Once upon a time in a land far away (well not really but to make this story somewhat interesting let‘s just say it was), there was a loser-err cool person named Gina. Gina was relevantly lame-err cool with her…..stuff. Why no person would dare insult this weirdo or look at her strangely…….unless she was not wearing the paper bag on her head that she was usually forced to wear by her parentals. But Gina craved a better life in this far away land that wasn’t actually very far, but unfortunately, she was held captive by Attila the Hun for some odd reason….so yeah….
“I’m flippin bored.” She lamented as she played with her nineties GameBoy. She then abruptly sat up and decided to call her friend Kat. Kat would know what to do.
After a couple of rings, Kat answered the phone. “Why am I being involved in this stupid story?” Kat grunted.
“Because I’m bored an you’re my first victim! WAHAHAHAHA!” Kat held the phone down while Gina talked, she was used to her friend occasionally rambling on when she had nothing better to do. She could do without the evil laugh though.
“Why don’t you call someone else? Like Victoria or even Krissy?” Kat meekly suggested. After a long pause, Gina huffed and put it as gently as she could.
“They would turn this story into something perverted. Do you really want them to jump up on something like me being held captive by some old dude? Just think about it, this would go from 4kids to adult swim and quite possibly HBO if I call one of them.” Gina thoroughly explained while doing a bunch of unneeded hand gestures that Kat could obviously not see.
“True…” Kat somberly agreed. “But you do realize us talking on the phone isn’t story material unless it involves something interesting…Like maybe we can use my rats and-”
“ENOUGH WITH THE RATS!” Gina rudely interrupted.
“What’s wrong with my rats?” Kat asked offended.
“It’s just……you seem kind obsessed with them…and it’s starting to weird me out a bit.” Gina quietly confessed. Kat was silent for a few moments. “Oh come on, don’t tell me that actually hurts your feelings?”
“It doesn’t hurt mine. It hurts the rats’.” Kat coldly replied while stroking Star or Chewie (chewy?). Gina merely rolled her eyes.
“I’m sorry the mice’s feelings got hur-”
“THEY’RE RATS!” Kat this time interrupted clearly irritated with her friend.
“SAME EFFIN THING!” Gina yelled on the phone.
“You know what?! I can’t associate myself with somebody who thinks rats and mice are the same thing! GOOD BYE!” Kat then slammed the phone which was stupid because it was her cell and it didn’t have a hook. After clumsily fumbling around with it, she finally managed to snap it shut. “Don’t worry, she didn’t mean it.” She whispered into the rats ears while petting them.
“Well fine! I’ll just call someone else!” Gina declared frustrated. After looking through her contacts a thousand times on her cell, Gina realized she really didn’t have anyone else to call. “Dammit, this story sucks.” Gina mused to herself. But because she needed another plot device really badly, her phone rang. “Hello?”
“What’s your favorite scary movie?” The person asked in a low tone.
“Ah dammit,” Gina grumbled.
“Did you say God dammit?” The voice crackled.
“No, I said AH dammit.” The most annoying thing in the world was having religious people near her hear her say that and then get all upset when she didn’t really say it.
“Oh…Well umm do you want to play a game?” The voice inquired while laughing.
“No, who’s this?”
“What? You’re not scared?” He anxiously questioned.
“Please, you’re using a lame catch phrase from some third rate horror movie from the nineties. Did you really expect me to be afraid of you? And what kind of serial killer asks that anyway? WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE SCARY MOVIE?! That’s like a porn star calling me and asking what’s my favorite pornography? I mean, were you on crack when thinking that up? Or are you just some teenage boy with no dates, no friends, thinking he’s a bad a** because he called some girl and asked her a question like as if she was taking a survey. I’ve gotten telemarketers scarier than you.” After ripping him a new a*****e, Gina smiled at her cleverness and waited for a reply. When she heard sobbing on the other end of the phone, she grinded her teeth. “What the ******** is everyone’s problem today?!”
“It’s just…YOU’RE SO MEAN!!” The voice screamed while whimpering.
“This story is just getting worse and worse…..Okay forget the water works and tell me who you are before I get angry. And you wouldn’t like me, when I’m angry. Well I’m sure you wouldn’t like me if I wasn’t angry, but that’s not the point. So who are you?”
“Open your closet and you’ll find out.” The voice breathed out in a chilling tone.
“Ummm…..I don’t have a closet.” She could hear the guy curse under his breath and cry some more.
“Isn’t this Miley Cyrus I’m speaking to?”
“No, I’m Gina.”
“Oh…well how embarrassing I dialed the wrong number! Wow, this sure is awkward.”
“Yup.” Was Gina’s usual reply when she was half way listening.
“Well umm sorry for disturbing you.” He said politely.
“No problemo.” Gina then hung up the phone. “Sooo ummm now what?” Gina asked herself like the crazy person she was.
The Beatnik Beauty Community Member 
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