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Here We Are, But We're Still Lost
I have spilled my heart on this journal and now I am making it public. I doubt what you will find will interest you much. It's only my battered soul. Lol, sorry, that was really angst, wasn't it?
Joshua

I dreamed that Josh returned back to our high school. A threat no longer lingered over his head, no anger trailed his steps.

Sweet kept her distances. Lifted her lunch tray and walked away. Sat by her new love and did not look back. I stayed sitting, watching her leave, perhaps glad that she was gone.

Josh turned to me. His eyes were bright, looking to mine. His gaze reaching mine was like his mind slipping into mine. It obvious I wanted to talk to him. I swallowed in the sight of him, his hair was the same length as always, but had lightened to it's natural color.

I was so glad to have him back. He spoke first, saying it was nice to see me again. We talked some, but then suddenly he was gone and I was outside marching and shifting through papers from chemistry.

In the morning I woke, my dream on the surface of my skin. So close in time, but so thinly remembered. I crawled out of bed, careful not to wake my sleeping friend. Went downstairs, quiet, and sleepy. I made muffins and then headed back upstairs to wake my friend.

I asked about her dreams, she said she only remembered chopping down a tree. I told her about marching and the chemistry papers. Then I paused, knowing something was missing. Then I remembered bright and playful eyes. Hair that was longer than mine and intelligence. So much intelligence in one person. I felt a pang of sadness. The pain is beginning to grow dim though. For how much longer can I hold onto a person who was never really apart of my life?

How much longer until I give into new memories and new people?





 
 
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