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Hey, Journal time. Welcome to my prof. Glad you came, watch out for the Zombie cats around your feet when you walk in. Be sure to say hello to everyone who's dead. Feel free to step on their heads, they don't mind, they can't feel it after all. Oh, and don't touch Bessie, she may blow your brains out...

Anyways - Ah! Don't touch that! - Any ways, not much happening worth really talking about in my life, literally nothing for me to do but sit around in front of this computer and listen to music, rp, and be here with all you wonderful people. I can't believe you've all been here for me...actually no I can. I'm like ******** you all!! Actually no, I probably wouldn't -

*gunshots*

We're sorry, the person you have reached, is dead. Good-bye.

DAMN YOU, BESSIE!!!!!