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I am so confused. My heart is pulling me in two directions. I wake up at night with thoughts of despair in my head. I feel like I am dying inside a little bit each day. My girlfriend had dumped me and when we got back together it didn't last because of me and my over-active conscience. I had just been dumped and the next day a friend revieled her true feelings. I don't know if it is love, or just my heart not wanting to be alone. I felt the shame and told her everything. I am no longer worthy of her. Part of me still loves her. I feel like the person that I was is slowly drifting away. I am confused and I don't know where to turn. As I sit here writing this I can't help but wonder why I did such a thing. I feel cold. I have nightmares where I am running and there comes a fork in the road. I am still standing there unsure of which way to turn. I have felt no worse pain. My heart tearing itself in half at the fork in the road. I am sorry...Amber.