|
I ******** hate my mom at the moment. .___.
She's such a b***h. Dx I hate her. I hate her. I hate her.
...
She isn't fair.
I'm depressed as hell at the moment, and all she can do is say... "I told you so!"
What the hell. Dx
For one, she doesn't know what the ******** she's talking about. o-o She's ASSUMING she's right. o-o But I don't even know the whole story.
For another, she hasn't even ONCE acted as if she gave a damn. o-o
She says things like... "You not supposed to get serious when you're just kids, anyway..."
"I knew this would happen, you were such a bad influence..."
...
"I should have made it so you couldn't see him the first time it happened..."
*stares blankly*
No, "Awe, that's too bad."
No... reassuring hug saying some crap like, "Oh, don't cry. It's going to be alright..."
Only my dad gave me anything like that. o-o
But, it's not like I need it from them. o-o I just hate that she's being a b***h to me right now. It makes it hard to stop my eyes from welling up again. xD
And then, I went and vented on a person who completely messed me up before and then just came back like nothing ever even happened. o-o
Just 'cause there was no one else. Dx And I know I probably shouldn't have. .___. I didn't really say much though. Just the fact that I was depressed...
...
I'm such a stupid chikka. o-o My dad says I shouldn't get so worked up over it~
He likes to go on about how it probably won't end up happening and I'm just wasting my tears. o-o
But honestly. xD At the moment. Everything that I have ever cried for. Ever.
...
Just feels so pointless. So useless. So... undeserving of tears. o-o Everything just feels so empty. This moment in time. This situation. These feelings...
They're the only thing that's ever felt so real to me...
An actual... emptiness... pain deep inside that I just can't rid of...
And it hurts like hell. But maybe I should be looking to some sort of bright side...
...
But, I don't see any. .__.
...
Meh.
I love you so much. More than anything ever. And I always will. No matter what...
...
I'm making myself cry again. xD Stop it, stupid girly.
I'm just... so scared. ._.
...
I guess I'm going to go to bed now...
Honestly, I don't know if I'll be able to get to sleep...
But I guess I'll try. o-o Being awake hurts too much. xD
I'm afraid of the dreams I might have...
Well, good night then. o-o
I miss you terribly~
I love you~
Bye.
- Sakura Lied.
 Lyccea · Tue Mar 20, 2007 @ 03:45am · 0 Comments |
