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the life and death of a death_fay.
I plain to write my thoughts down about life people and death. I also may write a story or two when the mood strikes me
What is love? I can’t tell any more. I felted such passion when trying to make my friend into my girlfriend, such happiness when being near her. It made me feel alive.
Now as we get closer and when we make love I get this feeling of sadness and anger that is just as powerful as the ecstasy. I feel like I am destroying her, killing her and myself at the same time. As my body quivers with ecstasy part of my mind tells me that I must stop or all is lost. What is wrong with me? She wants to have sex, part of me would do anything for it; and yet I hate it and her for how it makes me feel, so sad, so numb, so evil.
And I feel something wail up deep inside of me that I fear, such anger and madness. I don’t know what to do. I can’t make her feel pain but I can seem to tell her the truth ether. I am scared, I never have been scared like this before





 
 
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