About
I am a girl, and after so long I lied and hurt people. I need to end that so I am doing this now, I greatly apologize to everyone. I feel terrible. Being caught more than once didn't change, but this time it did because i knew it'd be bigger trouble and I knew once again I failed both myself and my dad. I got a bit better, only doing it for writing purposes and not to trick people and live a false personal life, but I still lied and I know that is bad. I have a problem, and this is my way to fix it.I changed everything to what I truly am, got rid of the old and am only using what is true. I need to control myself, i know I can and I will. I promise. This won't come off so people know what happened and I feel like people should know what happened, on all that I've been on. Honestly, it made me feel liked, it made me feel loved and it made me feel happy. But could I really be happy when I was secretly hurting other people? Not at all, and I think I finally get that. I didn't mean to hurt people, it's hard to explain. I hate myself so much that, in living as another person, I could be the me that seemed "cool" or that everyone loved.
Honestly, right now, I feel more depressed in reality than in what I did. I don't even know if my friends are my friends, maybe just one or two. I hate myself, I bottle up my feelings, I help others but never say a word if I am not helped back, I a playfully called stupid or an idiot and put up with it, I just hated it. That's why I changed. But no more.
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