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I might be kicked out of my ******** house cause we have not been able to pay our bill. I might not be able to be on gaia for a while. I do not know I will find out monday and if that is the case I think my wedding might have to be delayed I am not sure yet but I am pissed off yet sad at the same time. If this happens to me I do not know what I might be able to do. why does this ******** s**t always happen to me? am I doomed to have a miserable ******** life? I swear its like the universe does not want me to be happy. Its like itas trying to get me to become ******** emo cause if that is the case I think I might become emo and ******** kill myself just to end this ******** misery. emo too all my friends you have been great and to marine I love you with all my heart. I just hope none of this happens. today was the first time I have cried in 10 years