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My grandpa's funeral is tomorrow and I had actually forgotten for a little while.

I don't really feel any grief of any sort, but I REALLY don't want to go. REALLY. I hate feeling depressed and going to a uncomfortable church with a group of people (half of which I will not know) to sit together and inspire tears and wailing out of each other.

I'm sorry, but I find absolutely no point in it! It might have been useful in the old days when people simply wanted to pay their respects, but its been completely tainted in today's world. It shouldn't cost you thousands of dollars to die, and the people who want to mourn your passing shouldn't have to pay even more fees to sit together and weep. Since grandpa lived past his retirement, there's no money left to his name and my grandma is left to pay for everything! THAT'S BULLSHIT PEOPLE. That isn't how it's supposed to be. It even costs you to get buried, because there literally isn't enough graveyard space in virtually any burial grounds.

Seriously. When I die, I want to either donate my body to science, or get creamated and tossed wherever the hell people want. And no funeral. If people want to pay their respects, I demand that they all go out for a nice dinner instead and chat about better days, rather than getting depressed over and over again.

This is a serious conundrum for me, since I pretty much boycott funerals, but I know that not showing would give almost all of my family members the wrong idea and they'll pretty much despise me for eternity. I'd rather they hate me for different reasons. In fact, I'd just rather they hate me. Then I wouldn't be expected to do so much and get yelled at when I don't talk to everyone frequently.