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Barbie's Heart This journal is just a peek inside my head and my heart.


l l B A R B I E l l
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It's the worst feeling in the world to love and hate someone all at the same time. And it's hard to watch things change when all you want is for them to stay the same. It's crazy when you want to let go, but you keep holding on, and you want to move on, but you're stuck right where you started. When feelings come and go and you can't decide what you want. When you have so many things to say, but you don't know where to start. When you want them in your life so bad, but all you can do is push them farther and farther away. It’s so hard to think back to how things used to be and look at it now and realize that things are different, and they may never be the same again. You tell yourself it's not worth it, but if it really didn't matter, you wouldn't spend so much time thinking about it.Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well that’s how I feel right now. I feel like I’m facing everything by myself with nothing left but tears and a fake smile.Instead I watched him slip away. I watched him fade into a memory 'cause I knew that was best. I knew my heart couldn't take it anymore, and I knew I'd be all right without him. Tears ran down my face as he vanished into the distance. It felt like each step he took was a memory fading, a promise breaking, and a love dying. I was okay. He went his way, and I went mine, though the memories were left behind, about a silly girl and foolish boy in love.




 
 
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