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Kokoro no Ukeire
"HEART'S ACCEPTANCE" Just a journal filled with stories ideas, poems, personal entries, things to remember, etc. If you have nothing better to do, just relax and read. Who knows, maybe you'll see what the hell goes on in my head everyday.
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I don’t know why I was running.
What started out as a walk to clear my mind ended up as sprint for my livelyhood. All I wanted was to get rid of the thoughts plaguing my mind, and maybe watch the sunset from the beach. But no, instead, I began to run.
I’m passing pedestrians and other joggers. My hair is a wreck, and I don’t even need to run a hand through its curls to know. I’m running against the wind, and it’s really cold. I’m only wearing a light sweater.
I’m still running though.
From what, I wish I knew. To what, I don’t even care. I don‘t seem to be tired either. Sure, I can barely feel my legs, but I’m not tired.
I can hear soap opera music in the background in my head. It’s cheesy, corny, and honestly a bit catchy, but it’s true. I wonder if people can see my head bobbing slightly to the tune.
Now that I think about it, people are probably wondering why I’m running. Or why my brown eyes are all shiny and glassy. Or why my face looks all red and sweaty. Then again, they’re probably thinking how weird I am since it looks like I’m trying to copy one of those music video scenes where the main girl is running with the sun setting at the beach as the background.
I’m not trying though. I’m just going on a run to get rid of the thoughts, and let my mind focus on not collasping right where I stand (or run).
Ew. I feel gross. And smelly. I need to take a shower in a big way right now.
But the wind does feel good, even if I’m going to feel the results of this experience tomorrow or sometime later tonight. THE BURN IN MY BUNS MEANS IT’S WORKING, RIGHT?!
If that’s a no, I’m screwed.
I barely manage to turn my head to look around. I’m tempted to slow down, but my legs are so used to being tortured now they won’t stop without my full attention. Ignoring the screaming my legs are trying to say - “Would you stop already? I can’t feel the ground anymore!” - I take note of the fact I don’t know where I am.
Seriously. I don’t. I’m lost.
But hey, what do you know - I’m still going foward, not stopping a bit.
Maybe I should listen to my body. Not to the screaming just yet (not yet, not yet) but to the example it’s trying to show. I’m moving forward. Past all these obstacles, there’s this place I don’t know, and from the look of the sunset, it’s quite lovely. I don’t know the people around me, but they don’t seem to want to stop me from moving.
They let me move forward and fly.
“-WAIT!”
I suddenly realize someone had called my name from behind me. I turn, but I don’t stop moving forward.
“WOULD YOU JUST STOP FOR A MOMENT AND LISTEN TO ME?”
“HUH?”
Suddenly, a car drives up next to me, a bunch of angry senior citizens behind the vehicle. A familiar green color, the Jeep continued to drive.
“WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN? I’VE BEEN DRIVING UP AND DOWN THE GODDAMNED COAST LOOKING FOR YOU.”
I almost trip over a crack, but as I stumble, I manage to keep up my pace.
 Ukeire · Tue Dec 22, 2009 @ 01:57am · 0 Comments |
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