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~
You would say anything.
And you would try anything
to escape your meaningless
and your insignificance.
You're uncontrollable
and we are unlovable...
~
There was a lot of words that I wanted to believe..
but I thought and said to myself that..
"they're just words..they can't do anything to a speechless person like me.."
maybe just because of this, all the words that I have are meaningless for me..
but the meaningfulness of some words is
so funny really..
so funny..
I can put a smile on my face but I can't put it on my heart..
and nobody can realize that if I don't want to say..
I can seem like a person who I am not..but I am not able to be myself..
espically these days I know better that I am a really good player..
I can act to myself too but I can't convince myself also..
it's so funny..
I can cry for an another person but I can't smile for myself..
I can touch an another person but I can't feel myself..
I can say everything but I can't believe anything..
and..
Everybody can look at me but all they can see is a person who I want to show to the others..
and..
it's so funny really..
when I'm desiring to live so badly all I can do is just dying easily..
~
song: "Escape" by muse..
and a last one..
(X .. I can write better things when I had a bad day .. X)