I had a hard day today. I slacked off in Geometry not on purpose and I probably failed the test we got. I got super hot and irritable and in 3rd period (cooking) someone who was supposed to stay with me ditched me to go home. It's ridiculous, they get paid and yet they don't stay. We made pumpkin pie and it turned out pretty good (From scratch, save for the filling.), though there were people that were supposed to be there but weren't. The boys in my group slack off and don't do any work. On a better note... I've forgiven Brian. He shared candy with the whole class today. In sewing, the vest we were working on was due at the end of the period. I couldn't finish it. But it's ok, I guess... Every additional period I take to finish it will cost me 10% off the final grade... I hope I'll feel better soon. I kinda snapped last night at someone on my gaia account. I hope they didn't report me. I'm still working on moving. Mabye I won't slack and I'll work better if I listen to music?
I had a bit of a realization, too... I can't eat new things because I don't want to. It's because I get sick and nervous, like I'm about to eat something inedible, like a knife.. The teacher made chai tea for us in cooking class.. I asked for half a cupful and when it cooled, I tried to force myself to drink it. My palms got all sweaty, my heart began racing, and I felt like my throat was swelling shut. But I just couldn't. I got really sad because then nobody else wanted it even though I hadn't even drank out of it, (They're dicks. They won't even share stuff with you unless your skin color is like their's.) and that I had to toss it down the drain... I thought of all the people in the world who would have been happy to have it, and it just made me even sicker.
-Sera
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