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Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok..
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Stand on toilet, get high on pot.
Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal a** all over town.
A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Virginity like bubble, one p***k all gone.
Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor
Virginity like bubble, one p***k all gone.
Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless b*****d.
Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons.
He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.
Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
The hand that turneth the knob, opens the door..
Man who sneezes without hanky takes matters into his own hands.
He who eats to many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
Man who drop watch in toilet bound to have shitty time.
Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.
War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
Virginity like bubble, one p***k all gone.
Man who eat prunes get good run for money.
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who scratch a** should not bite fingernails.
7/5th of all people do not understand fractions.
43% of all statistics are worthless.
A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
You can lead a fool to wisdom but you can't make him think.
"A Wise Man can see more from the bottom of a well than a Fool can see from the top of a mountain." .
"You never test the depth of a river with both feet."
"Hear and you forget; see and you remember; do and you understand."
"The believer is happy. The doubter is wise."
It takes both sunshine and rain to make a rainbow.
Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.
Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.
There are no short cuts to any place worth going.
Free speech carries with it some freedom to listen.
A man who thinks too much about his ancestors is like a potato—the best part of him is underground.
A ship in the harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Your heart understands what your head cannot yet conceive; trust your heart.
A peacock who sits on his tail is just another turkey.
He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.
It is never too late to be what you might have been.
If you are willing to admit faults, you have one less fault to admit.
You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom.