I like proving myself to others.
Especially myself.
...Its not that I want to show off. Its that I want to show others I'm capable of what they think I can't do. Or won't do.
Maybe its just me. Maybe I want to show the world that I'm not so average.
...Maybe.
I don't want to sit back and watch the world pass by idly without me doing something to change it.
"What're you thinking about?"
When you asked me that, I couldn't answer. You might think its dumb, I say.
"I won't." So you say.
Will you understand?
Will you comprehend what I mean??
I'm a deep thinker. I think you realize that, at least.
"Linds?"
No, maybe you don't. Maybe you think my mind is simple.
I don't think that really works out for anyone.
But really, my mind is a mess.
"Why is it a mess?"
It just is, I say. I look out the window of your bedroom, seeing a white fence around the house next door. Your bed seems to want to swallow me.
I love it.
"You...You ok?"
I think I'm nodding off, because the next thing I know I'm in your arms-inhaling your unique scent and hearing the deep thudding of your heart.
"You're tired, aren't you?"
Yes. Yes I am.
I'm tired of the world. I'm tired of expectations. I'm tired of pleasing.
I answer him back with a tired nod, and burrow my face into his chest. I zone out the rest of my mind, and soon I'm in a bliss.
A pure bliss of content, feeling safe, and love.
Its the best feeling in the world.
But...I still want to prove to you how much I really do love you.
Someday, maybe you'll see the extent of my love to you.
Someday.
I just hope that day isn't so far off.
Especially myself.
...Its not that I want to show off. Its that I want to show others I'm capable of what they think I can't do. Or won't do.
Maybe its just me. Maybe I want to show the world that I'm not so average.
...Maybe.
I don't want to sit back and watch the world pass by idly without me doing something to change it.
"What're you thinking about?"
When you asked me that, I couldn't answer. You might think its dumb, I say.
"I won't." So you say.
Will you understand?
Will you comprehend what I mean??
I'm a deep thinker. I think you realize that, at least.
"Linds?"
No, maybe you don't. Maybe you think my mind is simple.
I don't think that really works out for anyone.
But really, my mind is a mess.
"Why is it a mess?"
It just is, I say. I look out the window of your bedroom, seeing a white fence around the house next door. Your bed seems to want to swallow me.
I love it.
"You...You ok?"
I think I'm nodding off, because the next thing I know I'm in your arms-inhaling your unique scent and hearing the deep thudding of your heart.
"You're tired, aren't you?"
Yes. Yes I am.
I'm tired of the world. I'm tired of expectations. I'm tired of pleasing.
I answer him back with a tired nod, and burrow my face into his chest. I zone out the rest of my mind, and soon I'm in a bliss.
A pure bliss of content, feeling safe, and love.
Its the best feeling in the world.
But...I still want to prove to you how much I really do love you.
Someday, maybe you'll see the extent of my love to you.
Someday.
I just hope that day isn't so far off.
