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Psychoanalyzing Edward Cullen! |
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Edward Cullen, realizing his mindreading gift, begins using it defensively to predict the actions of humans he encounters. As he accrues more and more experience, he becomes more and more accurate. And he learns to dismiss people. This is his first mistake.
Like the Volturi, he sees the thirst as a natural part of vampirism. So he becomes less and less committed to denying it.
If I only prey upon the predators, it can’t be evil, can it?
He forgets that someone listening to his thoughts would see precisely the cold-hearted killer he isn’t. His victims see it. As do his intended beneficiaries. In time, he sees it himself – the red-eyed figure in the mirror. It embodies the thirst. But because he has seen thirst as a natural part of vampirism, it is impossible to separate them now. The Villain was Vampire.
Carlisle had conquered Him. I… I had let Him win.
Edward returns to Carlisle, hoping to learn how to defeat Vampire. But he does not understand that Carlisle defeats Vampire by accepting it. This is his second mistake/ He learns to control his thirst, but not entirely. In an effort to keep Vampire away, he stays as far away from humans as possible.
Enter Bella. He cannot hear her thoughts, and so he cannot dismiss her and brush her off as he has taught himself to do. But perhaps he can still avoid her. Then science class…
I thought I had locked him far out of sight, but He crept out through the cracks to remind me, laughing, that I was still His slave.
He runs away. But he comes back.
I had defeated Him. I knew it. He couldn’t hurt me, He couldn’t have me. I was free…
However, it’s a small town and a smaller school, and he can’t help being in close proximity to Bella. Which is why he finds himself in the parking lot on that particular icy morning. Later, he won’t know why he saved her. But his response to Tyler’s van was based on a fundamental human emotion.
Boredom.
His habit of making and acting on assumptions, cardboard thought-images of the people he meets, has left him locked within his family. New is dangerous. Categories are safe. But the human mind, the vampire mind, thrive on the unexpected. And so he reacts to push Bella away from that truck because he can’t stand losing the one aspect of his life that he can’t predict. The one aspect of his life that is dangerous.
Of course, as soon as his conscious mind regains control, he again attempts to limit his contact as much as possible. He tries to dissuade Bella from being near him through vague warnings. He assumes that she will be naturally repulsed by the vampire in him.
Why can’t she see Him leering at her? Does she have a death wish?
He doesn’t realize that Bella sees an entirely different vampire from the one lurking in the back of his mind.
Now we come to that night in Seattle, those men with predatory intentions. All he can see is anger, and the grinning red-eyed Vampire. So he stays with her, because as frightened of her as he is, he is frightened of it more.
Please… don’t let Him take me. I am strong, but weak enough. Help me...
To his shock, she knows what he is. She knows the name of his captor. And yet she does not pull away from him. So he stays with her still because she reminds him of what it is to be human, because every time she marvels at him he knows that he is strong, because as near as the thirst is, he can feel its master. He keeps her close.
Except for when they get too close. Then he lashes out at her.
Damn it, Bella – you’ll be the death of me. You’ll hand me over to Him. I know you will…
He claims, perhaps believes, that he is dangerous to her. But he is yet more dangerous to himself, for he does not know his fear and his anger. He does not know its source.
Until his adversary appears in the flesh. A red-eyed face in a forest clearing. Perhaps in his inner heart, he cannot tell the difference between James and his Vampire. In any case, his reaction is the same as it would be if the struggle were inside his head.
He runs.
He followed me. Shut up and get out of here. She doesn’t understand, she never fought Him, just a child, just another human. She’s mine, hear me? I will not let You have her. Hold her down. We can run…
Never was Vampire closer to winning than at that moment. You don’t need to take someone’s blood to take their life.
Nor will he accept the idea of turning Bella, because that, too, would feel like a victory for Vampire. It isn’t that he doesn’t believe they have souls. It is that he believes their souls are forfeit to this demon of his own creation.
And it is Bella who again saves him from Vampire’s hold, reminds him of a better way to fight, that there are other lives in the balance, other fights to fight, other ways to trick the hunter.
When Bella herself falls victim to the hunter’s trick, Edward comes closest to being forever free of Vampire’s clutches. He is able to suck the venom from her wound, tell by tastes, as no human could have done, that she was safe. And yet he is unable to draw the poison from his own heart.
Because I was a vampire, I could have killed her.
Does he think that if he were not a vampire, he could not have saved her? No. Vampire is the enemy. Vampire could never perform an act of good.
Even as he runs from Bella to keep her away from Vampire, he does not realize that the danger is only a figment of his own fears and weakness. As long as he does not know who he is really fighting, he cannot win.
And so, whether he is present or not, he will continue to make Bella the victim of a monster that he created.
Aldorel · Tue Jun 12, 2007 @ 10:29pm · 8 Comments |
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