My uncle is in jail, going to prison for a while(again), other uncle is doing nothing. Theo is to scared to go visit him. Someone that is more than twice your age thrown into jail again, you having to look at him, lecturing him, telling him that he may be spending the rest of his life in jail, who wouldn't be afraid of telling someone that of being the grown up. (so I got to do it.)
As for me, my plans are ruined. I saw it coming, but there was nothing I could do. I had a plan and answer for everything. But I knew that was coming because it's the only thing I didn't have a answer to, a back up plan to.
My life put on indefinite hiatus, more responsibilities on my shoulders, alone and I'm to much of a ******** good guy to say ******** it all.
The fact that I'm alone hits me harder the more I think about it. I stare at my cold hands I can see the tension in them. One hand pure rage(why do I have to be the good guy, why should I ******** care, I had the messed up childhood. I had to learn the meaning to pain, responsibility, fear, overcoming fear AT AGE FIVE, and always ALWAYS helping someone no matter what messed up s**t I had to deal with, even though I knew none of these people would hear me ******** screaming.) the other hand a sad cold truth(I am really alone.)
BUT hey what can I do? I'll still be the good guy because I'm the last one left, Hopefully I wont go over the edge anytime soon. Man I'm ******** up...
 b.l.Tiger · Sat Mar 17, 2012 @ 10:13am · 2 Comments |
