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took me thirty or twenty min to type this
Its my beliefe that some are born with a purpous, others are born to help said person, and just others are born just to facilitate a life for the hero or heroin and his charges. is that makes any sense.




see i feel the same as you do most of the times, and the only reasion im in such a state of atrophy is because i just cant take it anymore. I dont see why theres a reason to live if were all going to die anyways, and i cant see the reason of living is theres no point in my life. I mean, why shouldi just be born to be part of the masses. why was i born and why am i so different?
why why why! that only ******** thing i can think of~ Im so disgusted by it, i overanilizee and cant see the pourpous of doing something unless i know why. and if people dont tell me why in the right way, then i just figure its not that important and leave it out. and it gets me into messes, but its just so hard for me to do otherwise and when not explained i just cant get it. and now ive just given up, and they wonder why i just lay around and do nothing. its because i dont have the will to live anymore. i just cant see why, cant see why i was born to have no pourpus. i cant see why i was born and why i cant be lke anyone else and why i overanilize and why people dont ask why anymore, why do we just accept, why ******** why why why.Its just driving me a little nuts every day, and im starting to gett hese headakes and cant stop this depresion. i could take it when i actually had thoes kinda friends that you hang around with and wanna do s**t with you and dont mind walking around just to find something to do and im just hating the fact that now there really is nothing to do in maine except do what i am and get my a** up in the afternoon after i sleep from 3am-1am and start in on gaia. hell i cant even see the point in getting a job except that im gonna need to and go though that every day and its just gonna meld into every day being every day and nothing will ever be new for me and ill never get anywhere and ill never do anything with my life because i never had a pourpous in the first place because everyone is like me because theres so many ******** people in the world and im so small and i cant concentrate sometimes because its not something that i like and its hard for me to stay on track and its so hard for me to do znything without thinking and starting to cry again and again and i dont even know why i cry half the time and it so pisses me off because i know what i want to say during the time im crying i just cant stop and i bawl and do all the most patetic things when i cry and i cant figure out why because im not really upset most of the time, it just like something wants me to stop from me frm making my point and i just i just want to scream sometimes but ive just lost the ability to do that and theres just to many things happining and theres to many restrictons to my actions that ioverly thinkabout and i proceses it wth like three minds and i just want to ahhhh
wow. i have allot more to say i just dont want to burden you wiht any more of my crazyness o-o''' that took forever too





 
 
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