Il y avait l'exemple de ma vie;
Pendant que je me suis tenu au dessous dans l'obscurite,
Pendant que je me suis tenu au dessous dans l'obscurite,
...Qui fut tut..
So, today I had an EPIC three hour experience that will forever be somewhere in my mind. It may seem like pure hilarious stupidity at first- but it actually gets good at the very end. Not for TL;DR people.
I was online about 1 am, bored as ********. On Gaia and Tek-Tek there's some random social site called "IMVU" always being advertised. I decide to try it out- it looked like a mix of Sims2 and Gaia. Figured it couldn't be too bad.
So I download it, make an account, do the tutorial. Seems like it could be fun. then BOOM- There's a man in a shiny little black thong on my kitchen counter. Before I could properly assess what was going on, he's typing at me in horrible Engrish about how he's a very poor man, and how he can see up my (avatar's) skirt. Or rather, "I be see up you dresses".
After a moment of "WTF"-ing in my mind, he says "it look so sweat". I can only assume that he meant "Sweet", but as Keith pointed out- who the hell knows? At this point, I'm shocked back into my senses and proceed to chew him out. At some brief point after telling me that my v****a could either be sweaty or sweet, I managed to inform him I was American, and (fictitiously) engaged- trying to figure out how to get this conversation normal and/or how to block him. He tells me he's 25, and from Dubai. Hence the ******** hardxcore Engrish.
After a brief moment of almost normal small talk (because I was still trying to figure out how to block him) the screen moves, and our avatars clip together; looking like some obscene Silent Hill monster or Salvador Dali painting. I ask him, "What just happened?" to which he responded- "I kiss you, you will like". I try to tell him that I don't want to kiss, I just want to talk to people and make friends- But apparently he didn't give a damn because he punched me, then kissed me again. I go nuts, telling this guy what a b*****d he is while trying to find the "Block User" option (Sorry if I was a tad negligent on MSN at this point, I was typing furiously at him).
I tell him over and over, "I have a fiancé that I love very much, and have no interest in you." Then, he gets pissed off at me, and starts to call me a whore. He also says that if my intent with my "futre husband" was true, wouldn't even be on the site. Because as he said, "all people want here is sex". I tried to explain that I have no intent to cheat, just to explore the site, and maybe make a couple friends. He seemed annoyed by this, and called me a liar. I tell him that I could do as I damn well pleased, and didn't care what he thought about my intentions. I know, I know. Arguing online is like the Special Olympics (both of which Jacob and Keith laugh at, shame on you), but I was getting pissed off, and haven't had a good verbal argument in ages.
Expecting him to leave after telling him where I thought he could stick he opinions, I panned off to something else. I looked back, and he was actually responding. He started going on about "how you talk to a man like that you be beaten for it". Okay. I'll admit it, this is where he started to get to me. The b*****d was telling me I was going to be beaten for going against HIS religious and cultural ideals, when just moments before, he was looking up my ******** virtual skirt. I was about ready to show him which level of Hell I belong to, when he dropped the verbal sexual assaults and told me (again) about how poor he is. "I poor poor man" over and over and how "all clothes I have in real life is just one breif like this". As a side note- all misspellings in his dialogue are intentional to demonstrate what a illiterate, Engrish b*****d he was being.
Once again, this got to me. I had to call him on it. I asked repeatedly how he had a computer and internet, but no clothes. After saying once, "Interesting question", he completely avoided it. How poor could he have been with a computer able to run a program with equal graphics to WoW with out lagging?
After a few cat and mouse attempts at getting an answer, I find myself in a ******** airplane. Completely out of no where. I was ********. He asks, "How you like me plane?" Yes, I'm serious. Guy could have been ******** Borat for all I know. Anyway- I tell him it was, "very nice, but what the Hell am I doing here". As seems to be the pattern, he ignored what I said and demanded that I told him who I am, and kissed him- because, apparently that's why we were there.
Trying to block him, leave the area, anything, I tell him to go ******** off and leave me alone. I'm saying "********" a lot in this. Back to the story- I eventually decide that this guy is obviously very lonely, so I tell him we can be friends as long as he stops kissing me, or trying to cyber. Now he drops one of the biggest things that annoyed me- "man and woman can never be friends" and that all male and female relations are either family, sex, or nothing at all. Now seeing how 99.9% of my friends are packing a p***s (mentally or physically) and I'm obviously not sleeping with all of them, this annoyed me to no end.
Taking into consideration that his culture is very different than ours, I try to explain that men and women can be friends. They can talk, go places together, watch movies, and even hug, just being friends. He clearly doesn't believe me, as shown in this quote.
Guest_VoleurdeThym: I have lots of friends that are boys, always have. I have more guy friends, because I like the same things they do.
Guest_VoleurdeThym: I'd never want to be in a relationship with them, or have sex with them, though.
Guest_EjazA: ok
Guest_VoleurdeThym: So, you think men and women can't have friendships with out sex?
Guest_EjazA: they are all gay?
After this he said that he was 10000000000% (number of zeros an estimate) sure that men and women can't just be friends. He asked me if I shook hands with them, and that I hugged them (my male friends). I responded that I do both, and try to give hugs everyday to the friends I see. Once again he took up the Holy Roller gauntlet and started preaching to me about being a whore- because, as he went on to explain, all contact that wasn't crucial to survival was considered sex- unless it was with a close family member. Stupidly, I admitted my attraction to women as a point of how it'd be damn near impossible for me to have any friends at all. I had to laugh when he told me, "your futre husband shold beat you". I wish I was making this up.
Then, he asked me to explain what American culture counted as sex, and what was okay for friends. After giving him brief over view that could be mostly summarized as HUG=/=SEX, he asked a couple simple questions. Like, "kiss not sex but still only for selected mate?" and "you not ******** your futre husbands friends?" Just when I thought there was progress, it crashed. I tried to calmly explain, "No, but I hug them, and talk to them a lot" when he jumped back on the, "but you touch them, you cheat and have sex with them!" wagon.
----------------Where it starts to get epic---------------------
Determined (God, I hate my determination to do stupid stuff), I set out once again to explain opposite sex, intercourse free friendships when we somehow came to the conclusion that I must be male. He said that I spoke so well, and was so intelligent, that I could not be a woman. Then he starts to ask me if I'm a gay man ("maybe...I zuck ya d**k"*), and if that's why the straight men wont have sex with me. I assured him that I was female, not a whore, and have never cheated on my mythical fiancé.
Once more, he demanded to know who I am, and said that all women want on this site is sex- so I should stop being stupid and give in. Then, out of no where, he starts to be civil, and once again asks about American culture- although this time in general. Normally I'm not a big endorser of the ol' USA, but compared to this guy, I'll take it.
I told him how in America, we value the idea of no one being discriminated against. I told him about dating, love, gay people getting married, civil rights rallies… everything I could think of. He listened as I spoke, quiet, except for the occasional "okay". I asked him at the end about why he would volunteer to lose out on so much knowledge and friendship by excluding female friendship in his life. Again, no answer, but what happened next was better than any answer I'd expect.
Then, after a while of talking, he said he wanted to tell me about the Muslim culture he lives in. He told me of the separation of classes, and the separation of men and women. Men can't talk to any relation past first cousin with out it being considered wrong, unless it was completely necessary to do so. And even though, it was frowned upon. For the next 40 min, he starts telling me about what a bad Muslim he is for fornicating with women on "IMVU", but talking to me was okay, because it was different. We were talking about being Muslim. Which, he seemed to be convincing himself of. He also seemed a bit drunk at this point.
I couldn't help but pity him when he started to talk about how lonely he is, and how he can't argue against his lifestyle of isolation because its "what's right". He seemed so trapped. He also told me about how he was learning English with the hopes of moving to England some day, but he couldn't afford it. When I asked why he wanted to move, he told me that he wanted friends, and a life like I had described to him.
As if feeling guilty about what he had just said, he changed topic to my religion, by asking what it was like being Christian. I explained to him that I wasn't- apparently he thought all Americans were Christian. So, I proceed to tell him about my religion- Process Theology. The idea of there being no God, and all of this being some wonderful, beautiful coincidence …he really seemed to like the idea. He kept asking questions about the worship, beliefs, and other such things of Process Theology. The lack of anything to it amazed him to no end, and he really wanted to learn more. I answered all the questions I could until about 4 am, when Jacob called. I told him that I had to sleep soon, and that my fiancé just called, so I had to go (Jacob called, close enough).
He begged me to stay, and talk to him more about my religion. He wasn't okay with me leaving until I promised to come back and talk to him tomorrow. Then, as we said good bye, he asked if he could call me his friend. This… meant so much to me. To be the first intelligent female that's questioning anything that he's ever known. And so soon, making someone start to be more aware of how they feel about their life…
I think Keith summed this up perfectly with,
The7Gravemind (5:24:32 AM): so yeah, no pressure Danny, you just have all of female western civilizaton resting on your back, kay?
I was online about 1 am, bored as ********. On Gaia and Tek-Tek there's some random social site called "IMVU" always being advertised. I decide to try it out- it looked like a mix of Sims2 and Gaia. Figured it couldn't be too bad.
So I download it, make an account, do the tutorial. Seems like it could be fun. then BOOM- There's a man in a shiny little black thong on my kitchen counter. Before I could properly assess what was going on, he's typing at me in horrible Engrish about how he's a very poor man, and how he can see up my (avatar's) skirt. Or rather, "I be see up you dresses".
After a moment of "WTF"-ing in my mind, he says "it look so sweat". I can only assume that he meant "Sweet", but as Keith pointed out- who the hell knows? At this point, I'm shocked back into my senses and proceed to chew him out. At some brief point after telling me that my v****a could either be sweaty or sweet, I managed to inform him I was American, and (fictitiously) engaged- trying to figure out how to get this conversation normal and/or how to block him. He tells me he's 25, and from Dubai. Hence the ******** hardxcore Engrish.
After a brief moment of almost normal small talk (because I was still trying to figure out how to block him) the screen moves, and our avatars clip together; looking like some obscene Silent Hill monster or Salvador Dali painting. I ask him, "What just happened?" to which he responded- "I kiss you, you will like". I try to tell him that I don't want to kiss, I just want to talk to people and make friends- But apparently he didn't give a damn because he punched me, then kissed me again. I go nuts, telling this guy what a b*****d he is while trying to find the "Block User" option (Sorry if I was a tad negligent on MSN at this point, I was typing furiously at him).
I tell him over and over, "I have a fiancé that I love very much, and have no interest in you." Then, he gets pissed off at me, and starts to call me a whore. He also says that if my intent with my "futre husband" was true, wouldn't even be on the site. Because as he said, "all people want here is sex". I tried to explain that I have no intent to cheat, just to explore the site, and maybe make a couple friends. He seemed annoyed by this, and called me a liar. I tell him that I could do as I damn well pleased, and didn't care what he thought about my intentions. I know, I know. Arguing online is like the Special Olympics (both of which Jacob and Keith laugh at, shame on you), but I was getting pissed off, and haven't had a good verbal argument in ages.
Expecting him to leave after telling him where I thought he could stick he opinions, I panned off to something else. I looked back, and he was actually responding. He started going on about "how you talk to a man like that you be beaten for it". Okay. I'll admit it, this is where he started to get to me. The b*****d was telling me I was going to be beaten for going against HIS religious and cultural ideals, when just moments before, he was looking up my ******** virtual skirt. I was about ready to show him which level of Hell I belong to, when he dropped the verbal sexual assaults and told me (again) about how poor he is. "I poor poor man" over and over and how "all clothes I have in real life is just one breif like this". As a side note- all misspellings in his dialogue are intentional to demonstrate what a illiterate, Engrish b*****d he was being.
Once again, this got to me. I had to call him on it. I asked repeatedly how he had a computer and internet, but no clothes. After saying once, "Interesting question", he completely avoided it. How poor could he have been with a computer able to run a program with equal graphics to WoW with out lagging?
After a few cat and mouse attempts at getting an answer, I find myself in a ******** airplane. Completely out of no where. I was ********. He asks, "How you like me plane?" Yes, I'm serious. Guy could have been ******** Borat for all I know. Anyway- I tell him it was, "very nice, but what the Hell am I doing here". As seems to be the pattern, he ignored what I said and demanded that I told him who I am, and kissed him- because, apparently that's why we were there.
Trying to block him, leave the area, anything, I tell him to go ******** off and leave me alone. I'm saying "********" a lot in this. Back to the story- I eventually decide that this guy is obviously very lonely, so I tell him we can be friends as long as he stops kissing me, or trying to cyber. Now he drops one of the biggest things that annoyed me- "man and woman can never be friends" and that all male and female relations are either family, sex, or nothing at all. Now seeing how 99.9% of my friends are packing a p***s (mentally or physically) and I'm obviously not sleeping with all of them, this annoyed me to no end.
Taking into consideration that his culture is very different than ours, I try to explain that men and women can be friends. They can talk, go places together, watch movies, and even hug, just being friends. He clearly doesn't believe me, as shown in this quote.
Guest_VoleurdeThym: I have lots of friends that are boys, always have. I have more guy friends, because I like the same things they do.
Guest_VoleurdeThym: I'd never want to be in a relationship with them, or have sex with them, though.
Guest_EjazA: ok
Guest_VoleurdeThym: So, you think men and women can't have friendships with out sex?
Guest_EjazA: they are all gay?
After this he said that he was 10000000000% (number of zeros an estimate) sure that men and women can't just be friends. He asked me if I shook hands with them, and that I hugged them (my male friends). I responded that I do both, and try to give hugs everyday to the friends I see. Once again he took up the Holy Roller gauntlet and started preaching to me about being a whore- because, as he went on to explain, all contact that wasn't crucial to survival was considered sex- unless it was with a close family member. Stupidly, I admitted my attraction to women as a point of how it'd be damn near impossible for me to have any friends at all. I had to laugh when he told me, "your futre husband shold beat you". I wish I was making this up.
Then, he asked me to explain what American culture counted as sex, and what was okay for friends. After giving him brief over view that could be mostly summarized as HUG=/=SEX, he asked a couple simple questions. Like, "kiss not sex but still only for selected mate?" and "you not ******** your futre husbands friends?" Just when I thought there was progress, it crashed. I tried to calmly explain, "No, but I hug them, and talk to them a lot" when he jumped back on the, "but you touch them, you cheat and have sex with them!" wagon.
----------------Where it starts to get epic---------------------
Determined (God, I hate my determination to do stupid stuff), I set out once again to explain opposite sex, intercourse free friendships when we somehow came to the conclusion that I must be male. He said that I spoke so well, and was so intelligent, that I could not be a woman. Then he starts to ask me if I'm a gay man ("maybe...I zuck ya d**k"*), and if that's why the straight men wont have sex with me. I assured him that I was female, not a whore, and have never cheated on my mythical fiancé.
Once more, he demanded to know who I am, and said that all women want on this site is sex- so I should stop being stupid and give in. Then, out of no where, he starts to be civil, and once again asks about American culture- although this time in general. Normally I'm not a big endorser of the ol' USA, but compared to this guy, I'll take it.
I told him how in America, we value the idea of no one being discriminated against. I told him about dating, love, gay people getting married, civil rights rallies… everything I could think of. He listened as I spoke, quiet, except for the occasional "okay". I asked him at the end about why he would volunteer to lose out on so much knowledge and friendship by excluding female friendship in his life. Again, no answer, but what happened next was better than any answer I'd expect.
Then, after a while of talking, he said he wanted to tell me about the Muslim culture he lives in. He told me of the separation of classes, and the separation of men and women. Men can't talk to any relation past first cousin with out it being considered wrong, unless it was completely necessary to do so. And even though, it was frowned upon. For the next 40 min, he starts telling me about what a bad Muslim he is for fornicating with women on "IMVU", but talking to me was okay, because it was different. We were talking about being Muslim. Which, he seemed to be convincing himself of. He also seemed a bit drunk at this point.
I couldn't help but pity him when he started to talk about how lonely he is, and how he can't argue against his lifestyle of isolation because its "what's right". He seemed so trapped. He also told me about how he was learning English with the hopes of moving to England some day, but he couldn't afford it. When I asked why he wanted to move, he told me that he wanted friends, and a life like I had described to him.
As if feeling guilty about what he had just said, he changed topic to my religion, by asking what it was like being Christian. I explained to him that I wasn't- apparently he thought all Americans were Christian. So, I proceed to tell him about my religion- Process Theology. The idea of there being no God, and all of this being some wonderful, beautiful coincidence …he really seemed to like the idea. He kept asking questions about the worship, beliefs, and other such things of Process Theology. The lack of anything to it amazed him to no end, and he really wanted to learn more. I answered all the questions I could until about 4 am, when Jacob called. I told him that I had to sleep soon, and that my fiancé just called, so I had to go (Jacob called, close enough).
He begged me to stay, and talk to him more about my religion. He wasn't okay with me leaving until I promised to come back and talk to him tomorrow. Then, as we said good bye, he asked if he could call me his friend. This… meant so much to me. To be the first intelligent female that's questioning anything that he's ever known. And so soon, making someone start to be more aware of how they feel about their life…
I think Keith summed this up perfectly with,
The7Gravemind (5:24:32 AM): so yeah, no pressure Danny, you just have all of female western civilizaton resting on your back, kay?
...et qui ne fut rein...
d'autres sont montes recevoir le baiser et la gloire!
Il est fait bien. Et a deux doigts de ma tombe, je l'approuve.
Il est fait bien. Et a deux doigts de ma tombe, je l'approuve.
