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So... Right now my life is in a million pieces. Everything I had... everything I knew... it's gone. Monday November 7th... my fiancé told me he is moving out. He wants to be on his own... he wants time to be himself.. to learn who he is. I'm so confused. I know he loves me... but right now.. we are going diffrent ways.

I know we were slipping apart, but we talked... we said we'd work on it, but... appearantly... he couldn't... he said he just have to go. I can't hold him back... I have to let him go, no matter how much it hurts. And now it REALLY hurts... alot.

We've been together for 7,5 years... engaged almost 5... and have a son together that turns 3 in exactly a week. Now... everything is changing and I don't know what to do... There isn't much I can do. I jsut have to live on and believe that I will be ok. Though right now it's incredibly difficult. I love him... I saw him as the man I wanted to marry and have even more children with.
Nothing is saying that will NEVER happen of course, but...

I took of my ring today... it was so incredibly hard to do. I cried so hard. I had to find another irng to put on the finger or I would have felt so naked. His and mine rings are now hanging on a black satin band each.

Wow... I never thought I would be in this situation. It's not like I took him for granted, but I still thought we had a stable relationship and that we'd really be able to work things out.

I am lost... and I am confused... but I know that I will be ok.

Like he, I too need to take a break and try to find me.... get to know myself as my own individual. I've been with Pontus since I was 16 years old... and now I'm 24. Neither of us have had the chance to grown on our own.. or grow as individuals.

I'll be fine.... eventually.... right now I'm just... a mess. But I have wonderful friends who's there for me, trying to make me smile and they do succeed. it feels odd saying... but.. I'm single... Though my heart belongs to Pontus...

I'm fine... I'm broken... but slowly mending.

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