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wow, havent posted a journal entry in a long time, but i was inpired. well, i started colouring again, its wierd how you dont miss something until you start again. school has been going very strangely, things happened this year, that if they happened last year i would have thought to be devastating, that id never recover, but this year have only made me, and i believe others involve, stronger and better for it. at the beginning of the year i was so sure what i needed to do this year, i would NEVER get depressed again for as long as i lived, and to an extent this is still true, but i also promised no more hitting, but i have, and for unbelievably stupid reasons. i promised myself homework is first priority, but it hasnt been, im aware of all these promises ive broken, and i just cant seem to change them, i cant go "today you are going straight home to do math homework" because then i just hop on the computer, like i never said it. i have no i dea why this is my head space, but i will try to change it again.