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My life in a nutshell
I write something here if I feel like it. Sometimes a lot, sometimes only a few words. Sometimes about things that keep me thinking, sometimes about random stuff which suddenly comes to my mind.
Marriage - Am I not old-fashioned enough?
A classmate of mine got married this month.
After a three-year relationship her boyfriend proposed to her.
We all were very happy for her. She showed off her engagement ring for days always letting us know how incredible lucky she was - if we wanted to hear it or not. sweatdrop
"It was about time." She said. "I was beginning to wonder when he'd pop the question." Mmmmh, ok...

A few weeks ago my friend Jenny (also a classmate of mine) told me her boyfriend asked her to marry him.
After a four-year relationship they are going to get married next year, probably in late summer or in early fall.
"I was thinking he'd never ask!" she said with relief. Ooookayyyy...

Another classmate of mine (whooohooo, hat-trick! lol ) didn't take this all too well. When I wanted to know what her problem was she explained herself as followed:
She wants to get married too but her boyfriend isn't keen on the idea like she is.
At least she could convince him to move in with her. (Not a very bold step after being 15 years together if you ask me. neutral )
"He just doesn't ask me." She said frustration filling her voice. Well...

Two or three days later (I'm not sure) we all sat together and all of a sudden she showed us pictures of her bridal gown.
"This is the dress I'm planning to wear on my wedding day."
"But didn't you say he wouldn't...? Did he ask you?! How good for you! Congratulations!" Jenny cheered.
"No, he didn't."
"Huh? Oh! So you did the asking?" I said.
"No, I didn't."
"..." What can I say. We were confused.
"We talked about it and now we get married next summer." Wtf...?!

I couldn't restrain myself.
There they were. All three of them together sitting right in front of me. I had to ask them.
"If everyone of you is living in such an intact and loving relationship, if you love your boyfriend so much that you spent years living with him, if you have been waiting so long for a proposal, if you wanted to get married so badly... why didn't you ask him to marry you?"

They looked at me as if I had grown a second head on my shoulders.
arrow "No. I think it should be the man who proposes. It's more romantic this way."
arrow "I tried a while ago but he refused. He said he wanted to do it if the time was right. And he did! biggrin "
arrow " eek The boyfriend asks his girlfriend!"
"But why?" I demanded to know. "Why is he the one who always has to do it?"
"Because."

Seriously folks I didn't know whether to laugh or to bang my head on the table I was sitting at because of that mass of stubbornness.

Let me ask you something:
Is it really necessary for a woman to wait for her proposal instead of taking matters into her own hands? Why not ask him?
Is it really necessary to wait - perhaps for years?!
Or has it become a disgrace for women to propose and no-one told me?
Apparently it has. Just look at my classmate. "We talked about it and now we get married next summer."
What did they do? Negotiated a contract? Sounds more like she decided and he only plays along. Dear God...

I don't know why I get that worked up when I think back of this situation with those three. The whole thing seems so wrong to me.

Am I really not old-fashioned enough? gonk


~ Daily Oxymoron







User Comments: [1]
Traditio
Community Member





Mon Jun 21, 2010 @ 06:54am


Hmmm...I actually think that this makes you more open-minded and definatly one of the individuals that I'd like to surround myself with...for a few reasons.

1. We're not constrained by common societal beliefs.
2. We Question all that is set into specific order for further knowledge.
3. We are most certainly not dumb.

smile All of that is my kinds of people, and you are definatly one of them!


So, to answer your question, no...you're perfect and unique in your own beautiful way.


User Comments: [1]
 
 
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