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..........big sigh.........my life sucks,everthing goes wrong..........another big sigh.i should have a good cry......cant because there are to many people about......another big sigh..........i feel a headache coming on............damn i love my kids.............sigh...............i actually know very well what i should do to change things,but i dont want to,i dont want to feel the pain.....then again this isnt the best feeling either..........running away seems like a nice,simple thing to do....but it wont solve anything..............why is the best way usually the difficult (read painfull) way?.............sigh.....writing this down didnt help,at all