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HEART TO HEART"

Keeping love alive is hard work.

Anyone who has experienced falling in love will admit that love is not static. From day one, it is a constant struggle to keep love alive.

Love is the flower that needs to be nurtured to survive. It is watered by tenderness and care. It thrives on attention, understanding and concern for the beloved’s welfare.

Love also has its seasons. It blooms in springtime, reaches its peak in the summer, starts waning in autumn, hibernates in winter and resurfaces in the spring.

Someone I used to know, now long gone, whose beloved bewailed his seeming coldness at one time, console her by telling her that it was the "winter" of their love and assured her that it would not be long before spring.

Love is a bird that must be handled with care. Hold it too tightly, it will choke and die. Hold it too loosely, it will fly away.

Love clearly has its ebbs and flows as well. It is not always the quickened heartbeat at the sight of the beloved, the thrill of looking into the beloved’s eyes. It is the quiet pleasure of knowing that the loved one is nearby.

Love ebbs in the face of mundane problems that couples usually cope with. As they try to solve these problems, love momentarily takes a backseat, but is never really gone.

It ebbs when the green-eyed monster, jealousy, appears, manifesting the insecurity of one or the other and when either spouse is disillusioned with the other.

Love flows, as couples know only too well, after the cares and worries of the world have been set aside, when concern is manifested for each other, when each realizes that trust has been well placed, with every act of thoughtfulness and self sacrifice for the loved one.

Would lovers have it any other way? Perhaps. But it would be wise to remember that life is characterized by change. Love either wanes or grows with each passing day.

Men and women of whatever age, who are in love, should realize that they need to work hard to keep the flame of love glowing. Taking each other for granted, uttering words that hurt, breaking one’s word, showing a lack of trust, these are little things that erode love, definitely no-nos for lovers everywhere.

I guess avoiding such pitfalls should not be too difficult-if one truly, truly loves