Before I even start with this story, understand this. I don't want grammar Nazis telling me what I did wrong where this and that goes. IDGAF. This is what I go through each day, that's the point of this story.
There is a girl. She sits in a chair. Rocking chair, wooden one. She sits rocking back and forth wondering about where she went wrong. Wondering why it's only the bad things that happen to her. Her hazel eyes fixed on the blowing branches of the tree in her yard. A mere second of her thoughts were interrupted by her cat jumping into her lap. Her hand starts to pet the cat as she begins wondering again. What is it that she did to deserve all of this? She continues to rock in the rocking chair. She glances to her right. Right beside her is a figure. A dark figure. The white of its eyes visible. The figure gives her an evil smirk and whispers "everything." She lets out a sigh and closes her eyes tears start to roll down her face. 'Is it really?' She opens her eyes and the figure is still sitting there, it nods. Its evil smirk never leaving its face. Her hand still moving along the body of her cat. Her gaze returns to the tree. The rain comes down in a pour. Lightning danced across the sky as thunder claps. She realizes it's her demons and storm raging on shows no sign of ending. She also realizes she doesn't understand how her mind works. She wants to understand. She hears a chuckle and her eyes close once more. The figure whispers once more to her "you're broken. There is nothing you can do to change that." Another flash of lightning danced across the sky. A loud clap of thunder rolls shaking the walls of the house. She sighs as another chuckle from the demon is heard. 'Nothing? It has to be just a nightmare. Has to be. Isn't it only a nightmare?' She looks at the demon once more. "Nothing. You are broken. It's not a nightmare. This is your reality. Nobody's reality but your own." She sighs feeling helpless. This feeling had been coming quite often. Along with frustration. This demon knew it had its grip on her emotionally and mentally. The frustration coming from those who couldn't understand how she felt. How she thought. How she worked. She was frustrated that she couldn't explain how she felt. Couldn't explain how she worked without getting frustrated and angry. She reached up with her free hand to try and stop the free flowing tears. Another clap of thunder this time before the lightning danced across the sky. She wanted this frustration gone. She wanted to understand how other people worked and thought. She wanted to feel normal. She was always different. Even her brother's wife found her quite odd and made fun of some of the things she enjoyed. She wiped some of the tears away and let her hand rest on the arm rest of the rocking chair. Another chuckle from the demon. Lightning danced across the sky and another clap of thunder. "Nobody will understand you. They will only judge you. Nobody understands what they can't see or feel." The demon growled as if proud to say this. "They will always think they can fix it. Even if it means they think you will feel better if they are around you or in your presence." She sighed heavily. Some of the things her demon said was true. The demon let out an evil laugh knowing its words rang true. Its grasp grew tighter on her emotions and mentality. She felt like an old soul, ready to rest. Her cat stood up and stretched before jumping down. Her eyes looked down at the cat. She sighed heavily as she stood up. The storm seemed to get worse. The thunder growing louder and lightning danced across the sky. The lightning growing more violently. The demon stood. The cat meowed as it made its way to the door. The wind began to howl. "Maybe it's better you give up and kill yourself. Nobody will miss you. They never understood you anyway." The demon moved closer to her, chuckling. "No. That's not true. Just because I'm misunderstood.... Just because nobody understands me or how I am...." She began as she looked her demon in the eyes. "Just because I wonder where I went wrong.... It doesn't mean I'm worthless or I just need to kill myself." She turned to the door of the house. "You may be my reality.... You may be my demon, but I'd never off myself. People would miss me. Maybe even get pissed off, if I tried." She reached for the door knob. "I have family and friends. It may be impossible for them to understand what I go through. Get pissed because I get violent at times. Especially when I try to open people's eyes about my differences. Open their eyes on what I go through. I understand they will never understand me. But that is one thing I would never do." She opened the door. She walked into the house and the demon was quick to try and run in behind her. But before the demon could get to the door, the cat ran in and the door slammed in the demon's face. She locked the door. The demon began banging on the door, growling. The storm was still raging on. The house shook from the loud thunder and the now strong blowing winds. She put her back to the door and slid down watching her cat walk off to the kitchen.
~My storm keeps raging on but I have to keep persevering.
 Jayda Ookami · Sun Mar 12, 2017 @ 06:06am · 0 Comments |
