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School is coming too fast. It seemed like yesterday was the first Friday of Spring break. But in all reality it wasn't. At least I get to see my friends soon. I've probably only been home three days of the break. The other days were spent at my aunt and grandmother's house. Today I went to Coco beach and I'm burnt to a cinder. I just hate my skin. Even with sun block, and reapplied every 45 minutes, for a total of 5 times. I still burn... I AM HOPELESSLY PALE! I HAVE NEVER HAD A TAN IN MY LIFE! Well now that that is out of my system. I've been murdered with new music in my aunt's car. I hate the new stuff. Then again I'm retro to the extreme. If it were up to me I'd have nothing but classical symphonies on my mp3 but I have to have a balance in the force or else I'd go more insane and off the edge than I already am.

I've been rambling a lot lately. More than usual which isn't a complete good thing. But I suppose it could always be worse. How much worse I will never know unless I pursue it to be worse. See proof of my rambling! Heh oh well.

I don't like it in my house. Nor at my grandmothers. I no longer feel safe around those I love. I can't be at ease when I sleep. I feel like I'm going to die at any minute by nothing at all. It is no joke for those reading that think it is a laughing matter. I just have a feeling that I will never be the same again. That I will never be able to truly laugh or smile the right way ever again. No rainy day will put me in my goofy moods. I'll be stuck hiding in my closet like I once did as a small child. But still feel scared and unsafe in the once safe haven of my room. Evil has found its way into the very place that it once could not. My sanity. It's crushing faster and faster and pretty soon I'll be screaming for someone to shoot me like my best friend.

As for my best friend, (you know who you are), she contracted lice this week. She wasn't happy since she had just gotten off of restriction. No sooner had that happened she's stuck at some and can't see me till school starts back. I still have that monster that I promised you by the way.

I guess I better leave this post where it is and rant more tomorrow. Congratulations to myself for finally typing my longest post ever. Here's to more posts in the future and the remains of what little sanity I still retain.