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To say I am broken would be an understatement. I can't pick a known
emotion to fill this hollowness. I say I am numb, because I am void of
all emotion and expression. I don't eat or drink. I haven't gotten
dressed or brushed my hair. I stay awake until I crash. It's not as bad
as last time; at least within the first day I was able to eat. I asked
my ex if there was any possibility of us getting back together. His
response led to the conclusion of not in high school. And yet, just
this morning, he argued about taking me to junior prom next year. How
can I be so in love with someone who casts my heart away? I haven't
cried. I don't know if this is out of shock or the numbness that
engulfs me. I am hoping I will be able to find the strength to go to
school tomorrow; and still I worry least of me. How is he doing? I
don't know. I can't find the strength to text or call him. I'm afraid
of what I will see if I look into the eyes of the dragon. So with all
of this, how do I choose? With my heart telling me to keep trying, and
my mind speaking of a dead cause.

((Written and posted elsewhere on 2/1/09 ))