ нєαrт
_♥___♥___♥_ oη yoυr
__♥_____♥__ ραgє if
___♥___♥___ yoυ lovє
____♥_♥____ Տoмone




Boy: I love her more than the air I breathe
Girl: Well , I'm always here for you .
Boy: I know that .
Girl: What's wrong ?
Boy: I love her so much .
Girl: Then talk to her !
Boy: I don't know . She probably won't like me .
Girl: Don't say that , your amazing .
Boy: I just want her to know how I feel ...
Girl: Then tell her .
Boy: She wont like me ...
Girl: How do you know that ?
Boy: I can just tell ..
Girl: Well just tell her !
Boy: What should i say ?
Girl: Tell her how much you love her .
Boy: I tell her that daily .
Girl: What do you mean ?
Boy: I'm always with her . I love her ..
Girl: I know how you feel . I have the same problem. But he'll never like me ......
Boy: Wait .... Who do you like?
Girl: Oh some guy ...
Boy: Oh ... She wont like me either.
Girl: She does !
Boy: But how would you know ?
Girl: Because , who wouldn't like you ?
Boy: I don't know .. You .
Girl: You're wrong, I love you .. More than you'll ever know .
Boy: I love you too !
Girl: So .. Are you going to talk to her ?
Boy: I just did .

.ılı.------Volume------.ılı.
▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄ █ ▄
Min- - - - - - - - - - -●Max
Music is Life!

╔╗╔═╦╗ Put this on your
║╚╣║║╚╗ page if u say lol
╚═╩═╩═╝ a lot

Child Abuse

Her name was Auroura
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endore

A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly cries
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
" God, why? Why is
My life always sinking? "

Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrust the blade
Right in her chest,
" You deserve to die
You worthless pest! "

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

A child dies every day from child abuse. And if you have an ounce of pity in you for little Auroura and you hate child abuse with a passion you will repost this and help out those abused children and let them know that someone cared for them. If you don't then you should go to frikin hell, this is horrible what happened to these innocent children. It doesn't take that long to repost only about 10 seconds so please just do it. its worth it to let everyone see this.
some people are so cruel... this is terrible but it happens so much we cant ignore it.do the right thing.

....♥SeXy♥..♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥...♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy♥.......♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy.♥.....♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥
...........♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥......♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy♥.......♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥...♥SeXy♥
.........♥SeXy♥

♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥

♥SeXy♥........♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy♥......♥SeXy♥
..♥SeXy♥....♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥..♥SeXy♥
....♥SeXy♥.♥SeXy♥
....♥SeXy♥♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥..♥SeXy♥
..♥SeXy♥....♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy♥......♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥........♥SeXy♥

♥SeXy♥......♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥......♥SeXy♥
♥SeXy♥.....♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy♥...♥SeXy♥
..S♥eXy♥.♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥SeXy♥♥
.......♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥
.....♥SeXy♥
....♥SeXy♥
...♥SeXy♥
..♥SeXy♥
.♥SeXy

TIME FOR A MATH LESSON
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint...
What makes 100 percent? What does it mean to give MORE than 100 percent? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100 percent? We all have been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over one hundred percent. How about achieving 103 percent? What makes up 100 percent in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions;
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11= 98 percent
and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5= 96 percent
but
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 =100 percent
and,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20= 103 percent
and look how far this one will take you,
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7= 118 percent!
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while HARD WORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close, and ATTITUDE will get you there, its really the BULLSHIT and a** KISSING that will put you over the top. (and this is the truth, kiddies.)

--Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
--Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
--If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
--Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
--Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
--Why is the word abbreviation so long?
--If a turtle doesnt have a shell is he homeless or naked?
--If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?
--Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
--Sleep: A completely inadequate substitute for caffeine/sugar.
--Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
--My imaginary friend thinks you have mental problems.
--Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words
--I used up all of my sick days...so I'm calling in dead

Teen Commandments
1. Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(why wait that long)
2. Thou shall not do drugs.
(alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)
3. Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)
4. Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)
5. Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(everyone knows grandma has more money)
6. Thou shall not get into fights.
(Cat fight anyhow...just start them.)
7. Thou shall not skip class.
(just take the whole day off)
8. Thou shall not wear revealing clothes in class.
(Hooters pays more)
9. Thou shall not think about having sex.
(like Nike says, "just do it")
10. Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(just leave 'em in the middle)

You know you're obssesed with Anime when...
1. You own a shiny metal object of doom.
2. You and your friends have anime nicknames.
3. You know your favorite character’s birthday; favorite color, food, and animal, blood type, and you cant even remember your sibling’s birthday.
4. You are in multiple anime fan clubs (or own some!).
5. You almost die if you miss an episode of your favorite anime, or can't buy the newest manga.
6. Your friend shows you their manga collection and you drool all over their carpet.
7. You have dressed up as you favorite character on Halloween, or just for fun!
8. You have a picture of your favorite character in your wallet or purse.
9. You prefer guys with long silver hair and swords. (guys, just think of a female equivalent)
10. You write a story about your favorite character for English class.
11. You have pictures of anime all over you walls.
12. You have a dream in Japanese and you don’t even understand it.
13. You want to learn Japanese for no apparent reason, even though you have never been to Japan and probably never will.
14. Your knowledge of Japanese only extends to "hello" and "I will kill you". (or something along those lines)
15. You begin to learn Japanese through watching subs.
16. You use Japanese when in a conversation with any random person, and don’t realize you did until you see them looking at you funny.
17.You can't speak Japanese and can't understand Japanese, yet you can sing along to the theme song of every anime movie you own.
18. You accidentally call a very unintelligent person Kuwabara by mistake.
19. You wear a pink jewel around your neck and call it the shikon jewel.
20. You waist countless amounts of hair gel trying to that "goku" look.
21. (If you speak English) when English becomes your second language.
22. You name (or plan to name) your children after anime characters.
23. You buy shuriken or kunai.
24. You speak in subtitles.
25. You prefer anime over real life.
26. You begin to think that blue or pink is a natural hair color.
27. You continually buy and eat ramen, even if you don’t like it that much.
28. You suddenly decide to study a random martial art.
29. You cosplay daily.
30. When you get a crush on an anime character.
31. When you accidentally call someone an anime character's name
32. When you see someone with vaguely pointed ears and start screaming "Yōkai!" at them.
33. When you want ramen to be added to your school's lunch menu.

Ways to annoy the hell out of people:
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
2. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
3. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
4. Sniffle incessantly.
5. Name your dog "Dog."
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions " to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."
8. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
9. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
10. Drum on every available surface.
11. Honk and wave to strangers
12. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
13. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.
14. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
15. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
16. dont use any punctuation either
17. Pay for your dinner with pennies.
18. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
19. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."
20. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
21. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
22. Sing the lamb chop neverending song over and over again.
23. Mow your lawn with scissors.
24. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
25. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
26. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
27. Never make eye contact.
28. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
29. Never break eye contact.
30. Stare at strangers just for the heck of it.
31. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries
with that.
32. Sing along at the opera.

~You know you live in 2009 when...
1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Only in America...
...Can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance
...Are there handicap parking spaces in front of ice-skating rinks
...Sick people go to the back of Walgreens to get their medicine, while healthy people get their cigarettes at the front
...People buy hotdogs in packs of 10 and hotdog buns in packs of 8
...The banks leave both vaults open and then chain the pens to the counter
...People order a double cheese burger, large fries, and a diet coke
...People leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveways and keep their junk in garages
...People use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss the calls from someone they don't want to talk to in the first place
...Is the word "politics" used to describe the process so well; "Poli-" in latin means "many" and "tics" mean "blood-sucking creatures

10 Best Things About Being a Girl;
10. We can wear guy clothes, but if they wear ours they get funny looks
9. At least one girl always survives in horror movies
8. We can put cotton between our toes and paint our nails without feeling the least bit silly
7. Our magazines have horoscopes
6. Girls with guy first names like Taylor sound cool, but it doesn't work the other way around
5. Our friends don't say "hi" but punching us in the arm
4. Yes PMS sucks, but at least we have an excuse to lay around eating chocolate once a month
3. Make-up covers any imperfections we may have
2. If we flirt with a cop, we can get out of a speeding ticket
1. Girl Talk... you know, the way we all just understand each other without having to explain a thing