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He was expressionless as he stared up at his ceiling. He was studying an interesting crack, shaped somewhat like a rabbit. His pale hands were crossed over his pale stomach. It was raining again, and anybody in their right mind wouldn’t be lying on their bed without a shirt or socks on in a room with open windows. One could really see how thin he was when he wasn’t wearing a shirt or his vest. It was really a wonder how he could be as strong as he was with such a slim build. But he was all muscle, and it showed when he fought.
Screams...he could hear them...The horrified voices...the yelling...the sickening squelch of flesh being penetrated...
His eyes glazed over.
He felt himself being pried off the man, ice blue eyes glittering with purpose. He felt the icy fire running through his veins...He slashed out with the icy claws he had formed, trying to get away from his captor. He felt the blood on the claws, warm on the ice. He longed to sink them into something else, longed to kill again. He thrashed, but his small body was no match for the strong hold of the ninja. He bit at his captor’s hands and reached for the man he had been attacking. He was out of his mind with bloodlust. He had to kill. Must...Kill...
Thunder boomed outside Kay’s window. He jolted awake. No...No more...He would never, ever, let that happen again. That he was sure of, if of nothing else in this world. He sat up.
A small white blur flew from the doorframe and landed squarely on Kay’s chest, knocking him back down. He made a startled noise as the thing landed on him. It curled up on him and made a small noise. “Kitsune...is the thunder scaring you?” The little white dog was shivering on his almost equally white chest.
‘Would I be in here shaking if it wasn’t?’
“You have a point.”
The little Jack Russell Terrier looked at him with a “No, duh.” expression on his face.
“Well, you know it’s just thunder, so why does it freak you out so badly?’
‘Because it’s loud, there’s a big blinding flash before it that hurts my eyes, it makes the ground shake. If you were my size, how would you feel about that, eh?’ he said in a dry tone.
Kay nodded, “I see how that could be.” Kay and his dog were pretty close. The ninja liked to have a dog around, and Kitsune was a very fun dog to have around. He was a bit spastic, but very loyal and had a good sense of humor, in a canine kind of way.
‘Kay...why aren’t you wearing a shirt...or socks? With the window open, at that. It’s freezing in here.’
“Ah, my furry friend...Does cold ever bother me?” he pointed out.
He gave a doggy shrug. ‘Only when it’s on the inside.’ the dog replied. ‘Then you don’t like it all.’
He sighed. “True...very true.” he said softly. “Kitsune, I really just don’t know what’s going on with me. I can’t...” He stopped and took a deep breath. “I keep having flashbacks...back to when I killed those people...” He was hoping that his dog would have some words of wisdom or comfort.
‘Kay-Kun...It’s not your fault...You couldn’t control the Hound. Now is not the time to start thinking about it too much. You’ve got a lot of things going for you right now. You became one of the youngest Jounin of all time, you have control over the hound and you’re exploiting its powers to make all sorts of new jutsus and sharpen your senses. I mean, what’s the point of thinking about the past? It’s the past. You can’t change it, so stay in the here and now,’ the dog replied in a matter-of-fact tone.
Kay nodded. “Thanks, Kitsune. That really helps,” he said with a slight smile on his pink lips. He put his hands behind his head, linking his fingers in his silvery hair. “You know what else I’ve been thinking?”
‘No. I don’t.’
“I’ve been thinking about my parents.” He had a glare in his voice as he continued, “Inconsiderate hypocritical heartless morons, if you ask me. Do you know that they never once tried to help me or keep me from being thrown out from Mist? They didn’t even give me provisions. The only thing I got from them was my teddy bear, and to do that I had to sneak in through the window. I managed to get provisions from Kage’s house, since he came with me.”
He looked at the worn teddy bear on his bookshelf. That thing had been through Hell with him. Somehow, through everything that had ever happened, through all of those fights, storms, and mad scrambling to get out of dangerous places, he’d managed to keep his bear with him. It seemed that there was something almost magical about the way he never lost it. In all probability he should have lost it on their journeys. But he didn’t. He had no creative name for his bear. Mr. Bear. That was it. He’d gotten the bear when he was far too young to have given it an inventive name, and he liked it just the way it was. He smiled at the thought of the bear’s name. “Mr. Bear. Where would I be without him? My comfort blanket for all of eternity. Heh.” He smiled slightly, “I don’t think I’d’ve made it without him. Just like I wouldn’t’ve made it the rest of the time without you.”
That was another strange thing. Kitsune never seemed to age. He’d been with Kay for almost the whole time he’d been in Konoha, which was over ten years. Lots of strange things like that happened around Kay. He couldn’t explain it.
And, quite frankly, he didn’t want to. If his dog would be with him until he died, he had no problem with that. Sometimes he wondered if Kitsune was some sort of quote-unquote “Demon” as well. Meh. It really didn’t matter that much to him.
Kitsune seemed to give a doggy smile. ‘I know. Don’t you just looove me?’
Kay laughed. “Yes, I do.” The dog flopped over onto his back and Kay happily scratched his stomach. Kitsune seemed pretty happy about it, too. Kay went back to staring at the rabbit crack in the ceiling. “So...what should we do tomorrow? If it’s not raining anymore, that is.”


~

The next day dawned just as bleary and grey as the day before. He sighed, rolling over onto his stomach. He then stretched luxuriously. It was going to be another lonely day at home; just him and Kit and a pot of tea. He eventually found the will to get out of bed and get something to eat. The white skinned boy walked into his kitchen and got out a box of crisped rice cereal. He poured it in his bowl and topped it off with milk and tons of sugar. Despite the cold, Kay still wore no shirt or socks, and his windows were still open. He ate his breakfast quietly, enjoying the serenity of the silence. He felt at peace with the rain falling outside his windows.